first star to the right

[unhand]

[There's a pirate leaning in far too close to the camera and blinking a lot. Then he frowns and moves it back a little. He spends a little too long staring at it and frowning before finally deciding it's good. Does he realize it's recording already? It's unclear. But when he finally decides to talk, he doesn't push anything. He just smiles, nodding towards the camera.]

Evening. I'm Captain Hook. And I have a question for our esteemed overseers. Specifically, those jocular miscreants in charge of employment.

[He lifts his hook. There are bits of wire and clockwork dangling from it. Clearly the remains of what used to be a clock of some sort. It's dead now.]

Don't misunderstand me, I'm rather dextrous with my hook, but even I have my limits. Really, clockmaking? I can hardly think of any tasks I'd be more ill-suited to perform.

Honestly, weren't there any opportunities for sea-faring careers?

Comments

[wanttobeahero]

[ Henry is just...amused, and not hiding the smirk on his face. It's nice to see Hook here, at least. ]

Maybe they just...thought it'd be good for you. I'm sure they knew what they were doing.

[ He's definitely just teasing and having fun, he can't help it. ]

[unhand]

Maybe they want to feel what else I can do with my hook.

[Killian raises an eyebrow, but he mostly looks amused. It's nice to see Henry again.]

Wondered when you'd show your face, lad. How are you faring here?

voice;

[slightlyoffchilt]

Clockmaking.

[To his credit, he's not laughing. Not explicitly.]

You might be able to request a reassignment, if you'd like to be off the... Hook.

voice;

[unhand]

[Hook, on the other hand (heh), does not look amused.]

How long did it take you to come up with that one?

[proteus]

Bartender on one of those day cruises for middle-aged spinsters that like to play grab ass.

[unhand]

I'd rather steer the ship than steer the lustful urges of spinsters, actually.

audio/

[debauchewy]

Could I see how you wield your hook?

audio/

[unhand]

If you watch me long enough, you'll hardly be able to avoid seeing.

video/

[bulwank]

Most likely because they prefer us to stay in country and inharbor. Giving us a ship or placing us on one makes it difficult to keep track of us.

video/

[unhand]

Good thing I couldn't care less what they prefer. [He tosses the clock behind him.]

[hoboagogo]

Equal-opportunity and all that, I guess.

[Sh...rug.]

What sort've job were you hoping for?

[unhand]

This isn't an opportunity I'd ever asked for.

...my experience until now has mostly been in piracy.

voice.

[uncurse]

[ Oh good lord Jesus in heaven. Emma is sinking down and scrubbing a hand over her face from behind the comfortable curtain of voice. ]

Did you register at the swear-in?

voice.

[unhand]

Of course not. [Hook sounds surprised this is even a question.] Why, you didn't, did you?

voice.

[bioshift]

I dunno, a hook could be handy for clock-work, couldn't it? Does it have to be little clocks?

[ M'gann you. No. Stop. ]

voice.

[unhand]

[There's a silence. He's trying to figure out if she's joking.]

I don't particularly wish it to be clocks at all.

video.

[ex_question191]

[ is this more or less weird than batman?? we just don't know. ]

Pretty sure piracy these days is mostly online, uh, Captain.

video.

[unhand]

[Luckily, he's already heard the internet joke and understands that it's not robbing people waiting in line or anything like that. He still looks generally confused by the concept.]

I don't understand how that would be possible. This internet contains no water, does it?

[darkspider]

Just a bit of advice: Don't call yourself something stupid like "Captain Hook."

[But since he is, Kaine can actually get their twisted sense of humor this time, so he goes on to ask:]

And have you had a lot of trouble with clocks?

[unhand]

Stupid? It's been a good name for the past few centuries. I see no reason to stop using it.

[He shrugs a shoulder, looking down at the mangled clock on his hook.]

...I had a great deal of trouble with this one.

text;

[infomodder]

[thank FUCK he won't have to deal with clocks, he's had enough of clocks, clocks are awful]

You can do that to my clock, too. [The clock that's been stored away in his dresser ever since he saw it came with repairs. Too bad he's not there right now to just slide it on in, here, clockwrecker, go wild.] I've got some contacts with the sea-faring crowd in Heropa if you really want a job out on the water. I'm sure they'd be willing to cooperate.

[Who doesn't want a guy with an actual hook hand being the captain of a tour boat that has a pirate theme? If Hook is willing to cooperate, well. It's better than nothing, isn't it?]

text;

[unhand]

I five want to so antihistamine with your clock. Hoe do tit naje the words on this device?

[So it's possible texting the technologically impaired pirate was not the greatest plan.]

[khajidont]

[Oh my god, Captain Hook. He was talking to Captain Hook about wisdom teeth! That's so weird!]

You're outta luck if you want anything seriously sea-faring. You might be able to go off and be a fisherman, or maybe do some tiny cruises or something, but you're not gonna be allowed to leave US borders. None of us are.

[unhand]

Then it's a good thing I don't much care what I'm allowed to do.

[Pirate life.]

voice;

[motherboxes]

Captain Hook? [Seriously? Really? That gets an eyebrow raise, but Brenda manages not to say anything else more sarcastic or teasing. Somehow.]

Um, yeah. Clockmaking might be a bit of a challenge with just one hand and....a hook. But we're kind of limited on the travel front here, being imPorts and all unless they specifically send us off on missions or as a reward from what I hear so. I'm not sure you'll have much luck on that. Sorry.

voice;

[unhand]

I'm not one of their little registered heroes. I doubt very much they'll be sending me to do anything.

text

[tumultuously]

I thought the whole point of pirates was that you did your own thing.

text

[unhand]

[Oh no not texting again. Hook can't do that.]

Litigate till have to ear.

video;

[parallels]

Think it's supposed to be ironic.

You know. With the whole crocodile thing.

video;

[unhand]

...what do crocodiles have to do with clocks?

video;

[fishhumanalien]

[Don't mind one pale-haired, purple-eyed young man here. He's just. You know. Staring in gap-mouthed excitement.]

WHooOOaaAOAA!

It's a hook! It's a hook! You could catch so many fish with that! So many!

video;

[unhand]

[Oh. He minds.]

...that's not really how fishing works.

video

[foreshadower]

Perhaps you could find something a little closer to your expertise? You hardly have to stay.

[ There's a laugh. ]

It's a bit ironic, isn't it?

video

[unhand]

Putting a one-handed man to work fixing clocks? I haven't stopped laughing yet.

[darwinatrix]

Naval captain, not military captain, I'm guessing?

[unhand]

Aye. [He was in the Navy once, but he never reached Captain. Not before defecting.] I sailed the Jolly Roger.