maskormenace | Video - under cut for language

[Daryl does not like video, but he's agitated and didn't feel writing this out would come across with the proper amount of outrage.]

Whoever sent this shit ain't funny.

[He can't really post a screen shot of what he's talking about, so instead he just reads a few of these off.]

"-Take more showers. Work on personal hygiene. Visit a barber at least once a month."

I take showers every fucking day. And my hair ain't no one's business but my own!

"-Get better taste in movies. If you must like Disney films for children, consider Nightmare Before Christmas instead of Pete’s Dragon."

FUCK YOU! Pete's Dragon's a great movie!

[There are actually worse things on the list of 'Resolutions' he'd been given. Two in particular that are more the source of his anger than then one's he going off about, but putting it out there would be showing too much vulnerability when he already didn't have a proper outlet for taking his anger out on whoever sent it. So it's just these few that he'll be publicly raging about and making it look like he has the shortest fuse ever.]

"-Learn to shoot better. But not at people."

Show your fucking face and I'll show you how good I can shoot! You can take your resolutions and shove 'em up your ass!

[With that he tosses the phone down hard on the couch and it bounces before he fumbles with it and shuts it off.]

[[All responses will be Audio]]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

If we're picking a Disney film, then pick Fantasia. Pete's Dragon is far too long and drops a plot thread every fifteen minutes.

It do not! It keeps to it the whole way through. It's about finding family. Kid escapes from one that ain't really family and makes his own with Elliot and the lighthouse girl and lighthouse girl gets her sailor back 'cause Elliot finds him for her.

And anyway, Fantasia's got no plot.

Right, but the film absolutely forgets about the lighthouse girl's husband until the last thirty minutes of the film! And if you say that the film's about finding family, then it makes the entire plotline with Jim Dale's character, that snake oil salesman, it makes his entire plotline pointless!

[ these are two grownass men arguing about the plots of Disney movies. ]

Besides, Fantasia's not supposed to have a plot. It's art.

It do not! She talks about him to Pete and Pete asks Elliot to go find him. It'd be forgetting about him if he never showed up. The snake oil salesman was there to give the Gogan's a way to be a more credible threat to Pete's safety. He wanted the dragon, they wanted Pete. They was terrible jokes that he had every right to be afraid of, but once they was out of the swamp and Pete was in Passamaquoddy, they had no way of really tracking him down or catching him without outside help. He was given motivation to support their actions.

[Better than arguing about their hair.]

If you're tellin' me Pete's Dragon's bad cause of it's plot, you don't go tellin' me to watch another one that ain't got one! It don't make no sense.

Right, but there's literally thirty minutes in the middle of the film where the husband isn't mentioned and we're treated to 'wacky hijinks' and absolutely unbearable songs before oh shit, wait, we totally forgot about the husband, let's have that dragon find him in the literal last five minutes of the film.

Pete's Dragon attempts to have a plot so it's all the more noticeable when the plot falls apart. Fantasia makes no pretense at a plot in the first place! It's vignettes.

Being bad at pacing don't mean the plot falls apart. They had quotas about how much wacky hijinks and songs they had to put in those flicks back then. You ever see Chitty Chitty Bang Bang? That one's got no plot.

[Of course it wasn't a Disney flick, but it was the same era of movies]

And if I'm gonna watch a series of animated vignettes, I'd rather watch Heavy Metal.

Yes, but the songs are shit. That one about "I've got a bill of sale" is downright dreadful.

[ there's a pause and a wrinkle of his nose before Dorian acquiesces, ] You're right on one thing. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang's rubbish. However, what the hell is Heavy Metal? Aside from a genre, of course.

It's a movie from around 81 or 82. Bunch of stories from the magazine animated and set to music. Tackles sex and war and all sorts of shit and they're all connected loosely by this evil orb that influences events to be as bad as possible.

You ain't heard of it? Figured the magazine'd be right up your alley.

Was it American? I spent most of the 1980s over in the UK—it's entirely possible it might not have crossed the pond. Sex and war does sound up my alley, though.

Yeah. You can pick up Heavy Metal in most bookstores that carry magazines. Movie can probably be found online.

I'll actually have to look that one up then. I spent most of the 1980s engaged in...other pursuits. [ cocaine, partying, & sleeping with Toby ] It's entirely possible that I simply missed the film.

It's trip if you watch it stoned.

[Daryl never did hard drugs, but he wasn't opposed to the occasional blunt and the idea of Dorian's first time with it being stoned out - particularly for the B-52 sequence - had him privately amused. If the man did it, he'd have to ask Toby how it went. A full play by play.]

Edited 2017-01-03 00:41 (UTC)

You know, if I can find the damn thing I'll seriously consider that.

[ stoned = uh hell yes. Dorian is a big fan of drugs. ]

Video - under cut for language

permavid!

permavid!

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject