( video. ) cw: blood and a deeply useless human being

[magnitudes]

( The scene:
Sarissa, with what looks like twisted up kitchen roll shoved up each nostril, the paper bloody. Her nose is puffy, bruised, the skin across the bridge of it and around her eyes looking almost purple, but it hasn’t bowed to either side.

Underneath said tragedy, Sarissa’s mouth is tugged in a wide smile. )

Fuckin’ oath, mates. My sister clocked me good. Can you see this?

( The camera is waved around, to get different angles of her poor nose. ) Bloody legend. I was worried she’d be useless at self-defence, but I take back everything. And she’s driving me to A n’ E.

( She’s in a car, by the way. A nice one. The seats are a deep red leather, and in the driver's seat but considerably less jovial is Sarah. She turns the camera to actually get a shot of Sarah for a couple of seconds before twisting the camera away again. )

It was an accident, we’re good and golden. Lesson learned, but, don’t try to tickle attack Saroula when she’s groggy.

( A sniff, and she makes a little “ow” sort of face that is more comical than sincere. )

Anyway, just wanted to say we’re gonna have a big fuck off barbie at ours, soon. Last part of the summer— or uh, first part of the autumn? And if you happen to also have a homicidal ex-boyfriend who has been ported out for more than a month, then you get to receive a special prize. Like, I dunno. You can take home the bouncy castle, or something. Everyone’s invited, unless I don’t like you, but if you ain’t sure and you got a seal of approval from one of the girls, then you’re good. But everyone bring some food or something, ‘cause I ain’t cooking endless bloody mountains of food when I don’t know how many people are turning up. For one, I'm cheap, and for two, I'm lazy.

( Another little sniff, and Sarissa looks across at Sarah. Dramatically: ) Do you reckon I can still get away with serenadin’ myself in the mirror? You’re beeeeautiful—

( That might just be Sarah’s hand reaching over to try and knock Sarissa’s device out of her hand. )

No, Sarah, you broke my nose, you get to listen to me sing James bloody Blunt, that’s the rules. Maybe Snow Patrol, okay, or Shania, that’s my compromise.

Comments

ONE DAY.... one day the stars will align.... and they will become.... friends.... ish....

[magnitudes]

Ugh, God, really?

( RUBY she wanted to try and BANTER in the spirit of making shit less weird, but suddenly this feels like being spoken down to.

On the other hand, which is where most reasonable might congregate: probably trying to banter with someone when a good portion of your relationship with them has been you being an absolute dick to them probably isn't a solid plan. Whatever, clearly she is in the right and never does anything wrong, ever. That's a fact.)

You gonna wait an hour to lecture me, too, so I can contact one of the six people I know who can lend me a fuck to give?

But will they? But WILL they??

[notsheepish]

[Cool, cool. Cool cool cool cool cool. That wasn't her intention at all, but cool.

Ruby manages to hold back a sigh and keep a mostly neutral expression, but the sigh-that-was is probably pretty obvious in her eyes.]

Nope. No lecture. Just wanted to make sure you two were okay.

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE

[magnitudes]

( That's actually very impressive, given the living thorn-in-sides that is Sarissa. )

If Sarah's okay? My nose is broken. ( And Ruby said you two, not just Sarah but this is a pained little potato chip. Still, she relents: )

Pretty sure Saroula's fine. I need to figure out how to make up tickle attacking her in her sleep to her, but.

Peace? What is it good for?

[notsheepish]

[Ruby just sorta shrugs. These eggshells she suddenly feels like she's walking on seem so very fragile.]

I haven't seen either of you in a while, and the first time I do, there's blood and broken bones involved. Figured I might as well ask.

Anyway, I'm sure you'll think of something for it. Maybe the hospital has a teddy bear with a bandage on its nose?

idk mellow tunes and cute symbols for shirts

[magnitudes]

Yeah, but—

( Yeah but what? )

This was an accident. I tried to tickle attack her when she was sleeping and she got me with her elbow, like a— reactive kinda thing. Arguably I deserved it.

( Still, there's blood staining her shirt, and she shrugs. ) I dunno, I was thinking I could try getting a brain transplant so she has less bullshit to deal with, but apparently those are unethical, or something.

i mean I GUESS

[notsheepish]

Ah. [The explanation earns a raised eyebrow and a vague nod of acknowledgement but no direct comment just yet. Instead, Ruby focuses on that next bit.]

I have heard that's frowned on these days, yeah. Any other ideas?

[magnitudes]

Go fuckin' figure, right?

( Sarissa waits, stretching her arms before her, until her spine crackles. )

Box of choccies and my most compellin' apology, maybe. Or I could hire a local theatre troupe to perform a movin' and inspirational play about the importance of family outside her bedroom window.

[notsheepish]

You know, the first one sounds a little more practical, but then again, it's always good to be a supporter of the arts, right? If you go with the play, are you going to write it yourself?

[magnitudes]

'Course. I'm Greek, I'm pretty that means I should be naturally talented with theatre stuff.

[notsheepish]

Oh, good. I was worried there for a second.

[magnitudes]

Yeah, I can see. You look real torn up.

[notsheepish]

Exactly. Because theater is so important to me.