003 | video

[textualhealing]

[It's video time with Jeff! Why can't he just do text like normal people, you ask? Because then the world wouldn't be able to see his beautiful face, duh. He's at his desk, lounging like a pro with a full glass of scotch held at eye line, managing to look somewhat thoughtful as he keeps his narrowed eyes on the alcohol before him.]

I went home like a month ago. Did one of those away for a day, lived a year things. Kinda makes you wonder what game the Porter's playing with crap like that, some weird ass brand of temptation and torture all in one.

So, real talk here, imPorts... If we all got told they didn't want us any more, that we got 24 hours to decide whether to go home or stay here forever, what would you do? Is what you built up here enough to keep you? Or are you just gonna be counting down the hours to get back and see those you left behind?

Pretty deep stuff, huh?

[He finally looks to the camera, just starting to reach to turn it off, before...]

Oh! And uh, season one of my show is drawing to a close soon. I know you've all been watching it avidly. Gotta start considering my options for next season, so wanna guest star? Got ideas? Wanna be in the crew? Hit me up. Time to make season two even better than the first. [And he's out, with a final, winning smile.]

Comments

[textualhealing]

I dunno what would be worse. Having a good time and being dragged back here, or having a shit time and knowing you'll eventually go back. Maybe best we settle in the middle.

[redplainsrider]

Often thunk on it myself, ain't come up with the answer yet. Just not thinkin' on it is the best option, reckon.

[textualhealing]

You been back yet?

[redplainsrider]

Back home? Naw, ain't been so fortunate-unfortunate. May be fer the best, ain't sure how I'd be able to keep my cool if'n they were to pull that stunt on me.

[textualhealing]

You think you'd lose your shit?

[redplainsrider]

Reckon. First time here, were too blindsided to do much than think it were all a dream. Second time, though...

[textualhealing]

Do you still think it's all a dream though...?

[redplainsrider]

[Long uncomfy pause of thinkin'.

Then all she does is half shrug.]

[textualhealing]

That... kinda seems like a vague maybe to me.

[redplainsrider]

Can't rightly say, can I? Though, reckon it ain't 'cause gettin' my arm chomped on by a landshark still hurts like a dickens an' ain't shown up to class in my underwear yet.

[textualhealing]

Plus I doubt you'd see beauty like mine even in your wildest dreams.

[OMG IT'S A JOKE OK??]

[redplainsrider]

[Rolls her eyes but in that way that suggests she may have gotten the clue it's a joke because he wouldn't be that dumb to try and stop her onaling, right?]

Reckon. Ain't never seen no one quite as ravishin' as you.

[textualhealing]

[Aww yeah, that's right, he's ravishing. Doesn't even care if that's sarcasm, he'll take it.]

Might wanna do a bit of onaling myself.

[redplainsrider]

Wishin' ya luck. It's very fulfillin'.

[She's saying that earnestly, forgetting how dirty that all sounds.]

[textualhealing]

I'm sure it is. You wanna show me the onal ropes?

[EYEBROW WAGGLE.]

[redplainsrider]

[She inhales to answer honestly again, about to launch into how it was actually a rather fulfilling system of relationship and all that, but no wait he's just joking.]

Reckon you oughta watch yerself, Croach's a jealous sort, an' is much larger than you.

[textualhealing]

How much larger are we talking...?

[redplainsrider]

Reckon I'm around 5 foot 10 or so. If I wanna kiss 'im an' he ain't bendin' down a midge like a gentleman, practically gotta hop.

That ain't even mentionin' his breadth.

[textualhealing]

That's fine. I'm pretty swole.

[redplainsrider]

What in blazes is a swole?

[textualhealing]

Y'know, like swollen. Pumped up. Muscled?

[redplainsrider]

Why woulda ya call yerself swollen, let alone swole? That sounds like yer diseased.

[textualhealing]

I dunno, it's just a thing. Used to be that a guy got pumped. Not he gets swole. I don't make the words, I just use 'em.

[redplainsrider]

Yeh. An' if folks were jumpin' off a bridge would ya do that, too.

[Because "swole" is truly a terrible word.]

[textualhealing]

People are jumping off bridges? Where? I must join them immediately.