O4 👶 ANON TEXT;

[pillz]

(cw murder, survivor's guilt, brainwashing?, jokes at the expense of trauma survivors, etc.)

good morning assholes

[(it's 3:00pm est.)]

u all remember the blackout shit mid jan 2017. count dooku rounded up 1direction to look @ the prison breakout using our magical superpowers. this is what we found.

short: electronics went out. nobody got any idea why but pi adachi believes its strictly tech. b4 they knew it, prisoners got loose & it was a fuckin massacre inside the compound walls

guards: some of them wuz evil. obv an inside job. these fucks maybe straight up disappeared pre riot? the ones who r left remember hearing a coupla them speaking german b4 they fucked off. then some of the guards wuz good. lots of the ones who didn't split got teh shit murdered out of them in gross ways. belt strangles, shivs in scandalous places. u should send the families fruit baskets. somethign classy. no melon. the survivors r pretty traumatized & sad about their friends. do not add melon to injury.

prisoners: got their hands on weapons hid all over the place. bathrooms, buttholes, walls, u know. seems likely some extra shit got snuck in or turned a blind eye to. the rioters were in weird shape psychologically. pissed @ the law & imports, but in a way that wuz ramping up kind of maybe unnatural while they were behind bars. dr. chilton needs 2 get them some ketamine therapy. make buttsex not riots.

other weird shit: 1 russian nullifier device found on scene. govt took it. it was totqlly broken anyway.

govt: wont give us surveillance tapes or let us go past the tape & there was tape fucking everywhere

Comments

[brushoff]

You underestimate the investments I've made.

[dun_moch]

Do I? Make me an offer, then.

[brushoff]

[ oh damn ]

250?

[dun_moch]

Add another digit on to that number and we can begin to talk.

[brushoff]

0250

[ Dorian Gray can be a bit of a shit. ]

[dun_moch]

[No lies detected.]

You must not want me to say this word very badly, do you.

[brushoff]

Not that word, no. If I'm paying you to say something stupid in that audiobook narrator voice of yours, it needs to be something STUPID.

[dun_moch]

My voice does not sound like an audiobook narrator.

[He said, shortly before taking a narration job.]

[brushoff]

It really REALLY does. You should be doing commercials.

[dun_moch]

My price becomes higher the longer you insist on these absurdities, Mister Gray.

[brushoff]

I wouldn't call these absurdities. This is banter, pure and simple!

[dun_moch]

I think not. Banter tends to be stimulating and clever. This is merely tiresome.