ONE ❀ TEXT.

[dreamcatcher]

( she's relying on the relative anonymity of text, even though Emma can't exactly hide who she is, when the network tracks every user. still, she can't help herself, and in a town full of others that just got a heaping helping of powers they didn't ask for, it seems like a good time to ask. )

how do you handle having powers that are so much bigger than you?
how do you control it, so nobody ends up hurt?

Comments

[magnitudes]

I'm contemplating the good old "lock yourself away where no one can find you and crawl under a rock" method
I can let you know how it goes

[dreamcatcher]

I'm not sure that would work for me, it'd have to be a pretty heavy rock
but I guess it's the thought that counts.

( not really tho she could really use a serious answer! )

Private - Audio

[cantwalkwithoutit]

What's happened?

[dreamcatcher]

( you're going to make her actually talk, are you? saying it out loud is harder, and there's a heavy breath before she finally admits it. )

Nothing, it's just getting worse. I'm surprised you couldn't tell.

It's the curse. Your curse.

( it's not really his, but it's easy to identify it that way. )

private text

[notsheepish]

[Oh, boy... What a fun and not concerning at all topic.]

Hey, are you okay? What's going on?

[dreamcatcher]

( no, it's totally cool and fine, just like always! only, it's not, and she's finally willing to admit it. )

I'm cursed, Ruby. dark one cursed, full of black magic cursed.

text;

[slightlyoffchilt]

Do you require psychological help for that?

[dreamcatcher]

what? no.

( Y E S but she's just barely able to ask for advice on magic, she is not ready to go into her emotional problems, too. too bad they're intertwined!!! laughsoversalad.jpg )

( text )

[drizzle]

[This is definitely a topic she can understand since she is having trouble with keeping her own senses from overwhelming her.]

It depends on many factors, I suppose. But in my case, I try to keep it under control by paying it no mind or doing things to distract me enough from noticing it. Although, lately, it's been difficult to do any of those things on my own. I would suggest doing what you're doing now -- opening up about it, and asking for help.

There are all types of powers here. Many people who may be experiencing the same weight as you do. You'll be surprise there may even be items that can help you take some of the weight off your shoulders too. Just know you aren't alone on having power issues.

[dreamcatcher]

I've been trying to ignore it, and that isn't working. I've got to figure out something else
items? really? like what

( what she really wants right about now is her dagger, but she's not sure if that's in the cards. anything that made her feel safe from the edge, that there was some way to control it no matter how bad she got... maybe she'd feel a bit less like a monster. )

im so sorry for all the edits i html failed that last time

[earnedmystripes]

stay calm, thats the most important part
itll be okay, i promise
tell me more about your powers. i can probably help you
we can also talk in private if youd prefer that

PRIVATE

[dreamcatcher]

( it's almost easier talking to a stranger about it. the people from home, those are harder to disappoint with the truth. )

magic. dark magic. lots of it
calm is easier said than done, I'm trying, but when it happens... it's hard to stay calm. I've lost control before, before the curse, but even then it wasn't as bad as this.

private audio

[dreamshades]

[ Ah so there is something up. He had a feeling. Sorry, Emma he's come to troll. ]

You embrace it, Saviour, but, you've always been bad at that.

[dreamcatcher]

( fucking great. she'd have loved for Pan especially not to see this. )

You're about the last person I'd ever take advice from.

text

[divaricate]

That's a question I'm still working on myself, too, even when I have the same powers here as I did back in my world.

What I can tell you is that a friend of mine - back in my world, not here - told me that sometimes not everyone can be saved or protected, even when we try our best, but if we let that guilt consume us and we can't live with it, it might mean that no one comes out unhurt next time. And someone here told me last month that honing your skills, learning the limits of them, and not take it away from yourself. In my case, my powers can get pretty scary, honestly, but I'm trying to keep these things in mind, and it helps some.

[she knows it might not be the most reassuring answer on the planet, or the kind of answer the woman's looking or hoping for, but.. it's the two cents she can offer sincerely.]

[dreamcatcher]

it's easier said than done to not think about who I didn't manage to help.

( Graham, Neal, August, the whole town when Pan cursed it. she's not much of a savior, she's learned that quite well, and now she's taken on magic so much bigger than she can handle. why did she ever think she could do this? )

have you ever felt like you're more of a threat than you are a hero?

( Emma isn't sure she should be trusted with her own magic any longer, when she loses control so easily and people get hurt more than the alternative. )

[ text ]

[dualismum]

it's not always easy, and sometimes it can be very scary. It's important to keep calm and it's important not to always be afraid.

There are many people here, with many different powers. Perhaps there is someone with powers similar to yours and who can help you better.

[dreamcatcher]

I think I should be afraid. if I'm not, that means I'm not being careful enough.
I hope so. I don't think I can handle this on my own anymore.

( maybe she never could, actually. )

text

[pummelgranite]

You can't. You'll fuck it up.

But it helps going in, if you know who you want to fuck up.

[dreamcatcher]

( she doesn't like this answer, but at least it feels honest. )

controlled fall, huh?
I wish I could say I thought you were wrong.

text »

[trigeminalheadache]

Find someone with the same/similar powers who's willing to help.
I've had to swallow my pride and do that. I still struggle with it sometimes, my power. But I'm in a better place than I was even a month ago.

[dreamcatcher]

( Emma has someone around with exactly the same condition she does, yet asking him for help is harder than she'd like to admit. )

and it's gotten better? what did you do to learn control?

text;

[redhott]

patience and dedication
when mine first appeared as a kid it was awful
but I was committed to training so that I could eventually use it for good

its not perfect
it never will be and there are things I will never be able to do in my life
but its not hopeless

[dreamcatcher]

I'm sorry.

( she wants to believe this curse will be broken one day, that she'll go back to her version of normal. which also wasn't perfect, but it was better than this. to talk to someone that's resigned to never escaping a power that overwhelms them? it's a good reminder that she's not the only one suffering. )

what was your training like? how did you learn control? that's what I need, control.

text | id reads "power girl"

[boobwindow]

You're not just your powers, for starters.
You've got to practice.

[dreamcatcher]

every time I use it, I feel like I'm getting closer to losing control. it makes it a lot harder to be willing to practice

( she almost wishes there was a way to take them from her, but she knows better than to ask that any more. if she doesn't have them, someone else will. that's how this curse works. )

what do you mean, not just my powers

text ; private ; id says blue beetle

[khajidont]

It's not always easy. Especially when we never asked for these powers in the first place. But even the scariest, biggest powers can be used for something good.

The best thing I can tell you to do is practice and practice with people you trust, away from people you're scared of hurting. If that's what you need, there are people here who'd be willing to help you.

[dreamcatcher]

( private. man, that was a good idea. all of this could have stood to be more private... )

I think it's what I need. practicing, I mean, or just an outlet.

I hope you're right, that they can be used for good. I want to believe that.

( it's harder, though, knowing her magic is the definition of evil in her own world. can even that be used for good? )

[Text]

[renamaer]

It can be so difficult and painful. You might even have to confront the fact that no matter how good your intentions are, you end up doing more harm than good.

But it's still possible to get through it, with the help of your friends.

There are so many people here, with all kinds of abilities; maybe you can find someone with a similar experience to help or advise you.

[A few minutes later, meant very sincerely:]

I don't know if there's anything I can do or offer to help you. But I'd like to, if I can.

[dreamcatcher]

( honestly, that's part of the problem. she was supposed to face this darkness with her family, with the man she loves. now she's facing it more or less alone, with only a few faces from home, and only one of them particularly friendly. )

have you had to face that before? hurting more than helping?

and thank you. that's really kind of you to offer a total stranger.

I have magic. a lot of magic. do you have any experience with that?

Video

[foreshadower]

It takes time, honestly. Time, experience, and restraint.

The latter is the most important, of course.

[dreamcatcher]

( video. that's exactly what she doesn't want to deal with. the fact that she turns on her video in response is actually quite surprising, though she does flip it to private as she does so. )

And how do you learn the latter? That's what I'm trying to find out.