maskormenace | ♫001

[ Video switches on to show a man with a ginger ponytail in a hideous green v-neck frowning deeply and looking incredibly disappointed and/or frustrated, sitting on a park bench as dusk settles in.]

Okay, I've been here for less than a day, so would someone mind explaining to me how it is that the United States government can allocate all these funds to keep us imPorts in nicely furnished, comfortable homes in several cities, and expect native businesses and companies to provide us with paid employment, yet its own citizens are still facing what seem like absurd rates of homelessness? Like I said, I only just arrived, but it didn't take me long to find people who have lost their jobs and homes to make way for the growing imPort population.

[ Someone spent his whole first day in Heropa in a park, befriending homeless people. Continuing on, he sighs heavily, as though this is personally wronging and inconveniencing him, not people he doesn't even know. ]

Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying we're to blame for this. After all, it's not as though it's our fault some unstable technology yanked us from our worlds and lives. Of course this world's government would have to provide for us until we can return home. But every single one of us has the responsibility to give back.

So, what are you doing to help? I'll be taking donations to start up a charity for natives displaced by our presence, if you can't come up with anything on your own.

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Huh. That second one could be helpful. Meanwhile, the only power they gave me was the ability to talk to any kind of rodent, which I tried out with a chipmunk earlier. All it wanted to talk about was a squirrel that stole it's breakfast, though, so I can't exactly see how useful it'll be.

[ Yep, this guy hasn't started hanging out with hordes of sewer rats yet. ]

Oh like -- [ Piper already could, but evidently that hasn't happened for him yet. Honestly, Mick isn't entirely sure how it happened in the first place, he hadn't asked. Also, was he supposed to address the future or was there some weird time travel rule about it? This is already giving him a headache. He decides to leave it. ] -- your fairy-tale? Y'know, rats.

Seems to me like whoever -- whatever decides the powers got a grim sense of humour.

Edited 2016-06-07 00:36 (UTC)

I actually hadn't thought of it like that. I guess this is just more broad in definition? I guess it does still fit the theme, though...

[ The thought obviously pleases him. Whatta nerd. ]

No kidding. I wonder what they do with people who already have powers.

Now you just gotta fit it in somehow. [ It's kind of nice seeing Piper like this again. Nostalgic. Mick's not consciously aware of it, but he's smiling pretty broadly. ]

Might be a question worth asking.

Apparently Barry Allen is here. Maybe we should ask him.

[ Because DC Comics Hates Nice Things, Mick is just, completely confused by that statement. And it's obvious on his face. ]

Barry Allen... Who was that again?

[ He has no idea that Barry Allen is the Flash. And he doesn't look like he's joking.

The name sounded familiar before, though, so maybe Piper's the connection?? ] Was he an ex of yours?

What.

[ There really is no other response to that. ]

...Did I miss the mark? Sorry.

How do you not know who Barry Allen is?

[ He's baffled enough to let the horrifying idea of Barry being his ex go... for now. ]

Should I? [ And Mick is clearly baffled in turn. ]

Yes, obviously.

[ A celebrity, maybe? Mick's not always on top of those. ]

Sounds like I missed the memo somewhere. [ He shrugs. It's not that important, right? They're getting off topic, though. ]

By the way, where'd they put you?

[ He's so baffled that he just lets Mick change the subject. ]

Government housing in Heropa. #20, I think, but I haven't been by yet.

[ His mouth makes an "o" before he gives a warm smile. ]

Well ain't that a coincidence.

...You too?

[ He grins. ]

Won't that be just like old times? Though, hopefully less awful than some of our old hangouts.

I don't even think it's possible to be as awful of one of those. [ He laughs a little, nostalgic. ] Naw, it's fine. Cozy. Better'n most places I've ever lived, to be honest.

Right. Without Boomerang around to vomit in every corner and behind every piece of furniture, there's no way it could be anywhere near as awful.

[ He feels a bit bad laughing considering the guy's dead, but... it's Digger. And it's true. ]

If he ever turns up here, d'you think it'd be wrong to kick him out?

I think it would be more wrong not to.

For the sake of the furniture, at least.

Anyway, since you're going to be living here -- want me to pick up anything from the store?

[ Dryly: ] What, the government doesn't pre-stock our fridges, too?

[ UH.

He rubs the back of his neck. ] Well... yes, actually. It does.

[ This pause and disbelieving stare is giving you ample time and warning to hang up, Mick. ]

I didn't notice at first but -- it's got the basics. [ He's not quite looking at the camera now, don't look at him like that. It's not his fault! ] ...You're gonna suggest we donate it, aren't you?

[ He sighs, like this is personally offensive to him. ]

No, we need to eat too.

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