maskormenace | three. video. id: the Outsider. later tonight.

three. video. id: the Outsider. later tonight.

[ It's traditional, when asking simple, broad questions to the Network to do so in a text post but that's not nearly melodramatic enough for the Outsider.

He's in the desert in the outskirts of Jeopardy, night has fallen and he's looking not at the communicator but up at the stars. There's some faeries nearby he's bribed to leave him alone with pizza, but they make it cold enough you can see his breath glittering on the air. ]

The places you come from are varied, where even the things that you take for granted may be different here, or for other imPorts. Even this reality is changing week to week.

With that in mind, I have a question for you.

[ Now he turns to look at the comm, eyes empty and black. He tilts his head. ]

What do you think makes a god a god?

(( And regular reminder that if you respond with video, you are completely free to include a vision for him to see if you want! ))

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You seem like a right prick but I'll give you that you've managed one of the best definitions of Godhood I've heard from a human.

I am 100% a prick!

In fact, you're a demon, right?

Because I am totally putting that on my resume. Great character reference.

"A demon called me a prick once," it does have a nice ring to it I suppose.

Just don't let it go to your head. At least you can admit there are things you can't understand.

[ Unlike some of the assholes on this post, yeesh. ]

It really does. You could make up little badges or cards and hand them out. 'Congratulations, I'm a demon and I think you're a prick.'

Well, I have no idea how Dick Lady got the energy to get us here, so pretending I understand everything would just be a sign that I'm really, really stupid. And I'm not. I'm just really stupid. I draw the line at two reallys. That's 'needs the warning not to smoke at a gas station' stupid.

Not a bad idea, really. I mean, at the very least I might not have to do the whole "I'm a demon" spiel as often.

Do you have to do it often? I just figured you know, you said it, and it's about 900th on my list of 'things I should have questions about' in this situation.

I keep having to repeat myself. And even here, you'd be surprised at how many people don't believe me.

Yeah, because you're the unbelievable thing about this situation.

As opposed to say, appreciating the head's up and making a note to not make deals with you.

Exactly!

Though, I don't usually make bargains. Humans are so bad about keeping up their end of a deal.

You know, I never thought about it, but you are so right.

Like sure, you'd get a soul, but you already have billions of those. So at this point wouldn't it be like us going 'yeah, I reneged, but here, have an AOL Trial disk?'

Especially if you were promised something cool like a fun war or something.

Humans are plenty good at walking themselves right into Hell, there's no reason for me to inconvenience myself over it.

Also, wars are never fun.

Good point. Why do more work than you have to?

Not your brand of misery?

[ Marco thinks about it, he hasn't gone to Church since his Mom 'died' and he's an atheist, so he's not super up on his religion. ]

Honestly I never got why demons or angels hung out in Hell and Heaven if they could be on Earth. Heaven wouldn't have any interesting people and Hell wouldn't have any good food. Both those options suck, aka why I'm no longer Catholic.

I've never been particularly interested in misery. Oh, I don't mind pissing people off - do it on a large enough scale and it's bound to impress Downstairs. But just murdering them en masse is neither enjoyable, nor productive.

[ Someone please stop him. ]

Most angels and demons don't really have a choice. I got lucky, and I've been able to live on Earth for... all of human history. I agree that Earth is much better than either of the alternatives.

Okay, but pissing people off is just fun, especially when they can't say anything about it. I beg to differ on productive, but you know, different goals and all that. I can understand it wouldn't much matter to you when people died.

[ Why? Marco is thoroughly enjoying this conversation. XD ]

How would that work, exactly? The lack of a choice thing. Angels, I get. Unquestioning obedience is one of their 'virtues'.

[ He uses finger quotes to make it clear what he thinks of considering that a virtue. ]

Demons, though? I mean, your whole thing is you didn't do what God told you to. So why do what Lucy tells you to?

[ Something occurs to Marco. ]

Hey, I wonder how many yous there are.

Hypocritical, isn't it? Going to Hell for rebelling and then expected to follow all of Satan's arbitrary rules.

[ Crowley will never pretend otherwise. ]

How many mes? There are about ten million demons in my world. If that's what you mean.

Meet the new boss, same as the old boss?

No, you like you.

[ Marco peeks at the name.]

How many Crowleys. This whole timeline thing. Timelines differ in part because different decisions are made. And probably some quantum stuff about which particles pop in and out and whatever. But if demons and angels don't have free will, or just have less than people, then there'd be less possibilities so there's be fewer iterations of them.

So if you really didn't have any free will, either there'd only be one you across all your possible timelines or every one of you would be exactly the same and make exactly the same choices.

Oh, I definitely have free will. If I didn't, I wouldn't have just quit my job back home.

[ So. ]

Yeah, but earlier, you said that demons and angels didn't have choices.

Normally I'd assume you were lying, since you are a demon, but that is a stupid thing to lie about and telling the truth until you need to lie is the best way to lie, which you would also know.

They don't have choices in the way that a human in a dead-end job doesn't have choices. What else are we supposed to do, aside from what we're told?

And most are idiots with no imaginations, to boot.

Uh, bail?

Make a not-Hell and not-Heaven place somewhere that you guys can chill?

Tell humans what's going on and get a rebellion part ii going on? We hate authority.

I've never met any other demon who had any interest in humans or Earth or any of that rot. And only one angel. Me and him did bail.

Good for you. You should throw a freedom party.

[ Crowley grins. ]

Oh, we did.

[ Marco gives him a thumbs up ]

Excellent.

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three. video. id: the Outsider. later tonight.

i'm sorry

no i love him <3

:3

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