wizzardly: (Mr. Suspicious)
Rincewind ([personal profile] wizzardly) wrote in [community profile] maskormenace2016-08-03 10:14 pm

video; open to action for Hotel Castile residents

This - !

[is an angry wizard, actually, in a lovely little hotel room. A wizard who is only on his second glass of wine. But he seems to be referencing the movie he's waving angrily at his communicator.

It's "The Wizard of Oz".
]

- This is terrible! An absolute mockery, is what it is! I've had so many people bringing this up, and I think to watch it for myself, and I find - I find - right, so, the wizard is a fake. Let's address that first of all, shall we? They all go on this big quest to get to the wizard, and he's fake, but how did the people not realize that in the first place, that's what I want to know.

He doesn't even have a pointy hat.

[Rincewind waves a hand.]

It's all a bad message, is what it is! Making wizards look bad! And look, the whole thing about witches being green - I mean honestly, witches are scary enough on their own without all that. That's obviously added. And the flying monkeys -

[he shudders. Never mind, not addressing those. Those were terrifying.]

But I've certainly never heard anything about them melting with a bit of water. Even trained hydrophobes don't do that. Bloody ridiculous.

The whole thing is ridiculous, is what I'm really getting at. We're supposed to believe a scarecrow which can talk and walk about is brainless? Or what about it trying to get everyone to buy that the strange man with ribbons in his hair is "a lion"? And ignoring that whole bit about how this Dorothy person could have just clicked her heels the whole time, enchanted shoes aren't what they're cracked up to be in the first place, the University can tell you. Half of her would have probably been teleported back to Kansas faster than the other half, and that would have certainly been a bloody mess. Very gruesome.

Anyway, it was hideous and I don't understand why so many of you reference it in the first place.

[two thumbs down, says newly self-appointed movie critic Rincewind; only one and a half poorly-sequined stars.]
brushoff: (contemplating stuff)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-04 04:34 am (UTC)(link)
Good, I don't believe in karma either. The entire concept seems like it was come up with someone who was sick and tired of being at the bottom.

[ but as for Rincewind's question.... ]

Really, the initial point of my case was I just didn't want to grow old. I made my wish for immortality after I saw a portrait of myself and realized that while I would grow old and decrepit, the portrait would never age a single day.
brushoff: (let's talk about BOOKS.)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-05 03:26 pm (UTC)(link)
The actual, literal portrait. Now I remain eternally young and beautiful, and the portrait takes on any sign of age. [ and sin but well, let's not talk about that. ]

Again, you really need to read my book.
brushoff: (evil cocaine what?)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-05 06:25 pm (UTC)(link)
It's what keeps me alive, of course I have it with me. It's simply in a safety deposit box right now.

[ well actually it's hidden in Will's attic because WILL GRAHAM IS A BUTTMUNCH and you don't steal friends portraits!!! but dodo doesn't know that. ]
brushoff: (what even is this expression)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 03:56 am (UTC)(link)
I don't antagonize people. Besides, it's as much a 'weakness' as getting stabbed is for most people.
brushoff: (contemplating stuff)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 04:11 am (UTC)(link)
I've got no idea why you'd have that idea to begin with!

[ that entirely 100% correct idea. there's a pause and a siiiiigh ]

Honestly Rincewind, you're acting strange. You sure you're alright?
brushoff: (well yeah if you THINK that)

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 04:15 am (UTC)(link)
[ Dorian...is blissfully unaware of what Rincewind's talking about. But oh, that reference to his lungs gives him a good idea. Dammit, which one told: was it Chilton or Will? ]

You must be mistaken: I don't get sick.
brushoff: (ew no)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 04:40 am (UTC)(link)
[ Okay that's it, Dorian's swapping this to private because Rincewind's got to know. Question now is, does he have to worry about Will or Chilton ]

If you're insinuating something about me, then go ahead and say it.
brushoff: (yeeeeeeeah no)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 05:30 am (UTC)(link)
[ ohhhhhh fuck. ]

I didn't do any of that! I'll admit that those are my organs but cutting me up and sending them? That was all Will's doing.

[ after Dorian did the same thing to Will for a while but DETAILS, DETAILS. ]
brushoff: (if i stare will it work???)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-06 05:52 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, I had plenty of interest as to where they went. I don't know if you know this, Rincewind, but I can't stand that egomaniac Chilton. [ battle of the narcissists between those two. ]

Besides, apparently those sorts of gift baskets were a daily occurrence back in their Baltimore!
brushoff: (coming close to shooty time)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-08 01:43 am (UTC)(link)
This was a joint effort between Will and I! I don't terrorize people who annoy me because, surprise surprise, half the population here annoys me!

Chilton deserved to be knocked off his high horse, after all.
brushoff: (that sure is some smarmy cover art)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-08 02:01 am (UTC)(link)
[ Dorian just shoots the camera a look of pure "yeah RIGHT." He honestly doesn't believe that Rincewind would be upset if someone was messing with him like he messed with Chilton. ]

Of course it was cruel. That's the entire point of it.
brushoff: (insert cigarettes lyric here)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-17 02:16 am (UTC)(link)
[ Yes but have you considered that being petty and cruel is fun. There's a pause and a shrug before Dorian continues....and changes the subject because no, he's not satisfied, too many people know about this thing and he never expected it to go this big. ]

I hope Will's getting the same level of vitriol as I am. After all, he was equally petty and cruel—though it's a bit worse because I never gave a damn about Chilton. He and Will were friends.
brushoff: (evil cocaine what?)

private

[personal profile] brushoff 2016-08-17 02:31 am (UTC)(link)
Which hotel? [ said in a tone of honest curiosity over anything else. ]

private

[personal profile] brushoff - 2016-08-17 02:49 (UTC) - Expand

private

[personal profile] brushoff - 2016-08-17 15:31 (UTC) - Expand