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[thunderriere]

[ the video opens on the handsome face and stupidly broad shoulders of a rather cheery-looking man, which is a little at odds with the fact that he's in a holding cell in a Heropan police station. it looks like he's wearing some sort of leather-like tunic, like a lightweight armor; there's a bright blue pauldron covering one shoulder, the other bare, and there's clearly a cape attached on one side, but not the other. his hair and beard are both short, neatly trimmed, and his smile is a friendly, genuine sort — again, a little at odds with the scene behind him, where the sliding crossed-bar metal door separates the man from the wider view of the police station, several uniformed officials in the background going about their jobs. ]

[ also, he's got an eye patch. metal. ... literally, it's made of metal. there's a wicked-looking scar running beneath it, from his brow and across his cheek, so the covering is probably deserved. ]

Hello there, New Earth.

[ he waves at the camera. ]

It's quite a different planet than the last Earth I visited. A little less familiar, a little less besieged by aliens. Fewer wizards, maybe. Still mostly human, though, you've got that going for you.

[ although there's some din of other people in the ambient background noise, there's a suspicious-sounding cough caught suspiciously-close to the microphone; the man's single eye flicks away from the camera to instead stare at the suspiciously off-screen source. ]

What? Oh, come on, would you really have preferred an Earth full of Dark Elves?

[ he continues to stare at this suspicious someone off-screen; the camera shifts a little to the side, and starts to turn— ]

[ —there's a somewhat comedic-sounding yelp, and then... some sort of bird call? the camera jostles violently before being covered by something dark. ]

[ a heavy sigh follows. ]

Now you're just being absurd.

[ after a moment, the feed comes back to show a pretty brunette woman in a blue dress, looking like she tumbled in from a semi-casual renaissance faire. she stands stiffly, her arms crossed, sending an absolutely murderous glare towards the first speaker. her lips are pressed tightly together, and she seems to have no intention of actually saying anything. from elsewhere-further off-camera, a younger man's voice: dude! do Beyonce next! ]

You'll have to excuse my brother here. [ the one-eyed man indicates the brunette woman with an extended thumb; there are smears of blood on his fingers, a splash of red all across his palm. he smiles, but it's quite Tired. ] He's a bit of a coward when it comes to meeting new people. Always makes a bad first impression. I can't take him anywhere.

I told you I wouldn't include myself in this. [ the woman (apparently the man's "brother") finally speaks, but her words are hushed and angry, and directed at the one-eyed man. she reaches toward the camera—it swings away from her before she can grab it, and the picture is a blur of color. her voice continues from off-screen in an anxious hiss: ] I'm trying to keep a low profile. Stop talking before you completely ruin it.

If you wanted to keep a low profile, you shouldn't have gotten us arrested the day we got here.

[ the picture finally refocuses from a different angle; it's further away from our idiot leads, who are clearly distracted by their argument. ]

How was I supposed to know they'd overreact? You're the expert on this backwoods planet. [ he isn't given chance to interrupt; the woman barrels on, as if her few minutes of silence had only allowed her thoughts to build up pressure for a flood: ] We don't even have to be here, you know. I can just walk us out whenever we like. This cell isn't even enchanted. [ a beat. ] It's pitiful, really.

We're not becoming fugitives of human law because you don't want to pay bail after you stabbed a man in a diner.

[ the man rolls his single eye and shrugs his shoulders, but looks once more at the camera. he smiles, deflective. just a little spat between siblings! that's normal! ]

Sorry. Where are my manners? I am Thor, son of Odin of Asgard. Thank you for bringing me and my brother to your planet. Unfortunately, I've already had my share of being imprisoned this week, so if any of you would like to barter for my release, that'd be great, thanks.

[ he waves his hand toward the camera — yep, still covered in blood — and the feed ends there. ]

Comments

[izanyagi]

He does that...

[He can't remember a god of stabbings but okay.]

Let's see. Thor is the most known of Odin's sons, so that would be you...well the you in my world. He's known for his hammer, being the god of lightning, thunder, storms and fighting giants.

[He carefully chooses his words for the next one.]

Baldr is also part of a popular myth where his mother went around asking every living thing not to harm him as she had a dream where he would die. The only thing she forgot to ask was the mistletoe plant. Gods began to treat hitting Baldr with anything as a sport since he couldn't be touched. However the story doesn't end well, as you probably imagine.

[thunderriere]

[ it is nice being the most well-known of Odin's children, and... well, the list is pretty accurate. he's fought many giants, and many other beings besides. the loss of mjolnir still stings, though. ]

In your story... who is that boy's mother?

[izanyagi]

Thor or Baldr? I think they had different mothers...

[There's a bit of discomfort as he speaks.]

Thor-sama...I hope this isn't insulting to you. It's just very different in my world, that's all.

[thunderriere]

Oh, no, don't worry. I'm not insulted. You're only human.

[izanyagi]

[He can't help but laugh at that remark.]

I guess so!

[Maybe not a good time to mention he took down a few gods and has one living in his brainspace.]

Is saying that supposed to make me feel better? [Which reminds him;] Has anyone been able to help you yet?

[thunderriere]

Yes, of course. You are human, aren't you?

[izanyagi]

That's good.

[He assumes the yes of course means someone is helping them. At the question, he pinches himself on video to make sure.]

Yeah, I'm pretty sure I'm a human...Yu Narukami to be exact. Sorry, I just found it funny when you said it that way...humans aren't completely ignorant. I have a few tricks up my sleeves.

[thunderriere]

I meant you no offense. Really, I'm quite familiar with how crafty and intelligent your people can be. I've spent a lot of time on Earth recently.

[ but you are so small... and petty... and die so quickly... ]

[izanyagi]

Alright, none taken! So are those facts I know about our Thor in our myths a little bit correct in your world or just a wild exaggeration?

[It's true they do get to die rather quickly.]

[thunderriere]

I am indeed the God of Thunder, and the storms that hail them. I have fought a great many beings across many realms. Some giants. Not terribly many. I had a hammer, Mjolnir, but that was destroyed a few days ago.

[izanyagi]

I'm sorry about your hammer.

[:(]

I guess your brother isn't any of the names I mentioned either, is he?

[thunderriere]

My brother's name is his own to give.

[ he doesn't want to get stabbed when he looks like jane okay, leave him alone. ]

[izanyagi]

That's fine! I'll try to figure it out then. And hopefully you'll be out soon so we can meet in person. I have some lightening powers too, although probably none like yours.

Maybe I can tell you the myths of Thor we have in my world. There's a few funny ones.

[thunderriere]

...

[ I'm sorry about that time I turned you into a frog. ]

Right... Save those tales for if we meet.

[izanyagi]

Alright! Did you find out where you'll be staying? Well before you ended up in jail that is...