maskormenace | 001

Entry tags:

001 | Video

[The vid flickers on showing a polished wood backdrop and the sounds of conversation and the clink of glass on wood. A man slides into view, black jacket, a grey low v-neck shirt and a middle aged face shifted into an amused smile topped with scruffy ash blond hair. He opens his mouth and speaks in an accented voice that would sound english to most ears, but seems to have a faint french lilt.]

Now, clearly those in charge of this little reality don't seem to have thought everything through.... I mean, Substitute Elementary school teacher? Me?
Unless they're hoping for the mess that seems to be going on, which in that case, well bloody done. I'm sure the havoc will be a joy to whatever runs this universe.

[He pauses and takes a sip of scotch and musters a cheery smile.]

Now's hoping there's some actual entertainment to be had since I'm stuck here.
Anyone care to recommend somewhere... [His lifts his brows suggestively] fun?

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If you were playing the double agent to help the Winchesters, then that puts Castiel in the wrong by default. Don't worry, we'll figure something out.

[Another drink sounds good, but this is all way too serious for Gabriel's liking. In theory they should be celebrating Lucifer being put away. So with a flick of the wrist, Gabriel holds out some notes to the barkeep, ordering a bottle of jaegermeister and two glasses.]

Yep. This round's on me. And it's not cheating, not really. I'm just not taking on some bullshit job.

Hmph.

[He's not so sure he agrees. He did everything to try and save Castiel from himself. But what's done is done and all that.
He raises a brow at the drink choice.]

Miming. I thought you would've gotten a laugh out of making real invisible walls for everyone to walk into.

[Don't judge, Batlhazar. It's potent and sweet enough. A double win. That and if Balthazar doesn't want it, Gabriel will drink it. Without another word on Castiel or Winchesters, the archangel just pours out the two drinks.]

I could have, but that's not exactly a high paying job. I am not busting my ass to go home with a few dollars at the end of the day.

[That and okay, it might have been a little demeaning just thinking about it.]

[He's not judging, just... well it's early for most. He does enjoy a good jager-bomb. Especially since it tends to get inhibitions lowered.]

No, I don't blame you. And I thought children would be bad enough.

[He throws his back and downs it. Yes, alcohol. Good.]

[Balthazar no. It's happy hour in the world somewhere.]

That and you'll quickly realize people around here can't take a joke. It's pretty tragic.

Sam is around somewhere. Probably still sulking at me for killing Dean. Like seriously sulking. I was helping out at one point and he still gave me crap for it. Telling you now, Winchester grudges will outlast creation.

[Do you see him complaining? Bring on the alcohol.]

Please tell me you're... No never mind. I'll believe it. Tragic the state of human affairs.

[A snort.]

Funny you should mention him. He owes me a debt.

[Gives a slight laugh. Gabriel wishes he was joking. Most people in this place are of the die hard stoic variety. The first shot of jaeger goes down with barely an after thought.]

How did you manage that?

Left his soul in Lucifer's cage. Spent a year and a half having it hate banged my Michael and Lucy.

[He pours himself another.]

Dean had a plan the was going to work and Sam's body didn't want it anymore. He asked for information, I gave it. And he never paid me back.

That's just rude of him. Seriously, I have to wonder about those two sometimes. Beings seem to bend over backwards for them and only the worst comes from it. Like some curse. Yup, a curse. We all got suckered in.

[Drops a wink, yeah he might not be 100% serious on that one. What he is serious on? Is pouring himself another drink.]

Last few months have been pretty shocking here, and I'm not talking "season cancelled" serious either.

Well there's still time if he's here. I may be dead and all but I'm owed.

[He just grins and shakes his head.]

Do tell? If I'm forced to endure this place, at least it'd better be entertaining.

[Rolls his eyes again. Oh boy, where to start?]

Well, Luci decided the way to introduce himself was to lock some people in a building and set fire to it. Which he filmed and put on the network. Then outed my details on public television and then went on a ritualistic murder spree.

That's been going on the last few months, it's only just recently that ended. Apart from that, I got no idea. There was some shit about a monorail being blown up but I think I was nursing a hangover for that one or something.

Riiight, so business as usual for him then.

[Under the calm, Balthazar is a little shaken at the thought of Lucifer being here at all. Even if he was locked away, powers taken... It was still the Morningstar.]

And everyone know's or at least has heard you're an angel. That must've been fun.

[The last bit get's him to crack a smile before downing his drink.

And pouring another.]

You get hangovers?

It was, for the most part people think I'm either lying or crazy. So I don't get harassed at all over it. I'd call that a successful misdirect, or whatever.

[Shrugs. The only person who'd given a fuck was Loki. And that was over the fact Gabriel had given the name Loki in the first place.]

Yeah about that. This place decided I was just too awesome and took away a few things. Healing being one of them. Sprained my ankle a little while back and thought I'd have to call the Rit Zien up.

Small graces at least. Thank Dad for skeptics.

[Well that explained why he was missing certain talents. No sensing thoughts or feelings, no ability to see the living souls around him. It was frustrating.]

That must've been utterly devastating. What's the colloquial term? Lame?

Gotta love them. That and they're just so fun to wind up, especially the crazy rich televangelists.

[Welcome to the lacking skills party, Balthazar. Doesn't it just suck?]

At least that was the only "biggie" they opted to take away. It's not like I've been running into traffic, so I've got that going for me. And yes, it's very lame. You're catching up with the times already.

And the clergy. And right wing politicians.
I've never had more fun.

Well until sex that is.

[Ugh, he does not want to think about that. It's weird enough hearing nothing all the bloody time.]

Still, to be downed by a sprained ankle? It's almost enough to tarnish your image, brother.

I learn quite, unlike Cas.

So many things to do, so little time. Here there's no Heaven or Hell, so do what you want, there won't be any repercussions from upstairs at any rate.

[Huffs and downs his drink, pouring out some more.]

Yeah. Was on the receiving end of good ole human sympathy. As in I got none. Met your "roomies" yet?

Well then, since you say that... [He downs his drink and pauses before shaking his head.]

In time. I'll explore. Find out all it's little secrets.

[A dark chuckle.]
My dear brother, my sympathies.

One of them. Someone called Apollo. Not the deity.

[Belated sympathies are better than no sympathies, and Gabriel is already planning something. It's not like he spends a lot of time in his own apartment, barely even knows the roomies. Quite a few of them have actually come and gone in this place.]

Apollo huh? Seems to be a common thing around here. I know a guy called Phoenix, though he's not an actual phoenix. Nope, just you, Lucifer and me when it comes to deities.

Oh, and if you see some kid going around calling himself Loki, it's not me in disguise okay? He's actually Loki from a different universe. All kinds of hilarious when I turned up and tried using the same name.

You know what? We should get our own place.

[Plans? Oh dear. Do they involve shirtlessness? ]\

Apollo Justice was the full moniker. [He laughs out loud at that and spins the glass in his hand.]

So nothing else as divine. I'll remember that as a pick up line. [Bal, no. Just no.]

Oh? I'll have to keep an eye out then.

. . .

Agreed. But where?

Wow his parents either loved him very much, or hated him. Not quite sure which one though.

It's a good pickup line, it works. And I have no idea where, I didn't think it through that much yet. Though at least it cuts down on the human casualties when Lucifer breaks out of jail and comes to kick my ass.

[Actually salutes with his drink at that one.]

Absolutely no idea but he is at least aware of it's... Individuality.

People are as skeptical as you warned me. And the old lightning and thunder doesn't seem to work nearly as well.

[Balthazar freezes and turns on his seat to face his brother. He does not look impressed.]

Because of course he'd come to kick your ass. What exactly happened?

That's a first.

[Yeah, Gabriel sees that unimpressed look. What else is he meant to do? It's a matter of fact he'll be up on the target list once Lucifer gets out. Having a sense of humour about it at least dampens the horror slightly.

At least Gabriel has the audacity to look slightly mollified, idly scratching at his jaw.]

I think I got in over my head this time. Honestly. He was going to do that ritual, it involved killing about twenty people and I knew about it from the get go. I thought if it worked, then what was twenty people compared to the real damage he could do here if Lucifer didn't go home? You've seen them around here, Balth. No-one believes either of us are who we say we are, so I couldn't even count on backup if I wanted it.

[He's not sure how to take that. The knowledge that Gabriel was going to let Lucifer murder people just to get him out of here in the hope that it worked.
No Lucifer was better but that was...

For once Balthazar is glad he was never one that had to make choices regarding the lives of others. Silently he grabs the bottle and fills his glass before emptying it in a single go.

Then he pours another and repeats the process.

And again.]

Alright. And then what? The stopped him? You stopped him? What?

[Yeah, Balthazar taking all those shots says everything on the matter. Even Gabriel isn't proud of himself for that one, and no-one in the entire place but Lucifer knows about it.

It's a small miracle that his brother didn't drag him down during the trial. He could have done so very easily.]

And then Loki and I had a discussion and realized he was going to break the fabric of existence with the ritual he was planning. So we tried to interrupt one of the ritual killings, which worked as well as a chocolate fireguard. And then his ritual didn't work so he redirected it into unleashing a shit ton of monsters.

And then everyone heroed up, kicked the snot out of the monsters, and the Government pressed a shiny button that turned Lucifer's powers off so he could be arrested and contained. Why they didn't just do that in the first place, I don't know.

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