maskormenace | 010 ♍ text ♍ locked from norman osborn, hazel lockwood

010 ♍ text ♍ locked from norman osborn, hazel lockwood

hope can be such a fickle thing

ive lived my life without it for years and it chooses now of all times to barrel its way back in
but none of that makes it fit in the environment
its only like an ice cube trying to enjoy a summers day

even when im staring at it in front of me i cant seem to conquer the idea that it isnt mine
that im not the one who gets a happy ending its only being borrowed from someone else
another me from another timeline who things progressed more happily for
another me who could look at this and actually feel like shes earned it

i dont know what to do with this feeling
except to know its made a fool of me

[ She includes a photo taken on her desk, some weird black ball covered in candy corn spikes. Is it a Halloween decoration? ]

im going to be a mother after all

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[ You know what, for this she's even going to let the "Miss" slide. ]

My entire life has been in preparation for this moment
i think that if there would ever be a chance for me to be happy
this is it

[He'll remember he's not supposed to call you 'miss' in a second. He got really excited about babies, okay??]

 Your entire life, huh? That's pretty ambitious. Your mother must have given you a pretty damn good influence for you to want to grow up to be a mom, too.

If this is your chance, then. Take it by the horns. (*≧▽≦)ﾉｼ)) Haha.

im sure she will take me by the horns before i could even try
hers will of course be far too small at the start

but it was as much necessity as desire that turned me in this direction
when repopulation becomes a high priority a mothers job is very important

 ...Huh.

Repopulation? Cripes that sounds a lot bigger than having just one kid. I mean, I know you're not human, but... I guess I don't think about things like this. Whoops.

[ It's something she thinks about rather a lot, but that doesn't make it any kind of common thing. ]

i dont imagine its something youve ever had reason to
unless your species is on the brink of extinction and i just never noticed

--Haha. Yeah, you make a good point. While we definitely have an issue with humans being wiped out a lot, we definitely don't got anything as big as extinction going on.

seven billion and more at last count
i think humans are doing just fine

trolls meanwhile are a billionth of that
which is pretty easy math actually

 ...Yikes.
Yeah, we're. Doin' just fine, in retrospect.

In that case, I'm ten times as glad that you're gonna' be a mother.
You got a huge job ahead of ya, Kanaya.

and not one i expect ill be able to complete here
but its still enough for me to know that hope exists that another me in another universe will have the chance to complete it
and i will have my own opportunity to mirror the endeavor
even if it doesnt lead to anything

[There's a pause. A notably long one, which is strange for the sunflower-haired male's usually quick, spontaneous replies. When the mode of messaging switches over to private, she may understand why it took him a moment to respond.]

Isn't it dangerous to parade something that important over the network.

[Maybe a bit suddenly grim a turn, sure, but. This is the fate of an entire species we have here.]

No disrespect. And that isn't a threat or something like that.

Just saying--we all have enemies here, whether we like it or not.

[Not as big as a ditz as he lets on.]

[ Being grim and cynical is something she can never fully hold against anyone, even in her newly bright and optimistic circumstances. Old habits die hard, and even she can't dismiss the possibility of a bad outcome. ]

i appreciate the concern mr hideyoshi
but this memo was never fully public to begin with
i know who my enemies are and made a point of excluding them

but at the same time i understand there may be others i wont know
and anyone whose design it may be to steal my light will be themselves snuffed out
to use the gentlest euphemism possible

there are many dangerous things we can do
but my present joy is important enough to me that i choose the risk of sharing it

[While grim, quiet moods and situations certainly weren't his favourite, he's a firm believer in 'there's a time and place.'
He didn't know Kanaya very well, but he didn't want to see her hurt by losing what's made her so happy here, today, either.]

 Heh. I'm glad to hear that, then, honestly. I guess I'm just prone to worryin' about the small stuff sometimes, you'll have to forgive me that one little flaw.

Sometimes it's your light that people always get the worst ideas about. But if you're not worried, then I won't be worried either.

I'll just be over here in Heropa, rootin' for you.

id hardly consider it a flaw
someone has to mind the details
and the larger scope and the consequences
when we cant be sure others are thinking about them that becomes our job
and id prefer the reminder to not having anyone to do that minding

from maurtia falls we appreciate the cheers

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010 ♍ text ♍ locked from norman osborn, hazel lockwood

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