נσнη cσηѕ†αηтιηє (
constantdick) wrote in
maskormenace2019-07-09 11:43 am
Entry tags:
- abigail hobbs | n/a,
- anakin skywalker | darth vader,
- andy | n/a,
- catra | n/a,
- elena fisher | n/a,
- harry dresden | the magician,
- john constantine | con man,
- jonathan walsh | snake man,
- katie 'pidge' holt | the green paladin,
- lucifer morningstar | the devil,
- mollymauk tealeaf | n/a,
- nikolai | silver,
- ronan lynch | greywaren,
- ruby nakamura | candlelight,
- sabrina spellman | n/a,
- tohru adachi | n/a,
- wanda maximoff | scarlet witch,
- † eli vanto | ensign,
- † n/a | the outsider,
- † selina kyle | catwoman,
- † vanya hargreeves | the white violin
video; open
[Video]
[Hey imPort network, here's a skinny Brit in a trenchcoat who looks a bit like Sting, if Sting were inclined to go without shaving, sleeping or changing his clothes for days at a time. He starts out by muttering a few words under his breath, apparently having a minor issue with the comm device.] Bloody phones.
[He lights a cigarette, letting it dangle from his lips and talking around it, his accent of Liverpool mostly, with a couple of other influences and very working class.]
Right then. My name's John Constantine and I'm new 'ereabouts. [He holds a business card up to the screen.] There, that pretty much covers everything; consider it both an FYI and an advert.
So, I find myself in need of doing a bit of shopping, yeah? Where's a good place to go when you get low on certain... uh, necessities?
[He pauses for a second, so as to give everyone an opportunity to use their imaginations as to what that might imply. Kinky sex toys? You wish.]
I've got a list 'ere of the most important items; namely, possum tails, frog testes, newt spleens, gnat 'eads, baboon earwax, bat urine, spider eggs, caterpillar pus, lizard brains, leeches, slug slime, unicorn bile and cannabis. Gotta replenish the old apothecary when you can, because you never know when you might need to whip up some artificial musk of a female minotaur, eh? Cheers.
[Hey imPort network, here's a skinny Brit in a trenchcoat who looks a bit like Sting, if Sting were inclined to go without shaving, sleeping or changing his clothes for days at a time. He starts out by muttering a few words under his breath, apparently having a minor issue with the comm device.] Bloody phones.
[He lights a cigarette, letting it dangle from his lips and talking around it, his accent of Liverpool mostly, with a couple of other influences and very working class.]
Right then. My name's John Constantine and I'm new 'ereabouts. [He holds a business card up to the screen.] There, that pretty much covers everything; consider it both an FYI and an advert.
So, I find myself in need of doing a bit of shopping, yeah? Where's a good place to go when you get low on certain... uh, necessities?
[He pauses for a second, so as to give everyone an opportunity to use their imaginations as to what that might imply. Kinky sex toys? You wish.]
I've got a list 'ere of the most important items; namely, possum tails, frog testes, newt spleens, gnat 'eads, baboon earwax, bat urine, spider eggs, caterpillar pus, lizard brains, leeches, slug slime, unicorn bile and cannabis. Gotta replenish the old apothecary when you can, because you never know when you might need to whip up some artificial musk of a female minotaur, eh? Cheers.

[video]
I’ve seen some possums around the park in Maurtia Falls, and I know there are frogs in that same park. If you head to Jeopardy you can probably steal some spider eggs from the church there, they have a spider-goddess cult. As for most of the items on your shopping list? [A shrug.] There aren’t many apothecaries around, and very few of them cater to wizards.
But as for cannabis, I know a dealer or two.
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I'll you what, mate—any interest in earning a little cash? Because I'll pay you whatever the going hunting and gathering rate is in these parts.
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[ video ] » ID: Wanda Maximoff
[ Yeah she's gonna spill those beans to him right off the bat. She's been here long enough to know that people return as different versions of themselves, including younger versions, versions from different worlds, etc. There'd probably be a lot more "bloody hell"s and the like if he remembered being here before, too.
Thanks to her own time here and trips back home, she's now got the appearance of someone in her early thirties, and her voice is still with a Sokovian accent. Eastern Europe, to be regionally specific. ]
And you even kept your unfair levels of attractiveness.
[ PRIORITIES: She has them. Even though he also doesn't remember that time they made out here ... and then her AU-son teleported into his apartment to give him a lecture on making out with him mom. Which, that may be for the best.
Anyway... ]
I can help with the cannabis. Everything else on the list isn't stuff I need for my magic arsenal. Not that cannabis is something I need for my magic, either; that's just for getting high with.
[ her reply is just proof her levels of no shame
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
she left all her shame like two years ago here; she's seen too much shit in three and a half years here to give much of a fuck any more. ]
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...you're saying I've been 'ere before?
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( text | un: wardwell )
Are demons so common?
video;
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You're an exorcist?
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not here
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Video
[Yes, he knows this guy doesn't mean lizard person brains. It's still weird. Actually, the whole list is weird.]
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Looking a bit green there, mate.
[speaking of weird]
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video
I can get you some unicorn bile.
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[Besides someone who has access to the internal organs of magical creatures, that is.]
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You spend 'alf your life studying it and the other 'alf trying to avoid getting yourself killed.
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[Video] 1/2
[Video] 2/2
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Text
video still
[Nope, he doesn't want to know why you easily have a lot of bat piss, kid.]
text
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not here
video
Hi, Sabrina Spellman. You've studied Demonology?
[ Pause. ]
I know a good place to collect spider eggs.
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Yeah, you could say that.
If you're going to suggest the spider goddess cult in Nevada, save your breath there.
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Video
I can't help with much of that, except telling you a few areas with a lot of gnats. Well, I might be able to help with finding the bugs in general, but that's less 'I can tell you right now' and more 'here are the GPS coordinates of a bunch of caterpillars I just found'.
That said, anyone give you the imPort-made FAQ yet?
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I'll pay yeh if you collect some for me.
[basically]
Can't say as they 'ave, no.
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[For demons though, not gnat heads.]
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How are you going to...keep all that?
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video;
I'm surprised you don't call yourself a witch.
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Warlock, as a rule.
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[yeah, bugger that]
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I can supply most of it from my own stocks. I head out on harvesting missions once a month or so, as well, to get most of it, if you ever want to come along and see the places themselves.
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[As it's not like these items have too many other uses.]
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[Video]
[ Wow, this has been one helluva bunch of weirdos popping up recently. Who gave the Porter weed? ]
I guess others are helpin' you out with that, but uh... you do realize that if it's a demon, it's probably one of the good guys that came through the Porter too, right?
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You speaking of someone specific, mate?
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[ID: Selina Kyle] VOICE ▸
video;
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video;
[It speeds through a lot of unnecessary questions.]
Not sure which witches would have the best stashes, so I can't help you with your shopping list, sorry.
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Looks like I've got that well in 'and mate, no worries.
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video;
[She squints.]
You said John Constantine, right?
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That's right. Who's asking?
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