Audio --> Video

[buildsfriends]

I AM ON THE RADIO

Deet deet deet, boop boop beep boop. But-tons but-tons...

[The video comes on but it's just a shot of the top half of his helmet and the sky above because he's holding his comm like a walkie-talkie.

He puts on a 'authoritative' voice.] Hello. Yes. This is Captain General Fourth Class Caboose. I need you to deliver to me at least fourteen new friends, stat. ASAP, and...BYOB. NASDAQ. Over and out and in, amen.








[...the video continues with just a shot of his armored foot on a grubby sidewalk and his voice further off.]

OH MY GOD FRECKLES LOOK! An outside party!

[A grating mechanical voice answers:] Hostiles detected.

Comments

[buildsfriends]

[he got one letter out of three right man that's a pretty good ratio for him on a first try] Nah I'm usually saving them. [that iS A LIE] I mean they help sometimes but...Tucker especially. Always in trouble.

[scleras]

Sounds like a mess. Good thing they have someone like you around.

Do you think you'll be staying with them here? To keep them in line?

[buildsfriends]

Yup! Yeah, I move around a lot? Usually with the regular people though, but sometimes the Reds aren't around like now, and sometimes Tucker goes into the desert for no reason [no the reason was relocation orders] and Church leaves a lot but I usually find them later. Or they find me and then we're together again. Sometimes you just have to sit still and wait.

[scleras]

That's exactly right.

I also have friends who tend to get themselves into trouble.

[buildsfriends]

Man, I just- I know exactly what you mean. But it always turns out pretty fun.

Do you have lots of adventures? Oh, and stories? I love stories.

[scleras]

Hm... I don't know if any of my stories would interest you. I'm just an artist who does mask commissions. That's pretty boring compared to being a soldier.

[buildsfriends]

I PAINTED SOMETHING TODAY! You should come painting also! [Caboose manages to point the camera of his comm over at the graffiti on the wall, which had clearly begun to spell the words FUCK THE POLI until Caboose took over and covered it in flowers and tanks and what might be Godzilla in aqua space armor.] It's pretty fun.

[scleras]

You did that? I'm very impressed. You're quite talented.

Unfortunately my work is keeping me here right now.

[buildsfriends]

That is pretty boring. [wow] But such is life. [nno? no] Until you quit your job, then I guess it's something different.

[scleras]

I do plan on switching jobs eventually! [To the one he's pretending he already has here right now...] But I need money for that first. You know how it goes.

[buildsfriends]

Oh! You can probably make money if you kill somebody! That's how Tex made a lot of her money!

[scleras]

Hmm? Was she a mercenary?

[buildsfriends]

She was a Freelancer! Also a shark and probably also a computer. She was really good at beating people up, so she would do it if we gave her money.

[scleras]

All of those things? You sure know some interesting people.

[buildsfriends]

Yeah, I like meeting new people. You could probably meet lots of new people too if you quit your boring job and killed for money. But you might have to kill a bunch of the people you meet. So that might not be AS good.

Definitely better than what you're doing now though.

[scleras]

I don't know if I'm cut out to kill people for money. [He only kills people for food.]

We can't all be millionaires. Then there wouldn't be any butlers.

[buildsfriends]

I bet you could kill people if you really wanted to! But yeah, it's pretty hard to do. Especially if those people are way better than you are.

I guess you gotta be a butler. Try to make it fun!

[scleras]

Butler has a varied meaning here, but you're a clever guy. I'm sure you know what I mean. [No.]

Oh hey, have you ever been on TV?

[buildsfriends]

Nope I don't! That's okay. [a relief, surely]

YES! I was on TV once because everyone was talking and an old man wanted to shake Agent Carolina's hand. It was pretty boring also so I stopped paying attention, but then we got food so it was nice.

[scleras]

Interesting!

What about gameshows. Do you like those?

[buildsfriends]

Nope. I like the shows with the numbers you can call and then get them to send you presents. [infomercials are this dude's JAM]

[scleras]

Ah, good choice. Sadly I don't have any connections with those. Have you found any stations here so far?

[buildsfriends]

Nope, I'm not on the TV right now because I'm painting and exploring and meeting new friends. Sometimes you have to go outside, or you have no friends and no life. Like Simmons.

[scleras]

Is that another friend of yours?

[buildsfriends]

Oh yeah, he's definitely a friend. We've tried to kill each other a lot of times, and then we stopped, and then we tried again for a little while but neither of us was really into it so we stopped again and we haven't tried since.