[Video]

[attractedtodarkness]

[One teenage girl with long brown hair draped down the sides of her face is staring at her new phone incredulously. Her tone one of disbelief and sarcasm.]

"Don't worry, we're the [Insert air quotes here] 'good guys'"? Seriously? Talk about mega government conspiracies. I'm not buying any of that bullshit.

[There's a pause as she reaches for something off camera]

First thing's first, if anyone has a lighter I can borrow, I want to burn the shit out of this file. [she waves the back of her personnel file in front of the camera briefly] I don't know how they got my information but I'm not about to share it. And if someone can lend me enough cash for a flight to Los Angeles, it'll be great.

[she turns away from the phone, seemingly about to end her message before turning back]

Oh, right. If you're my roommate, I only have one rule: Don't touch my stuff.

Comments

[attractedtodarkness]

Just checking. You sound like my dad when he talks to his patients.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Your dad was a psychiatrist? So you're likely fairly versed in the professional lexicon?

[Father issues. Check.]

[attractedtodarkness]

[Hey now. Psychoanalyzing someone you just met is rude]

I know enough of his bullshit.

[slightlyoffchilt]

[And Chilton is so rude, he's edible.]

I see. [Spoken with an elongated enunciation on see.] Have you been to therapy yourself, in addition?

[The height of rudeness, right here.]

[attractedtodarkness]

[This will be a joy]

Ever heard of doctor-patient confidentiality, asshole?

[slightlyoffchilt]

[Literally the third person to call him an asshole.]

Doesn't necessarily apply transuniversally, does it? At the very least, there's no precedent in my world.

[attractedtodarkness]

[He's on a roll]

Does none of your business apply?

[slightlyoffchilt]

[Going for a record, this guy.]

How can it not be my business? We're part of the same community now, what if you have something more than mere tendencies towards pyromania?

[attractedtodarkness]

Then you'll just have to deal with it like everyone else.

[slightlyoffchilt]

That is hardly comforting.

[A beat.]

Are you at least satisfied with whatever responsibility our governmental hosts gave to you?

[attractedtodarkness]

Of course not. I didn't ask to be here.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Not going to make the best of a foul situation?

[attractedtodarkness]

Nope.

[slightlyoffchilt]

That doesn't sound very proactive of you. But I'm sure you hear that frequently?

[attractedtodarkness]

Fuck off.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Already leaping to defensive measures?

[attractedtodarkness]

Yep. Now how about you go bother someone else?

[slightlyoffchilt]

But you've already caught my interest now. And my current patients are engaged in group therapy.

[attractedtodarkness]

[here is a very charming response that consists entirely of her flipping the camera the bird.]

[slightlyoffchilt]

Oh, very nice. I can tell you've had a lot of practice.

[attractedtodarkness]

Leave me alone.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I'm not immune to propriety. Maybe if you ask nicely.

[attractedtodarkness]

That's rich coming from a douchebag.

[slightlyoffchilt]

Crude language is a common defensive mechanism.

[attractedtodarkness]

Psychoanalyzing people who aren't your patients makes you a dick. Are we done stating the obvious?