1 ❀ video

[mattelrealist]

[ The feed opens on an attractive woman sitting on a standard-issue Heropan Housing couch, smiling with friendly demeanor at the camera. She has long, shimmery blond hair tied up in a high ponytail, bright blue eyes, and eyelashes thick enough to smother a fire. She's definitely the type to know how to prepare to be on camera, because that makeup is flawless; you can't even see her pores. (If... she even has them... ?)

She waves at the camera. ]

Good evening, everyone! I'm Barbie. I arrived here a few weeks ago, but things have been so crazy, I haven't had a chance to talk to you all! I'm super excited to meet you.

Now, I'll admit, becoming a "Registered Hero" isn't what I had planned for this month... or this year! But I've heard about what sort of trouble this place is in, and there's no way I can turn down a request for help so dire. There are so many dangers here... like spies! And kidnappers! And, worst of all... undersized sunglasses!

[ Conspiratorial, with her hand near her mouth for a secret: ] That's a fashion misdemeanor in Malibu. [ And with that out of the way, she straightens back up, her expression warm and welcoming. For someone that looks like she walked out of a makeup commercial (or maybe one for shampoo?), her friendliness and bubbly mood both seem very sincere. ]

While I'm here, I'm going to do everything I can to help. I may only be a toothpaste spokesmodel right now—

[ In what is clearly a practiced gesture, Barbie slips an object out of her purse without looking away from the camera, and for a short, smiling pose brandishes a tube of Gum Belle^® brand toothpaste—and did her teeth just sparkle on cue? That had to be a trick of the light, right?—before slipping it out of sight as if the whole promo never happened. ]

—But if you need a doctor, or a gymnastics coach, or an engineer, or a fashion designer, or a life guard, or an astronaut, or a dolphin trainer... well, you get the idea! Or even if you just need a friend to talk to, I'll be right here in Heropa.

I hope we can all be great friends.

Comments

video;

[brushoff]

I blame John Lennon for the trend of undersized sunglasses. [ Dorian's tone is equally conspiratorial, like they're talking about something utterly horrible instead of...sunglasses. but hey, this is Barbie and he had to talk to her (because it's Barbie) and better talking about sunglasses than anything else. ]

Those little round sunglasses he wore have, unfortunately, become somewhat of a cultural fad--despite the fact that they look terrible on most.

[mattelrealist]

Small lenses are fine in England... There's hardly enough sun to ever need them there!

[brushoff]

But the problem is, people try to wear them other places. I've done some traveling in America, and people still insist on wearing those here.

[mattelrealist]

But not to the beach, right?

[brushoff]

Probably even to the beach.

[mattelrealist]

[ A sharp inhale of shock!! ]

That's so... reckless!

[brushoff]

Isn't it though? It makes me worry about their tastes.

[mattelrealist]

Everyone had their own style! It's fantastic to express yourself the way you want. If people are happy with their style, I'm happy for them!

[ 100% sincere. ]

[brushoff]

There's a difference between 'your own style' and an utter lack of taste.

[mattelrealist]

I think everyone has a sense of taste, but there's no harm in learning new styles and changing up what you like. It all depends on the attitude.

[brushoff]

I'd agree that attitude plays a major part in this. But haven't you ever seen someone whose fashion sense was just utterly hopeless?

[mattelrealist]

Of course not! [ She is basically a bottle of glitter, personified. Dollified. Whatever. ] Everyone has ways they can improve—and everyone's capable of improving! Whether it's putting together an outfit, or a robot, or a birthday cake, there's always something new that can be added to make it better.

[brushoff]

Well yes, I- [ wait, go back like twenty steps ] did you say a robot?

[mattelrealist]

I did! [ because girls can do anything ok ]

[brushoff]

Mind telling me more about this robot?

[mattelrealist]

Oh, it was just an example! [ A little embarrassed. ] I haven't built my own just yet.

[brushoff]

Well that's [ reassuring ] good to know.

But all those professions and not mechanical engineer? You're slacking.