video;

[helpline]

[ The Doctor gives the camera a grin and a little nod. ]

Hello network! Just have a quick question here, time to take a roll call! Who's got magical creepy healing powers?

[ this is "being subtle." Sorry Clara. There's a big grin before, ]

Oh! Also, how do you own a shop? Apparently I got promoted. I've worked in a shop before but I don't think I've ever owned one.

Comments

[helpline]

Does not! Everybody takes censuses!

[shifting]

Yeah, but you start askin' after specific powers 'n people can get anxious you're lookin' to take advantage of 'em.

Also if your census is just a single question it's a pretty shit census. I think I'm still gonna hold to my theory you've got somethin' you need healed.

[helpline]

Look, we can meet up or you use creepy powers over the device and you'll see that I don't need anything healed. I'm just curious.

[shifting]

Well, my creepy powers mostly just make me look a fool if there's no one to use 'em on. Wouldn't be much of a demonstration.

[helpline]

In that case, just describe what your creepy powers do, so I can get a good idea of what it is.

[shifting]

...I can heal people by lickin' 'em. [deadpan. Yes, he's aware of how terrible that sounds.] Or just - puttin' my mouth on 'em. Far as I can tell.

[helpline]

...right, when I said 'creepy healing powers', I didn't know about healing saliva but yeah, that's kind of creepy.

[shifting]

Hey, you asked.

[helpline]

And you answered. You're winning the creepy prize, by the way.

[shifting]

Lucky me. There an actual prize?

[helpline]

There can be. D'you want one?

[ It'll probably involve macaroni art. ]

[shifting]

At the risk of regrettin' sayin' so, yeah.

[helpline]

Wonderful! I'll wait a week or so to see if anyone creepier chimes in and if not, I'll find a way to send you your prize.