Odin (Owain) | Fire Emblem (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
shadowglitter) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
maskormenace2017-11-02 12:51 pm
shadowglitter) wrote in maskormenace2017-11-02 12:51 pm
video. space time
Hey, it's me! ODIN DARK. [ he puts his hand over his face, shielding the world from the madness that stirs within him. ] When you were a child, were you ever afraid of... the Dark? Gehehuhuhuahahaha.
So, if you can't tell from the billboards of my face hung up all around in basically every city, I'm gonna be on TV! I'm a contestant on that space thing! Which is great because I deserve it more than anyone and I'm really funny and cool and smart and good looking and I'm gonna be naked and lighting things on fire and getting into fist fights and throwing drinks into people's faces like all the time so that everybody gives me attention and votes to keep me around or whatever. Get pumped! But also: I have some games we can play to celebrate? Consider this the second episode of my vlog I guess.
Game one: which of these are you? [ he holds his camera up to rEVEAL A WEREWOLF NAME QUIZ. he gives you about 2 seconds to look at the print out before he's moving on. ]
Game two: not actually a game! Tell me about things you want to see people do on TV so that I can do it. Literally anything. I'm not kidding. I'm going to be in space and I'm telling you right now I will literally do anything you tell me to do if it'll get me the attention I so sorely crave. Actually I guess this is the game in that whoever gives me the most ludicrous assignment wins? Haha. This feeling in my veins - what I once thought to be umbral, soulrendering dread - I now recognize as just super fun excitement.
Game three: TELL ME A SECRET ABOUT ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS SO I CAN SHOUT IT REALLY LOUDLY ON NATIONAL TV. Such an advanced spell... I truly am an excellent sorcerer.
THAT'S IT.
So, if you can't tell from the billboards of my face hung up all around in basically every city, I'm gonna be on TV! I'm a contestant on that space thing! Which is great because I deserve it more than anyone and I'm really funny and cool and smart and good looking and I'm gonna be naked and lighting things on fire and getting into fist fights and throwing drinks into people's faces like all the time so that everybody gives me attention and votes to keep me around or whatever. Get pumped! But also: I have some games we can play to celebrate? Consider this the second episode of my vlog I guess.
Game one: which of these are you? [ he holds his camera up to rEVEAL A WEREWOLF NAME QUIZ. he gives you about 2 seconds to look at the print out before he's moving on. ]
Game two: not actually a game! Tell me about things you want to see people do on TV so that I can do it. Literally anything. I'm not kidding. I'm going to be in space and I'm telling you right now I will literally do anything you tell me to do if it'll get me the attention I so sorely crave. Actually I guess this is the game in that whoever gives me the most ludicrous assignment wins? Haha. This feeling in my veins - what I once thought to be umbral, soulrendering dread - I now recognize as just super fun excitement.
Game three: TELL ME A SECRET ABOUT ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS SO I CAN SHOUT IT REALLY LOUDLY ON NATIONAL TV. Such an advanced spell... I truly am an excellent sorcerer.
THAT'S IT.
no subject
like they are
but RESPECT, hon
anyway idk it sounds you are PRETTY comfy w the d
maybe i should leave the ~ intimacy ~ up to u cockwhisperer
my steeze is more of the stepping on variety
no subject
Understood.
I will whisper at his cock in your stead.
But,
Please at least step on him or break him in half.
He told me at great lengths about how he would be into that.
I analyzed him psychologically and we had a very nice conversation about who he is as a person.
If you stepping on him would contribute to my relationship with him flourishing, I insist that you break those bones with due diligence.
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thnx for tag teaming on this
super relief that I don't have to talk about feelings
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I LOVE talking about feelings. Especially ones like yours!
"Look at me, I'm abrasive and keep Peter at a distance because my particular brand of dealing with the soft yet emotionally grand love I feel towards him is defined by its defensiveness." That's you, probably.
Or you're just a libertine young woman who prefers the soft and subtle convex of nerd-flesh beneath your heel over the complicated vulnerabilities that come with opening yourself up to a person. I don't know. I don't know you.
But my point is if you've got a big big big big crush on him we can focus on that like right now.
no subject
not what I am here for
the only big big big big crush you need to consider is the one where I will big time crush your balls if you keep going w this
so please don't speculate on any of my shit
no subject
You are a disappointing human being, in almost every respect.
BUT I HAVE ACKNOWLEDGED YOUR BOUNDARIES, O PRINCESS.
THE WALLS AROUND THIS CONVERSATORIAL ARENA HAVE BEEN SETIFIED.
I still want you and him to kiss but if it's not your jam then ok.
He is pretty unkissable so I get it.
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kissing =/= talking about feelings tho
been there done that will do again
so chill out
no subject
I don't know.
I don't know how far your relationship has progressed.
I want you to progress it further after speaking with me, so that I may be thanked by Peter Maximoff.
If you're not willing to be ankle-deep in his butt or to talk about your feelings with him or whatever,
Can you like
Slap him?
Have you slapped him yet?
no subject
tbh u r vibing to me as more slappable
BUT idk dude
dumped coffee on him
is that up to your standards or
no subject
But I would not get the same emotional and sexual pleasure from your slaps that Peter woild, so please stay in your lane.
No.
Wow, that's bad.
I can't believe I used to think you were funny.
no subject
dickhead
protip why don't you go fall in a hole and see if that brings u some lols and ~~~ sexual pleasure
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Well, hey.
I used to, before you let me down.
I'm sure you can climb that ladder again.
no subject
new goals ππππ
but how can i if u r going 2 space
no subject
Oh. Oh! I know.
Campaign for me.
Make sure everyone watching the show likes me more than they like stupid ugly Peter and his stupid ugly face.
And everyone else, too.
The rest of them suck. God, I'm literally the only person going to space who isn't complete fucking garbage.
I'm not HERE TO MAKE FRIENDS!!!!!!!
no subject
π ]
omg lol
okkkk
but how will that convince you i'm funny idgi
no subject
What are you talking about?
[ he's already forgotten darlene isn't just asking how to win his favor or make him like her. ]
no subject
lolllllllll
u r funny
that's going to sell soooooo well on bwinstagram or wtfever
don't worry hoss i'll get your hashtag going
no subject
That and fuck Peter. Did we settle anywhere on that?
Give him a handjob, at least. I got one on a magic carpet way above the city so I don't feel threatened about him also getting one.
This I vow, as his friend, by the sacred stones.
I'm going now.
Bye.