video

[glitterateur]

[There’s a lot of noise in the background of this video post. Like, way more noise than usual when Mabel’s face shows up on the network. One could say almost… exactly double the noise?]

Hi! Hey. Important question. I know everybody’s busy with stuff but this is a matter of life and death probably? Through forces beyond our control we have an animal that-- well look!

[The camera pans. Two twelve year old boys (who look suspiciously like tiny versions of the Stans) are riding a magnificent creature around a living room. Dipper watches anxiously, but seems resigned to the situation. He has the look of someone who has walked through the flames of hell and can now withstand anything. The camera stays on the chaos long enough for one of the Stan kids to fall off the… thing. The lower part of the thing. The part you can conceivably ride on.]

It’s a centaurtaur! And we’re not sure how it breathes? Or eats. We have some, um, theories but we can’t test it because we can't reach. So if anyone’s ever had any experience with an animal like this or you’re pretty tall and willing to help us do some research please let us know! Thanks.

Comments

video; 4eva

[alreadywon]

Who's Ford? [Why did he summon it? What is happening right now?!]

video;

[ursawhiner]

Ford's our uh... [Dipper glances at the two 12 year olds trying to climb back onto the centaurtaur.] He's our friend.

video;

[alreadywon]

That doesn't look... safe?

Do you need help?

[ursawhiner]

We just need to figure out how it eats. Probably. I think we'll be fine?

[Everything else is pretty much just regular Pines chaos. ....With no responsible adults present.]

[alreadywon]

Maybe it...

[...no. No, he has no idea what it might eat.] Hopefully it gets its nutrients some other way? Somehow? I guess... I mean, you could set up an IV if everything else fails?

[ursawhiner]

An IV might work. We'll use that as a last resort, though.

[alreadywon]

Okay. I could probably help if you need stuff.

[ursawhiner]

...You just have access to IVs?

[alreadywon]

[...UM] My family has a medical company. [or... a medical company that's a front.]

[ursawhiner]

And they're here?

[Dipper's looking more and more suspicious.]

[alreadywon]

Yeah. He owns Wayne Enterprises. [ID name checks out, Dipper]

[ursawhiner]

Oh, I've heard of them. Last I heard they were making action figure of imPorts or something.

[alreadywon]

Yeah, they have a bunch of different business interests.

[ursawhiner]

And they just let you take medical equipment.

[alreadywon]

I think this would count as kinda a charitable donation?

[ursawhiner]

I don't think writing centaurtaur down on the form is going to get you anything, man.

[alreadywon]

Endangered species.

[ursawhiner]

That... might work. If no one's paying attention. But like I said, it's a last resort, so don't do anything yet.

Thanks for the help, though.