text - be gay do crimes

[h2no]

so what the fuck is up with that persistent urge to ruin your own life?

Comments

[justlittle]

Technically, yes.
I just don't see the point in making bad jokes about it.

[h2no]

sometimes that's all you can do
would you rather i insult what the people of your planet went through by giving you pity?

[justlittle]

[ ....... ]

Fine.

Got any more animal puns?

[h2no]

i can't think of them on the spot!

arceus i don't know
what do you say when an onix busts out the wall next to you

[justlittle]

What the fuck is an onix?

[h2no]

it most certainly isn't a rude little turd

[justlittle]

Fine.

What do you say when an onix (whatever that is) busts out of the wall next to you?

I'm on tenter hooks.

[h2no]

that was








onixpected

[justlittle]

[ A minute later, after a good, healthy groan. ]

...Right.

Now, will you tell me what an onix is?

[h2no]

rock snake
that's not a dick joke
it's literally a giant 30ft snake made out of living rock

cw: gross talk

[justlittle]

Does it eat and shit like a normal living animal?

Re: cw: gross talk

[h2no]

yes
it's huge
and nasty

[justlittle]

Are its shits made of rock too?

[h2no]

no idea, actually!

[justlittle]

What does it eat?

[h2no]

rocks
so i guess it would make sense to poop out smaller rocks

[justlittle]

A sentient rock, eating rocks.

Is that cannibalism?

[h2no]

probably?
it's not like cannibalism is weird for certain species
it's probably like a human eating a cow
or a cow eating grass

[justlittle]

Cows aren't made of grass.

[h2no]

grass also isn't sentient

[unless it's a grass type, but he can't be assed getting into that. also, grass is alive and rocks aren't? ugh, look, science is hard.]

[justlittle]

I guess. Do onixes strictly eat non-sentient rocks? How do you know if a rock is sentient or not?

[h2no]

they usually try to move out the way of being eaten?
i'm sure there have been documented cases of onixes eating other rock types on purpose or by accident

[justlittle]

There are other types of sentient rocks?

[h2no]

yes?

[justlittle]

Exactly what kind of world do you come from?
Are there sentient mountains?