O4 👶 ANON TEXT;

[pillz]

(cw murder, survivor's guilt, brainwashing?, jokes at the expense of trauma survivors, etc.)

good morning assholes

[(it's 3:00pm est.)]

u all remember the blackout shit mid jan 2017. count dooku rounded up 1direction to look @ the prison breakout using our magical superpowers. this is what we found.

short: electronics went out. nobody got any idea why but pi adachi believes its strictly tech. b4 they knew it, prisoners got loose & it was a fuckin massacre inside the compound walls

guards: some of them wuz evil. obv an inside job. these fucks maybe straight up disappeared pre riot? the ones who r left remember hearing a coupla them speaking german b4 they fucked off. then some of the guards wuz good. lots of the ones who didn't split got teh shit murdered out of them in gross ways. belt strangles, shivs in scandalous places. u should send the families fruit baskets. somethign classy. no melon. the survivors r pretty traumatized & sad about their friends. do not add melon to injury.

prisoners: got their hands on weapons hid all over the place. bathrooms, buttholes, walls, u know. seems likely some extra shit got snuck in or turned a blind eye to. the rioters were in weird shape psychologically. pissed @ the law & imports, but in a way that wuz ramping up kind of maybe unnatural while they were behind bars. dr. chilton needs 2 get them some ketamine therapy. make buttsex not riots.

other weird shit: 1 russian nullifier device found on scene. govt took it. it was totqlly broken anyway.

govt: wont give us surveillance tapes or let us go past the tape & there was tape fucking everywhere

Comments

[brushoff]

Pointing out the obvious here, but you COULD have said no.
Make Dooku do it.
He likes to hear himself talk.

[ said in a deliberately public space, HA HA, YOU CAN'T CHOKE HIM OVER THE INTERNET, ASSHOLE. ]

[pillz]

i like hearing myself
type
& we all know dookies is a asshole, can u imagine him reminding everybody to send gift baskets
thats all me and my community spirti

[brushoff]

I'd pay good money to hear him remind everybody to send gift baskets.

[pillz]

how much are we talking abojt

[brushoff]

Depends on what sort of statement he'll make!
He's got a voice for radio, someone make that man say "pineapple" in his serious voice.

[pillz]

sure if that's what ure into
how much is pineapple money

[brushoff]

I'm into making Dooku look silly
and idk 150?

[pillz]

thats not bad. imma see what i can do 4 u
in the meantime
no reaction to the meddlin europeans?

[brushoff]

Not really?
What a shock, the rest of the world wouldn't mind it if someone put out a hit on the rest of the imPorts
Oh no wait it isn't.

[pillz]

turd lords kinna dumb gunning 4 people who can come back to life many times sa we want though right

[brushoff]

I never SAID they were smart!
Just that it shouldn't be surprising.

[pillz]

yeha all right
what did u do, bunk down wit ur husband & play monopoly wit ice tea a few days

[brushoff]

[ he got drunk and moped and fell into a pit of depression! :D ]

The husband's ported out.
I mostly spent the time reading.

[ that is a goddamn lie ]

[pillz]

oh
id b crying as i fap so
good job soldier

[brushoff]

We all cope in our own ways.
Some involve crying and masturbation
Others involve reading and getting blackout drunk.

cw sexual vulgarity idk if i warned for it before

[pillz]

wuz it a gay porny book & did u touch yourself after a few glasses
,multipurpose kleenex
i feel like we could both win int his scenario

[dun_moch]

The two of you are aware that I can see every word of this, are you not?

[brushoff]

Does that mean I can get you to do it for less?

[dun_moch]

What is your second guess, Mister Gray?

[brushoff]

Probably that you don't want to do it in the first place, you spoilsport.

[dun_moch]

Well done. I had expected it would take you at least three more guesses before you arrived at the truth.

[brushoff]

You say that but I was REALLY TORN between "you don't want to do it" and "I should offer you more money."

[dun_moch]

I may have been open to a more reasonable offer. But I doubt that you would have been able to meet my price.

[brushoff]

You underestimate the investments I've made.

[dun_moch]

Do I? Make me an offer, then.