maskormenace | text - be gay do crimes

mind is empty wait i don't want to shit myself what kind of people do you know

Not the people I know fella but the way I drive sometimes

[ But that's not really the point he's making. ]

Driving clears my head

well i wouldn't hate hanging out with you and i'm sure you'd love mightyena in the front seat, so why not

I've missed that good boy. But if it's just you ain't gonna be disappointed either way

[ And even if he is excited at the prospect of having Mightyena riding shotgun, it's not really why he's offering to take Archie on a drive. ]

nah double date huh where will you pick me up

My cars in heropa but that don't mean much. Question is where do you want picking up from

currently down at the bottom of the ocean can you get down here

Left my sub back at home mate. Was thinking somewhere on actual land

ok ok mr man heropa beach carpark

[ Some time later, Bob's pulling up at the car park, red car looking very much like it's been freshly washed. On his lap there's a scrappy-looking small dog, also looking freshly washed. ]

Arch! Alright, fella?

[ It's not immediately clear who wants to be leaning out of the open window more - Bob or the dog. ]

[archie isn't quite soaked anymore as he staggers over to bob's car. mightyena follows, putting his paws up on the door to sniff and lick at the new friend.]

Aye! I'm livin'. Yourself?

Yeah, yeah. Good. It's good to see you, mate.

[ And it is, but his attention is quickly snagged by Mightyena at his open window, the small dog on his lap wagging its stubby tail like he just met his new best friend. ]

Ready to roll?

As always.

[he pops the passenger side door open, letting mightyena jump in and wriggle into the backseat before he plops his ass in himself.]

Nice day for a change...

Hold him, wouldya?

[ It's all the warning Archie gets before Bob's gently dumping the small, excitable dog in his lap. Can't drive and be distracted by cute dogs at the same time. He's reckless but not that dumb. Firing the car's engine up, he pulls away and throws a doting sort of smile in the little dog's direction. ]

Say hello, Ozzy.

[ So much for not getting distracted. ]

[he doesn't seem bothered to receive this wiggly cargo. archie holds ozzy with all the care one might expect of someone who's used to dealing with excitable little dogs. hell, when mightyena was a puppy, his Bite could probably take off a chunk of the car door! pokémon, man.]

After that singer, aye?

Yeah, yeah. Maybe? Dunno, he already had that name when I picked him up. Just looking after him for a bit.

[ Shrugging an easy shoulder, his eyes drift back to the road because totalling this car isn't something he's really interested in.

For his part, Ozzy seems more interested in giving Archie a slobbery facial with his tongue. ]

Where'd you get Mighty's name from, anyway?

Ah. Went with fostering?

[that's fair enough. archie runs his hands over the excitable little gremlin.]

It's his species name. Mightyena. Evolves from Poochyena. [........ yeah he essentially calls his dog "dog".]

[ Gaze sliding sideways as he joins the dots up himself, he laughs and shakes his head. Alright, dog is Dog. He's not going to question it. ]

Yeah. I thought about what you said.

[ See? He listens, sometimes. ]

Didn't fancy being that dickhead who leaves a dog without a home.

[ Shrugging a shoulder, he clears his throat and sets his gaze back out the window. ]

So I've got Ozzy here for a little bit. Best little wingman, know what I mean?

That's good... I know why people want to get pets an' shit-- I don't think the imPorts here mistreat them or anythin'. It's a lovely companionship but... state of livin', ya know?

[he coos over ozzy for a moment, scritching his ears.]

Bet he's a good boy. You been pickin' up a load of people with this lil' man, then?

Yeah, I know. It was decent advice.

[ And Bob, much as he likes a bit of cheeky banter with his mates, is never shy about giving praise where it's due. At the question though he starts looking a little sheepish. ]

Yeah. Nah. ...not really the um-- [ Words. Sentences. Suddenly impossible. ]

He... he needs a better filter.

Pissed on someone's leg, did he? [he asks with a a laugh, either not bothered or not noticing the awkwardness.] Nah, I getcha. I'd be shit outta luck with a past coupl'a dates if I hadn't had Mightyena.

[he shifts in his seat, looking back at the big dog laying in the back seat.]

Though it was Muk that did all the work with Maxie, wasn't it? [the telltale thumping of a big dog tail hitting the seat in wags sounds, along with a low whine.] Oi, does Ozzy know any tricks? I'd bet Mightyena could trade some.

[ Exhaling around a laugh, he relaxes back into his seat, gaze flicking up at the overhead mirror at Mightyena in the back briefly with a grin before he's setting it back on the road.

With traffic snarled up as it is, he knows it's going to be a little while until he can really open the car up and he's already buzzing with the anticipation. ]

Yeah? Who's Maxie, then?

Ozzy? He's a big fan of gardening. Especially digging holes. Tricks I dunno.

It's complicated. Multiple timelines complicated.

[he leaves it at that with a light huff.]

Yeah? Mightyena's a good dad. He can show him stuff.

Fuck that. How the fuck do people get their head around that shit?

[ He's heard the multiple timeline theory and it still hurts his brain now. It's like trying to imagine how big the universe is. ]

Can he do shit like one of those... fuck, what're they called? [ He snaps his fingers trying to recall the words] Assistance dogs? You know the ones that make tea, do the washing, collect the post and all that...

With lots of headaches. I'm still not sure about most of it.

[ironcally, archie always coped with the idea of different worlds entirely rather than the concept of different timelines within his own world. when he discovered the version of him that helped save the world instead of trying to end it...

well, he doesn't like to think about it.]

Can't make tea with no thumbs, asshole. Aye, he could classify as one. His species are sentient; he fully understands human speech. I shit you not.

text - be gay do crimes

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