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[garotted]

So I need a job. I don't do the government thing, and it seems like Magnus has been an open fucking book about who we are, so you may as well know that I'm another dead teenage Viking warrior or whatever he's been telling people.

I'm probably stronger and tougher than you are, and I'm known for kicking ass first and asking questions later, so unless interns battle to the death for their positions here, office-work is probably right out.

I'd rather work for another imPort. I don't have a specific place I'm staying, so I can go anywhere if I have to.


Also, camping supplies stores, anyone know a good one?

Comments

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[dendarii]

...

I've not heard of any dead teenage Viking warriors until just now. In fact, I'm not sure what a Viking is.

[garotted]

You're one of like five then.
A Viking is a warrior from a planet called Asgard. We wear big spiky armor and most of us have laser-swords. We're usually between six and eight feet tall, but I'm on the smaller side and a carry a garotte instead. We ride these things called womprats into battle, but obviously mine isn't here.

text;

[redhott]

omg you guys are vikings??

also hello again :3

[garotted]

No, I was being sarcastic.
We're Norse though, so that's close enough.

Hey. Thanks for lunch the other day.

Re: text;

[fehus]

here's us on our last summer holiday.

[Kyle's met Alex already??????]

Text; UN: D33

[d33tached]

[Oh, good. More dead teenage Viking warriors - this one with a little less charm, it would appear, or at least intrigue.

["Probably stronger and tougher than you are" - oooh, he's shaking in his boots.]

You're a friend of Mr. Chase, then, I take it.

[garotted]

[ hey, it's facts, pal, not an arm-wrestling contest. ]

Woah, buddy, don't throw the f-word around so casually.

[Text] - pls lemme know if you wanna opt out of this awful chatspeak

[versusseeker]

ur ded?

[?!?!?!!??!]

asldkjf no worries

[garotted]

See-through, too.

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[h2no]

YOU KNOW WHAT'S FUNNY ABOUT THIS?
I KNOW MAGNUS BUT HE'S NEVER MENTIONED BEING A DEAD VIKING WARRIOR.

THAT BEING SAID I HOPE YOU DON'T WANT CAMPING SHIT TO LIVE IN THE WOODS PERMANENTLY.

[garotted]

It was only a matter of time. I like to head things like this off at the pass.
Is your caps-lock broken or what?

Re: text

[fehus]

by the way i'm a dead viking warrior.

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[fehus]

[everything about this post, including the casual insults to his intelligence, makes something inside Magnus' chest tighten. it's nice to have Alex around him, again, being abrasive and dynamic and taking charge of every situation]

you can tell you've never written a resume before.

also you didn't need to be an open fucking book if you didn't want to. you could have just been my angry penpal or something.

[garotted]

Wow, and you have? I told everyone what I do well, it's their fault if they expect it to be in bullet-point format. I never promised it.

No, I have to claim you. Odin's warriors sticking together or something, ooh-rah, go team.

text.

[admemoriam]

you know magnus??
he's my cameraman!!!

[garotted]

[ uh. ]

Right, he mentioned something like that.
What, do you have a YouTube channel or something?

Video, private

[pummelgranite]

[ She fumbles with the camera a little, like she turned it on in a hurry. Whoever it is seems to be underground, and backlit by glowing flowers ]

Wait- you're an Einherjar? Like, uh- work for the Valkyries.

text, private

[garotted]

Uh yes and no. Yes, einherji, no on the Valkyries. We work for Odin. We are, however, chosen by the Valkyries, so there's that.

[bespin]

If you're as strong as Magnus, I could use you for my moving company. Unless you've got something against lifting furniture?

[garotted]

[ ok but more importantly: ] Is your name for real?

[txt]

[pigmypouter]

Magnus is pretty cool so

I work at a crystal shop, they're looking for someone to work some other shifts???? It's not mine though, I'm just a minimum wage slave.

[garotted]

Don't tell him he's cool, I'll never hear the end of it.

Retail hell, huh? Do you like it?

text,

[wingsit]

I can't help at all but I do want to say hello and it's nice to meet you

[garotted]

So you're Nill, huh? Magnus told me about you.
He hasn't been too embarrassing, has he?

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[am_i_a_monster]

You're not dead here, are you? The porter brings us all back to life when we get here.

[garotted]

Still pretty dead the way I was dead in Valhalla, I think. Not really sure I wanna die to test it, though, since this is Midgard.

[songwrite]

are u like a demigod too??

[garotted]

I am, in fact, like a demigod too.