video;

[brushoff]

[ Dorian's sitting down on a small, jet black armchair, tucked in the corner of an all too busy bedroom. There's a bookshelf stacked to the brim with books to the left and a medium sized oil painting hanging on the wall, a Romantic seascape with more emphasis on the clouds than the water, clouds painted in dark, stormy, gray brushstrokes. Dorian gives the camera a small nod, then starts to read from a book, in an even, measured tone, perfect for audiobooks. ]

"It was the strangest book that he had ever read. It seemed to him that in exquisite raiment, and to the delicate sound of flutes, the sins of the world were passing in dumb show before him. Things that he had dimly dreamed of were suddenly made real to him. Things of which he had never dreamed were gradually revealed." [ There's a pause, while Dorian flips the pages and continues reading. ]

"'I am so sorry, Harry,' he cried, 'but really it is entirely your fault. That book you sent me so fascinated me that I forgot how the time was going.' 'Yes, I thought you would like it,' replied his host, rising from his chair. 'I didn't say I liked it, Harry. I said it fascinated me. There is a great difference.'"

[ Dorian closes the book, as he looks to the camera. There's a hint of a melancholy tone in his voice as he continues—somebody's obviously been lost in memory. ] Words written by Oscar Wilde—today's his birthday, by the way. Wear a carnation and take some absinthe in his honor. But the words of the post aren't what I want you to think about: the content is.

Let's talk about books, network. What's your favorite book? Or perhaps your favorite author? And, if those are questions you simply can't answer, what's your favorite genre? And finally, has there ever been a book that so captivated you the way the one Oscar wrote about captivated me?

Comments

[brushoff]

[ New goal: werewolf on crack. What's the worst that can happen aside from everything? ]

The tentacle bits don't have beaks though, do they? Again, rusty on my Lovecraft.

[deadtective]

[can't be worse than a shapeshifter on acid, come on.]

HP's boring as shit and rarely gets too far past 'aaaah form beyond human comprehension OH NO HE'S CRAZY NOW wow fucking shocker there' so there he's kind of a bust.

But I've seen a couple and it honestly wouldn't surprise me if some of the tentacles had beaks. They've definitely got eyeballs.

[brushoff]

Mmm, that's obnoxious. I don't want anything looking up me while...ah, fun things happen.

[ said in the world's most suggestive tone ]

I'll have to add abominations to my list of things to inevitably run into, by the way. I'm crossing off a lot of supernatural bullshit already.

[deadtective]

Yeah, once you get the stench on you they all start swarming. It's a fucking pain in the ass.

You're like a whole year late on the eldritch horror shit, though. There used to be one hanging around here but she booked it home.

[brushoff]

Ah shit, really? Who was it?

[deadtective]

Nysrog. With a fucking name like that I'm kinda surprised nobody else seemed to notice.

[someone's a little salty.]

[brushoff]

[ aaaaaaaaand then the dots connect. ]

You know, that makes so much more sense. I thought she was strictly demonic but nope, eldritch abomination explains a lot.

[deadtective]

Oh man, no fucking way. Demons have an eyeball quota they're not allowed to go over.

[brushoff]

She had so many eyeballs, [ he can't help but mutter. ]

[deadtective]

Tell me about it, I popped one open once.

[brushoff]

She probably deserved it.

[deadtective]

She fucking deserved way more than that.

[brushoff]

Ah. Let me guess, bad blood between the two of you?

[ soooo much bad blood it seems ]

[deadtective]

Not really, I only met her once.

[it's c o m p l i c a t e d]

[brushoff]

It must have been an absolutely horrible first impression.

[deadtective]

Nah, just a clear one. But I meant it doesn't really fucking matter either way now, right? She fucked off.

[brushoff]

Of course it matters: she might get Ported back. And then, I'll know precisely who to bitch with when her 'I'm a creepy abomination who can't pass for human' schtick runs thin.

[deadtective]

That's a bad pick, dude, I charge for bitching sessions.

[brushoff]

Then it's a good thing for you that I'm filthy rich.

[deadtective]

Not for long now that you tipped me off to jack up my prices.

[brushoff]

I'm afraid if that's the case, I'll just be a one-time customer.

[deadtective]

One's all I need.

[brushoff]

You're going to jack up prices that much?

[deadtective]

Gotta maximize efficiency, man.

[brushoff]

Dunno. I might be wonderful enough to be a repeat customer.