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[immigrantpunk]

ok so question

say you just got here

and everyones all oooohh ahhhhh superheroes and that's cool and all

but you're a) not a superhero and b) FUCKING RUSSIAN

like srsly my blood is at least part vodka thats how russian we're talking here

its kinda weird to drag me to a little room and say you want me to fight the soviets isn't it

like hey just go fight your own people because we say so and also you have powers now????

yeah ok thanks for fucking with my dna i guess WITHOUT MY PERMISSION

anyways none of that was actually a question, oops so here's one

any other russkies out there????? if not thats cool but plz don't look at me like i'm coming for your family

also how do you know if that file that tells you your power isnt bs because i'm looking at it like wtf who considers this a power, can't i have something cool like shooting lasers out of my eyes

maybe theres some mistake??? hahaha that'd mean they'd have to send me home tho right

good luck with that, im sure

ok im out, i have some kind of boat cruise to go to

DOSVEDANYA BITCHES

Comments

[aggressiveapathy]

just make sure the g-string is red
no reason to ruin a perfect theme

these two are destined to be hideous and beautiful together i get the feeling

[immigrantpunk]

you think they sell any around here with the hammer and sickle on it?

friendship truly is magic

[aggressiveapathy]

i have an army of free laborers that could make it happen
but they can't be blamed for the resulting dick punches from the general public

amen to that

[immigrantpunk]

ok that's fair

wait why do you have free laborers, do you run a sweatshop?

[aggressiveapathy]

i'm a monarch

[immigrantpunk]

no shit

how'd you get that gig

[aggressiveapathy]

comes with the superpowers
if you play it right

[immigrantpunk]

noted

[aggressiveapathy]

but you probably don't want the kind super stripping gives you
unless you're also made of penicillin or something

[immigrantpunk]

so what's your power

[aggressiveapathy]

raccoons
and tacos

[immigrantpunk]

those aren't powers, they're random things

[aggressiveapathy]

not the way i use them

[immigrantpunk]

how do you use them

don't leave me hanging here, i have to know

[aggressiveapathy]

a lady doesn't tell
unless the guy tells first

[immigrantpunk]

i show you mine, you show me yours?

[aggressiveapathy]

that's the deal

[immigrantpunk]

ok

according to the file i can sense DANGER

which i'm pretty sure is bs code for nothing

[aggressiveapathy]

Meet me in the park in one hour

We will test

[immigrantpunk]

sorry, someone beat you to it

gotta fess up about the raccoons and tacos tho

[aggressiveapathy]

you're already on the pole somewhere?

[immigrantpunk]

yep

my stage name is randy russky

[aggressiveapathy]

god you're good

[immigrantpunk]

i know

thanks for noticing tho