VIDEO | 04

[patchricide]

[As the camera turns on, your eyes are immediately directed towards a massive pile of leftover Halloween candy spread out over a table. At least, most of it is Halloween candy, and some of it is really good, like those peanut butter cups and little candy-coated morsels. But there's not a lot of quality control here, so some of it is terrible Halloween candy, and some upon further inspection is not Halloween candy at all.]

[In fact, there's some Christmas candies as well, including those really good hazlenut chocolates, and a few peppermints. There's also some of those mysterious strawberry hard candies that old ladies keep in candy bowls, tiny boxes of raisins, and... cough drops? Yup, those are cough drops. At the edge of the screen, a pair of mouse are helping themselves to one of the oddities, a small bag of peanuts like you might find on an airline.]

[And then there's Allura, sitting at the table with a pout of discontent on her face. After all, she had been invited to a Halloween party at the last minute, and she didn't have roommates to stay home on Halloween, so...]

If I had known I wasn't going to be handing out any Halloween candy, I would never have bought so much.

Particularly since I can't feed most of this to my mice. [As if on cue, a bigger, chubby yellow mouse picks up a bag of sour gummies and starts inspecting it — and without looking, Allura reaches over and pulls the bag out of his tiny little paws.] In fact, some of it I'm not sure if I ought to be eating.

This one is made with boiled animal bones, and coated in dried, powdered acid. It's supposed to be so sour that you will start crying in pain. Is this actually supposed to be a 'treat'?

[She gives a long sigh.] What am I supposed to do with all this? No matter how dubious the ingredients are, it seems like such a waste to throw it all away...

Comments

[patchricide]

Why, what's wrong with cherry? I've had cherries, and I thought they tasted fine.

It hadn't crossed my mind until Pidge brought up the possibility, but... why not have a full team of Paladins here at one time? Imagine what good we could do with Voltron.

... granted... it would be a significantly smaller Voltron, but it should still be quite powerful!

[lasersounds]

Nothing is wrong with cherries, it's the fact that no one can get the flavor right when trying with candy.

...You have a point. It doesn't make a lot of sense to not have the whole team here. But some people don't think the Porter really has a rhyme or reason to how it brings people in...

[patchricide]

Wouldn't you simply add cherries?

[She looks alarmed and confused. How many lies does this pile of candy hide?]

Random chance would explain it, but the explanations about the Porter sounded as though there was at least a sense of purpose. Perhaps it's more of an art than a science?

[lasersounds]

Ah. No. It's called artificial flavoring, Allura.

[So many lies. So many.]

Maybe? One heck of a performance art piece though. Wonder if we could ask for the others as a Christmas gift...

[patchricide]

But why would they do that? What's wrong with actual flavoring?

[she came out here to have a good holiday and she's feeling so attacked right now]

Getting one would be a nice start. Asking for everyone at once might be a problem, since everyone must have friends and family they would like to bring here...

[lasersounds]

Nothing? But sometimes they don't work in every treat you want to taste like something so we...try to recreate it?

[L O O K. He doesn't know how artificial flavors work. He's bsing all of this.]

You have a point. But maybe we could ask for everyone but say that just one is an ok place to start? Otherwise, we'd be playing favorites with who we ask for first...

[patchricide]

That almost makes sense, but... I don't know. Somehow, the labels feel so dishonest now.

[next you'll tell her she will never get to taste a fresh blue raspberry]

Maybe. I don't believe they would necessarily be offended by it, assuming we even brought it up with them. But I'm not sure I could stand the thought of hurting them over this.

Besides, if the Porter is going to be so partial about all this, it might be beneficial to give up the final choice as well.

[lasersounds]

Welcome to capitalism at it's finest?

[Have you ever really looked into "organic" foods?]

This is assuming the Porter has any reason to listen to us in the first place. Whatever, I'm hoping we see some of the others here in the next few months. Or we end up back home, collectively.

[patchricide]

It sounds as though your kind learned some Unilu tricks along the way...

[does that mean the others are synthetic foods???]

That is the problem, isn't it. We likely wouldn't be separated in the first place if the Porter was known for generosity. [She gives a small huff, and continues.] Being in this sort of 'hub' would open up untold possibilities, too.

[lasersounds]

You know, some people think that aliens helped with the founding of civilization on earth. Like...builders of pyramids and whatever. It wouldn't surprise me if the Unilu had been here.

[Let's not introduce her to the concept of "organic" anything.]

I honestly don't like the odds with any scenarios that start and/or end here. The Porter has caused enough trouble, too much trouble for me to trust it anyway.

[patchricide]

It's difficult to imagine an Unilu doing that much manual labor. Though they might have sold early humanity the designs, perhaps...

Still, just consider if there was a way to change this scenario to remove the Porter from the equation. If we could collaborate with other universes in keeping all of them safe. An open exchange, of sorts.