001 | video

[ferrisbuellean]

[The video feed pans on to a well dressed, perfectly presented guy offering a winning smile as he sits in the booth of some fancy bar, all wood and leather, while nursing a glass of whiskey. Someone else is holding the camera and there's enough shaky cam and unfocused zooming to make the Bourne franchise jealous.]

Hey there. Do you like watching a ridiculously good looking man do law stuff? Want to watch him play some nondescript puzzle game on his phone for an entire hour? If yes, then have I got a surprise for you. If no, watch it anyway because apparently I need the ratings.

Jeff Winger here, Lawyer at Large and city hero bringing you a brand new series about me. [Another oh-so charming smile and a dramatic point to the camera.] And law!

Danger! Intrigue! Thrills! These are some things you'll probably never see in my show, but watch it anyway because hey, you might just strike it lucky. And ladies, you might just strike it lucky with me.

[Smirk smirk smirk, pause and then a glance off camera to someone, smugness replaced with a curious furrow of brows.] You guys do know I was disbarred ri-- [And the feed ends.]

Comments

[selfequipped]

Hey, I know that one! That I can do. Acceptable.

[ferrisbuellean]

Movie night!

[selfequipped]

Can do. But if you try to sneak in any movies of a certain breed, I will not be very pleased. I am stubborn about this one.

[ferrisbuellean]

Nah, I'll avoid Star Wars. Even if you should watch it at least once.

[selfequipped]

I'll keep the suggestion in mind.

[No, she really won't.]

[ferrisbuellean]

Maybe start off light with Indiana Jones.

[selfequipped]

I don't know how you can compare Star Wars to Indiana Jones. That's unfair to Indiana Jones.

Sorry, Harrison Ford!

[ferrisbuellean]

Because no one is watching Star Wars for the whiny kid. Harrison is literally the best thing about it.

[selfequipped]

But Harrison Ford has many movies without whiny kids.

[ferrisbuellean]

But not where he's a roguishly handsome space scoundrel.

[selfequipped]

Then maybe he should have been a roguishly handsome space scoundrel in a movie with a better script.

[ferrisbuellean]

Look, Lucas can't write, that much is true, but Harrison can act. And he can look damn good. You don't watch a sci-fi for the writing anyway.

[selfequipped]

I don't watch it at all! A life choice.

[ferrisbuellean]

You really should open yourself up to more cheese.

[selfequipped]

Oh, I love cheese. Good cheese.

Ever heard of the show MASH?

The best cheese.

[ferrisbuellean]

I had a friend back home who loved that show. Know what else he loved? Star Wars.

[selfequipped]

Hence the wonder of uniqueness among people!

[ferrisbuellean]

People are unique? That's where I've been going wrong all these years.

[selfequipped]

At least you have this wonder of a conversation to change your ways.

[ferrisbuellean]

I'm learning so much. Thank you.

[selfequipped]

You're very welcome.

[ferrisbuellean]

I'm sure we'll learn plenty more from each other. Especially if we get a few movie nights.

[selfequipped]

So, when are these still actually only hypothetical movie nights starting?

[ferrisbuellean]

Uuh, I guess some time that's convenient? I literally have no idea, I'm gonna be honest. I don't exactly have a routine set up yet.

[selfequipped]

We'll make a thing of it in a week from now, then.