video

[glitterateur]

[There’s a lot of noise in the background of this video post. Like, way more noise than usual when Mabel’s face shows up on the network. One could say almost… exactly double the noise?]

Hi! Hey. Important question. I know everybody’s busy with stuff but this is a matter of life and death probably? Through forces beyond our control we have an animal that-- well look!

[The camera pans. Two twelve year old boys (who look suspiciously like tiny versions of the Stans) are riding a magnificent creature around a living room. Dipper watches anxiously, but seems resigned to the situation. He has the look of someone who has walked through the flames of hell and can now withstand anything. The camera stays on the chaos long enough for one of the Stan kids to fall off the… thing. The lower part of the thing. The part you can conceivably ride on.]

It’s a centaurtaur! And we’re not sure how it breathes? Or eats. We have some, um, theories but we can’t test it because we can't reach. So if anyone’s ever had any experience with an animal like this or you’re pretty tall and willing to help us do some research please let us know! Thanks.

Comments

[hardcorduroy]

... wait, that thing's magic, right? Who says it even needs to eat or breathe or anything. (SHIT'S BAD WHEN WENDY IS SENSIBLE.) So can I ride it?

[glitterateur]

The last time we thought an animal was magical and never needed to eat the animal definitely needed to eat.

[hardcorduroy]

I think we need to find someone who can like psychically talk to animals and find out if that thing is.... okay, I guess.

[glitterateur]

I think we have someone ready and willing to try it! I think all he's gonna hear is some neighing though. Magical neighing!

[Or eldritch screaming.]

[hardcorduroy]

That's good.So hopefully it's not suffering or something. (a pause.) I can still ride it, right?

[glitterateur]

Oh yeah totally. [As if she would deny Wendy the chance to do something cool.] You might have to fight little Stan for a shot, though. Don't rough him up too much!

[hardcorduroy]

Are you seriously asking me not to beat up my boss. Mabel, this is a once in a lifetime opportunity for payback.

[ursawhiner]

Even skateboarding owls need to eat! So a centaurtaur probably needs to eat too!

[hardcorduroy]

Okay, you're definitely telling me that story later, and are you absolutely sure it needs to eat because it seems fine so far.

[ursawhiner]

It can probably go without food for a little while. But if it sticks around, then it's going to need food eventually.

[hardcorduroy]

Where did you guys even find that weird... double horse thing. And why did you take it? It was Mabel, wasn't it. Mabel wanted to keep it.

[ursawhiner]

It's from a Dungeons, Dungeons and More Dungeons game back home. Ford summoned it with his magic die.

[hardcorduroy]

Oh yeah, homework the game, right? (SORRY DIPPER...) Why were you guys playing with a magic die?

[ursawhiner]

It's not-- You know what, never mind! The die is one of Ford's powers. It does different stuff depending on what you roll.

[hardcorduroy]

Iiiii'm guessing it's random and you have absolutely zero idea of who or what will pop out.

[ursawhiner]

Pretty much. We took it away before they could roll it again.

[hardcorduroy]

Why did you let them near it in the first place?

[oldstandard]

After us! We have dibs!

[hardcorduroy]

Okay, then I call second dibs and best friend right that no one can cut in front of my dibs after you.

[oldstandard]

You got it! ...Then me and Ford have third dibs because we'll probably fall off again.

[hardcorduroy]

Saddles, dude. Or glue. Glue's probably better since you can just fall off the saddle, too.