Video; open to Action for Nonah #03 residents

[wizzardly]

[This is not Rincewind's first attempt at accessing the network. Shamefully, it's not even his fourth attempt, even after all the helpful advice (which he smiled brightly through and nodded at and didn't listen to at all). Obviously he's managed to get the unfamiliar technology to finally work for him though, as that's definitely his sullen face coming across the imPort channels. He's on the floor of his new room, his back against his bed and his arm slung over a large wooden chest. His broad-brimmed hat proclaims him to be a 'Wizzard'.

He is also, quite obviously, very drunk.]

Right. I think we can all agree that this is absolutely mad, right? And not even - not even all these things that are going 'round doing stuff without any sort of magic or tiny imps painting pictures inside them, that's not even what I'm talking about here, that part I could almost like, since it seems somewhat sensible, the principle of it. ...Although it still isn't, is it, because there's apparently all these powers and such, which totally throws that whole thing about being sensible right out the window. And being handed out like meat-pies or something too, with no thought as to who's getting them. M'sure that's not something that's going to blow up in anyone's face, is it? Probably literally, if I had my guess.

...Right, where was I going with this?

[there's a pause as Rincewind casts about for the tenuous line of focus that brought him here in the first place, and which he's sure to be appropriately horrified he followed when he sobers up tomorrow.

Apparently he finds it again, and slaps his hand (the one not currently holding a bottle of wine) on the wooden trunk for emphasis. The chest lifts its lid some, in grumpy protest.] - Heroes! Heroes, that's what I was getting at - this whole business about people being fished out of their own perfectly good - well, okay, mostly good. Somewhat. ...At least familiar worlds, and then being asked to - to - to do what? Be a hero? I've met heroes, you know, quite more than I'd have liked, and do you know what heroes are?

Dangerous, that's what. [firmly.] Dangerous, utterly reckless madmen, that's what heroes are. People who have as much trouble realizing why you shouldn't go barreling into dark caves full of horrible monsters to get the gold, or rescue the girl, as they do recognizing a good thing when they have it. Which is living. ...Which they risk. ...To be heroes.

But you know the most important thing about them? [he continues, fervently] The most important thing about heroes is that - ! Well, it's that - !

...It's that I'm not one.

[Rincewind quiets, and swipes the sleeve of his robe across his nose with a miserable, dry sniff. He frowns, sighs.] Not that it matters, I suppose. Not that it ever matters.

Comments

[brushoff]

I was well-off before the book was written. [ so no ] Besides, considering I die at the end of the book, it'd be awfully suspect if I tried to make money off it, wouldn't it?

[wizzardly]

Sounds like you need to have a rather serious talk with the author then, I think they've gotten some details wrong.

[brushoff]

The thing is, he chose to kill me off on purpose. Oscar, that's who wrote the book by the way, Oscar and I had radically different views on immortality.

[wizzardly]

Still seems a bit harsh, killing someone off because you disagree with them. Even if it's not literally.

[brushoff]

I suppose that's where we'll have to agree to disagree.

[wizzardly]

[he shrugs.]

Fair enough.

[brushoff]

[ Dorian can't help but pause a moment, frowning before he continues. ] You're obviously in the anti-demon camp, but what are your feelings on immortality?

[wizzardly]

...I don't know, actually. I think... I think eternal youth is the way to go about it, I guess, if one's going to look at living forever as a real goal.

[his brow furrows.] It just... well, we're not exactly meant to, are we? And I'm not saying it has on you, but I think you've got to assume it would be easy for immortality to take a toll on people, mentally. Drive people a bit mad. Or a lot mad. In dangerous, delusions-of-godhood sort of ways. I've seen it happen before, it really doesn't take much power sparking the idea for people to grab hold and run off with it.

And I imagine... I imagine it would get very lonely. A lot of much shorter lives are already, so I doubt stretching them out that much longer would be an improvement.

[brushoff]

[ congrats Rincewind, you have hit the nail on the head. ]

My pet theory is that when you become immortal, something changes. I've only met a few immortals, but none of them seemed keen on godlike tendencies.

[ he's not denying the lonely bit, tho ]

[wizzardly]

[he notices that. He thinks about asking, briefly, but on the whole Rincewind isn't one to pry. So:] Well, good to know I won't have to worry about making donations to two churches then. But do let me know if those thoughts of godhood come 'round.

...Still, s'all a bit depressing, really. All this talk about mortality. If we keep on this I think I'm going to need more wine.

[brushoff]

Have you tried gin instead? I find that's better for dealing with mortality than wine.

[ cause you can get REALLY FUCKING DRUNK as fast as you can ]

[wizzardly]

Not yet, no. I mostly just stick to wine and beer. Have had whiskey once or twice, when it was offered, and I tried absinthe once when I was a student at the University. [and then never again, because the night ended with him in just his underwear and hat on the roof, claiming he knew how to levitate.

...He never had figured out why being in his underwear had come into it.]

A favorite, I take it?

[brushoff]

Well absinthe is obviously the best, but when I want to get drunk without much effort, go for gin.

[wizzardly]

I'll give it a go, next time I'm in a tavern. [which is often.]

[brushoff]

My kind of person! [ said with a teasing laugh. ]