001; video

[clanky]

[Aaron Stack, singularly most advanced android every made, has Been Through This Shit Before. It wasn’t any more impressive the second time around. He didn’t feel any more inclined to care.

He was going to just wait it out. But he's getting bored, and curious, and suspicious of the quiet. And so-]

At the risk of having a conversation I have had numerous times before, again- I still do not appreciate being repeatedly dragged into your silly fleshcapades. I have no need of your government oversight or blah blah meatsack safety regulations or whatever the thinly veiled justification is this time. Was it the Soviets? Please. If the Soviets are still givig you trouble, there no hope for you at all. And I liked my universe, you know. Danvers' inability to use Google Maps aside, it was fun. Lots of kicking and explosions and things that needed shooting.

But in the spirit of self-interest all you fleshies embrace, I’ve given it some thought and decided I am willing to extend the same offer I made SHIELD. If you can offer me suitable and fulfilling incentive and deliver a reasonably large amount of expensive imported beer on a daily basis, I will once again consider...well, whatever. To start, I want a Life Model Decoy pony this time. You do not get to question why.

[It's because he has a leftover cowboy hat from hunting zombies, mostly. And mostly to see what people think he will do with a pony.]

These are the only terms I will accept.

Comments

video :

[proteus]

Wait, so are you the guy that annexed two shelves in the fridge for beer?

[ If she goes down stairs right now will one shelf be empty... ]

video :

[clanky]

[No. Please. Like that's all the beer Aaron has.]

Until an adequate mini-fridge can be found, yes. Don't touch it.

video :

[proteus]

I don't want your piss water.

[ She can't even drink it, but it's the principal of the thing. ]

[ video ]

[falsesmile]

You may be better suited for bartending than heroics.

[ video ]

[clanky]

I'll admit I gave it some thought, but the ratio of free drinks to lack of interest in empathizing with the people in bars seems to be off. Although anything would be better than selling cars.

[Even insurance was better than that. From experience.]

[ permavid ]

[falsesmile]

It sounds like you have a problem with work, not cars.

[video]

[glitterateur]

We can ask for ponies?

[video]

[clanky]

[...he doesn't entirely have the heart to be awful to a small child. Of course, he doesn't have a heart at all, but semantics.]

...sure. Why not.

[permavid]

[glitterateur]

[This is the greatest day of Mabel's life.]

Yesss.

What are you gonna name him?

permavid!

[heartlessglitch]

Please clarify: What is a Life Model Decoy pony.

omg kouhai

[clanky]

Surely you know what a Life Model Decoy is. Right?

s-senpai...

[heartlessglitch]

Yes.
But I was not aware that S.H.I.E.L.D. produced equine versions.

video

[valr]

You know no one watching this gives a shit, right?

[she just wants to check]

video

[clanky]

Why would I give a shit if they give a shit?

video

[valr]

You cared enough to waste your time with this announcement.

[so........]

video

[boobwindow]

[ No ID printed.

Costumed superheroine staring skeptically into the feed. ]

I can't tell if this is serious or not.

video

[clanky]

I would never joke about work.

[Depending on your definitions of "joke" and "work" though...]

[text; private]

[brokenteam]

[there's a text with the display name 'Alex Baker']

Did SHIELD agree to it?

[that's the most ridiculous list of terms he's ever heard]

[text; private]

[clanky]

[Mike is this really necessary.]

Of course they did. Well, not the pony, I didn't ask for one then.

Video

[walkingballpit]

[Robbie wants to buy a steno pad and write out two columns, sane/normal imPorts and crazy/odd. He's scared of the ratio.]

I'd help with the pony, but I'm stuck back on "fleshcapades". Good job.

Video

[clanky]

[Hello technical instigator of said 'fleshcapades.']

You would know.

[But really, it's not any particular dislike or distaste for him, Robbie, Baldwin, as a person. It's what followed after the tragedy that grinds his gears, so to speak.]

When did you stop flirting with tetanus? ['Cause that was some nasty armor, dude.]

audio;

[databoner]

...Were you always a machine and simply programmed to be this sassy?

audio;

[clanky]

I have always been a machine, and I came this way.

video

[screenplays]

You're non-organic.

[ Way to state the obvious TC. ]

video

[clanky]

[It's not so obvious. He looks more human than he used to.]

Completely. I am a robot.