Video

[helpdesk_hero]

[Remember that dude that was rambling only a few weeks ago about doing stuff for young imPorts? Do you recognize his face enough to recognize him in the eleven year old who has stolen a hoodie from a housemate. Which has its hood pulled up. Which mostly, but doesn't completely, hide the pale yellow feathers over the top of his head. No, he will not be talking about those, thanks.]

So, when I said I wanted to help young imPorts, this wasn't what I meant.

Does, uh, anyone have a step-stool for a kitchen? Or who is willing to run out and get one for me? I need to make dinner but I am having issues reaching some of the pantry like this.

[He holds the camera a bit further away so he can be seen in relation to the counter in the kitchen. He wasn't a TALL eleven year old, okay? His growth spurt was when he was fourteen and right now he's only about four and a half feet and there are some annoyances here.]

And don't make any jokes. I may be in a kid's body, but I'm still capable of getting pay back.

Also, does anyone know what the FUCK is going on?

[Please don't lecture him for his language.]

I just want to make pasta primavera for dinner.

[And he definitely has that bit of whining that pre-teens get when they're told to do something they don't want to do.]

Comments

[detectivedwloki]

[He makes a face; wrinkling his nose.]

I hope there's better experiences out there in the future. Right now the world is full of shit.

[helpdesk_hero]

Yes, that seems an accurate description. As well call it a day ending in a 'y'.

[detectivedwloki]

Been more than a day.

[He says but focuses on the notepad as if he doesn't want to discuss that further.]

You know this still doesn't make any sense. But fine... You're not lying.

[He picks up the ring again and studies it.]

I have a lot of questions I'm sure you don't have the answers to.

[helpdesk_hero]

He's a very private man, I can't tell you more than his words can.

[detectivedwloki]

About myself, you mean?

You weren't that close?

[helpdesk_hero]

We're friends, but he's a very private man.

[Come on, man. how many times does he have to say it? The Detective is a private man.]

Just because I touched his mind once doesn't mean I retained the knowledge.

[detectivedwloki]

Can you not talk about me as if I'm a completely separate person in the future?

[helpdesk_hero]

In this place, we effectively are. People come and go. From different versions of their world, from different times. You learn to have to take them as separate people because you lost the other form of them. Or will.

[detectivedwloki]

But you're different. You remember.

[helpdesk_hero]

Yes, I do. Which means I remember the man as I knew him. You aren't him, yet. It's...

For all I know, he left and you're here instead.

[detectivedwloki]

So then it's like time travel.

[helpdesk_hero]

Except less resultant instability of the timeline.

[His voice sounds like he's seen it before.]

[detectivedwloki]

[He notices.]

You sound like an expert.

[helpdesk_hero]

There is this Ancient Chinese curse. May you live in interesting times.

I've lived in very interesting times.

[detectivedwloki]

You believe in curses?

[helpdesk_hero]

I traveled the multiverse with two gods, an emperor, and a woman who could kick through the very walls of reality.

Yeah. I think I do.

[detectivedwloki]

Sounds like quite the fantastical adventure.

[helpdesk_hero]

Yeah, no. It was not that lovely.

[But it's in the past.]

[detectivedwloki]

And now you're just.... trying to find a step-stool.

[helpdesk_hero]

Yeah. I'm...

[David sighs. YES. That is ACTUALLY his life.]

The fucking pasta is on a high shelf!

[detectivedwloki]

[He shrugs.]

Eat something else?

[helpdesk_hero]

But I wanted this?

[Yeah, half petulant tone.]

And the zucchini is PERFECTLY ripe.

[detectivedwloki]

Are you really an old lady? Why do you care about cooking?

[helpdesk_hero]

Because I'm TIRED of take out. Josh and Kavinsky rarely ever put in effort. And when you've got a professional chef's skill, you want to use it

[detectivedwloki]

You're a professional chef? Have you cooked for me?