(no subject)

[lapwing]

[On the network is what appears to be a young boy, about 12 or 13 years old. For a moment, he stares quite soulfully at the video output impossibly deep, black eyes, and then pokes at the screen with one fingernail.]

Not even a proper imp in there, how's that for you...?

[He pulls back and mimes clearing his throat. A voice far, far more booming than is fit for the child's face resounds across the feed.]

Right, broadcast. AHEM. This is just a friendly, non-suspicious question, inquiring on when the next coup or violent overthrow of this government is going to be. Not that I'm actually advocating it, I just know you humans really can't resist.

I'm pretty handy with a popcorn machine if anyone can provide good seats.

Comments

[dendarii]

You're less dangerous than other, sharper implements.

[lapwing]

I thought we were steering clear of your love life.

[dendarii]

[ Snapping abruptly: ]

Shut up.

[lapwing]

Oh. Ew.

[ They swap back over to Kitty's feed. ] Seriously, are you INTO that?

[rathercommon]

Am I into...what?

[dendarii]

You're sure you can't get him to shut up?

[lapwing]

Oh, not even disclosing. Hows that for a behaviour?

[dendarii]

She likes me just fine.

[lapwing]

Sure. Sure. I'm here to break your will down and grind your resolution to dust, not break up your wedding plans.

[dendarii]

... There's no plans to break up. And that's fine.

[lapwing]

Which bit is fine?

[dendarii]

No plans. For marriage, I mean.

[lapwing]

Oh good, looks like she's got some taste still.

[dendarii]

Her taste or lack thereof is her decision.

[lapwing]

Oh, no arguing on that point. She's got way too much stubborn to even bother trying.

[dendarii]

Just so. I could sooner teach a cat to talk.

[rathercommon]

Look, I like him, all right? You haven't even got a sex drive, or sex bits, you're not allowed to comment.

[lapwing]

I'm pretty sure it makes me extra qualified to comment. Impartial and all that.

[rathercommon]

It does not! It makes you incapable of understanding what's appealing.

[lapwing]

Oh I completely understand. It's all of those hormones you've got going on, firing off impulses and electrical chemical signals. It's a bleeding mess.

[rathercommon]

Don't you try to imply that I'm some...love-mad idiot.

[lapwing]

[ There's no comment. It's kind of worse. ]

[rathercommon]

[ She coughs a little noise of outrage. ]

I'm never mad. I'm always very sane.

[lapwing]

I'm not saying it's your fault.

[rathercommon]

Oooh, right, it's just my womanly hormones driving me mad. Of course. I just can't help myself 'cause of my woman-brain.