video;

[helpline]

[ The Doctor gives the camera a grin and a little nod. ]

Hello network! Just have a quick question here, time to take a roll call! Who's got magical creepy healing powers?

[ this is "being subtle." Sorry Clara. There's a big grin before, ]

Oh! Also, how do you own a shop? Apparently I got promoted. I've worked in a shop before but I don't think I've ever owned one.

Comments

[helpline]

You've got to let young snots touch the metaphorical burner a couple of times so they learn not to do it in the first place.

[deadtective]

Have I ever been trained out of doing anything in the time you've known me?

[the answer is no. Hazel is unconditionable.]

[helpline]

First time for everything!

[ he knows the answer is no ]

[deadtective]

Maybe you should hold your breath until it happens, then.

[helpline]

I can hold my breath for a while but I don't think that long.

[deadtective]

First time for everything, right?

[helpline]

Let's have a contest like getting things off the top shelves instead.

[deadtective]

I gave the last guy who tried that a concussion.

[she's only half kidding. Tadashi may not have been concussed, but she did fucking suplex him from off a store shelf.]

[helpline]

What, really?

[ because he believes this but also doesn't believe this ]

[deadtective]

Yeah, really.

[helpline]

What poor soul got a concussion from you?

[deadtective]

He's not here anymore, so it doesn't really matter.

[helpline]

Course it matters! He might show up again.

[ and THEN it'd be great teasing material. ]

[deadtective]

Not if he's smart he won't.

[helpline]

You've forgotten the whole 'we don't have a choice in who shows up' bit, haven't you.

[deadtective]

We don't have a choice, but who knows about the other side.

[helpline]

Well I didn't vote for coming here.

[deadtective]

Nobody really cares what you think, no matter what side you're on.

[helpline]

Scuze you, the weird code people care what I think. I've got a secret admirer.

[ Doctor you should be worried about that. ]

[deadtective]

They said they're looking at you, not that they give a fuck about what you've got to say. There's a big difference.

[helpline]

You're just jealous.

[deadtective]

I've been in a top ten before, dude. I'm just telling you that you're going to get your ass beat.

[granted, that top ten was her murderer's...]

[helpline]

You worry too much. I've got advanced alien technology, good endurance, and rusty martial arts skills, I'll put up a great fight!

[deadtective]

I could crush your skull with a little elbow grease. You're a walking front page tragedy waiting to happen.

[helpline]

Advanced alien bones as well. No crushing happening here.