008. video.

[magnitudes]

G'day g'day, this is Sarissa Theron, local hero and devastatingly good looking rural.

( She seems in a better mood than last time she posted, and better form - and sure, she is, but it's also Sarissa trying very very ahrd to be Okay, and definitely not actually being Okay. Still, there's a healthy flush to her cheeks, and unlike last time she's got a smear of mud on her cheek and is looking like she's been working outside. Wherever she is, she's definitely in a field, and there's a shed nearby. )

I know, two posts from me, in one month? Overkill, definitely. But this is so important. Or, should I say,

( and she grins, brightly, before turning the camera... ) sow important?

( Yes, viewers. In-frame is a very large sow, pink with black patches. Around her are nine little piglets, varied from all pink to speckled to covered in patches, and one that is totally black. )

I just rescued these guys from a bit of a situation. Got them a special shed and I just finished the fences on the fields a couple days ago, so good timing, but I gotta head back into town to pick up some more supplies and that. If anyone has any fruit and veggies or pig feed or straw or - I mean, anything that you wanna donate to the rescue pig extravaganza, lemme know.

( A thumbs up; she is so excited. Pigs!!! ) And I need help coming up with names, because they can't all be Hamlet or Francis Bacon.

Comments

[nastygram]

Wow that sounds super fun but I like having eyebrows

[magnitudes]

Square

[nastygram]

🖕

[nastygram]

Where's this epic mistake happening

[magnitudes]

x o x o

[magnitudes]

at a cinema near you

nah I was thinking mauritia, since you're so over nonah
near that one place with the one thing

[nastygram]

omg that one place w the one thing HAHAHAHAHAH

if you think you're being cute, YOU AREN'T

[magnitudes]

well obviously

no, i was thinking one of the old industrial estates that doesn't get much use anymore
I can pick one and shoot over the address?

[nastygram]

literally I am going to be on hand just to say I TOLD U SO

[magnitudes]

I love it when you talk all condescending to me

[divaricate]

That's understandable. [She nods slightly with a softer smile this time.]

It's honestly just the numbers one through nine in Sokovian -- my native language.

[nastygram]

yeah you do

and I'm not even shaming you for it

[magnitudes]

That would be pretty harsh, even for you, Splinter

[doubleblind]

The one thing they did right.

Man, what is up with all these critics?

[doubleblind]

It can be about both.

[magnitudes]

But I'm being a jerk, Tiger. Kinda ruins the vibe if I start being all accepting.

[oddbod]

You wouldn't have been watching us if you had just left the room.

[oddbod]

For the last time, you could easily just invent the endless pasta bowl yourself. You're asking too much of fake Italians.

[helpline]

[ There's a pause.

Another pause.

A loooonger pause.

And then the Doctor speaks, in a tone of utter horror. ]

It's not even real Italian?

[oddbod]

It was founded in Florida in the 1980s.

[Clara Oswald, crusher of dreams, looked this up online before they even went.]

[helpline]

Was it at least founded by Italians in Florida?

[ the Doctor's petty grudge against Olive Garden begins ]

[helpline]

And done what? You were snogging in the console room, that's the room I need to be in to make things work!

[oddbod]

No, it was founded by some bloke who wanted to make money.

[oddbod]

Take a walk! Meet a nice fisherman! Find a sea monster in the lake! Take your pick.

[helpline]

[ SIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGH ]

Next time we eat somewhere, we need to go somewhere that actually lives up to it's name.