2 ☁ Turtleneck of the woods [video]

[heartboxer]

[ Unlike most interactions with Armstrong, the characteristic loud, friendly smile that he usually portrays on his face is replaced with a more serious and grave look. His shirt is, like most occasions, turned off as his eyebrowless face squints and glares at the feed with alternating forms of intensity.

He's trying to set a mood. Emphasis on trying. The alternations of intensity underneath his brow look inconsistent at best and like he accidentally squirted lemonade in his eyes at worst. ]

It appears now that, for some time, justice has taken a more passive role in both the eyes of the U.S. government and imPorts. Political reasons aside, there is no justification to injure civilians on the behalf of a government that is now cutting our funding. We remain each other's valuable resources for both fighting injustice from wherever it may be. We cannot remain reliant on a system that has no intention on looking out for us.

[ A close observer will notice that wherever Armstrong is right now, it's really cold. His breath is visible, creating tiny clouds of vapor as he shivers from time to time. ]

I expect all who take the term Hero to stand against injustice and perform true heroic values! [ His voice booms before a smile slowly erupts on his face. The more familiar side of Armstrong takes over. Good cop, bad cop. ]

Now, for the real reason I'm talking on here...! I wish to ask, does anyone have abilities that change seasonally? [ He remains still and focused. ] It appears that, for summer, I was given the talent of producing Hawaiian shirts by thought but now that it is fall....

[ He starts to triumphantly flex before a bright light envelops his torso. It fades to reveal an American Flag turtleneck. ]

It appears Heropa wants me prepared for the seasons, as now I can make turtlenecks! Would anyone want one?

Comments

voice

[gonstop]

[Okay, he doesn't really feel like commenting on all the political stuff going around, but turtlenecks? Turtlenecks.

Tentatively:] Are they free?

voice

[heartboxer]

Of course they're free! [ Armstrong stands tall and proud as he solemnly nods. ]

It costs nothing to me to make things like these. What design would you like? Any material? [ the imagination is his limit! ]

[gonfreaky]

Can I get one for my friend?

[heartboxer]

Of course...! Do you have any idea what they like? [ Awww ;w; Armstrong's participating in the Greatest Gift of All. ]

[private, audio]

[hands4healing]

[Urgent voice.]

Major Armstrong, did you know that Mr. Kimblee is here in this world?

[...oops.]

And, uh, that's nice about your sweaters. Hi. It's Winry.

[Nope, not harried at all.]

[private, audio]

[heartboxer]

I am very aware of his presence. [ His voice is polite and calm, oddly enough for a man like Armstrong. There's a part of him that's peculiarly distant. ] I wish I didn't have to be. [ but he's kinda hard to ignore. ]

Are you worried Winry?

[braided_icarus]

We're probably going to need the shirts soon enough with the weather getting cooler.

[Not specifiying the whole Alaska thing but others have probably figured anyway that he's being dragged along with the Major General and the rest.]

[Privated]

We are making sure someone is keeping an eye on Crimson though, right? He's not exactly one I'd consider having 'heroic values' as you put it.

private

[heartboxer]

Correct! There will be camouflage turtlenecks that will be passed around very soon.

[ Armstrong nods his head solemnly before he addresses his first personal topic. ]

I have not been involved in restricting his potential here, but I do see the reasons on why we'd have to. [ He pauses. ] He's not exactly a favorite person of mine either. [ There's another pause as Armstrong starts to look a bit sad. ]

But your brother was. If you need anything Edward, please ask. [ He can't imagine what it must be like for Edward to lose Al, even if it's temporarily and he's been meaning to offer his support for quite some time now. ]

[nadezda]

[ OH GOD THAT TURTLENECK NO. ]

What alternative would you suggest?

[heartboxer]

Perhaps the recent wave of PR in our favor will be able to readjust our leader's opinions on us and they will start to grant us rights. But, until then, I think we could possibly arrange a strike on doing anything military involving. [ Said the guy currently going to Alaska to defend America. ]

video/

[ktfod]

[He's not even going to touch what's said first. A lot is going on and those helping out should know all this already. This political business really needs to be approached delicately and by people who know what they're doing. He's smart, hell, he knows he is, but all this isn't his fight. He'll defend any he can though, and he knows he doesn't need to say so. Whatever he needs to do, it'll be done when it needs to be. He can't just run ahead anymore...]

[So that aside-]

Turtlenecks? [Reeeelatively fashionable, a Sanada thumbs up there. He's all about looking good. So yes. Turtlenecks. No to- the flag though. Isn't that a bit too flashy?]

Actually yeah. You can make them different sizes, right? [Though if you give him one that big it just looks like a challenge...]

[heartboxer]

I can but the problem is, they generate on my body. Luckily, I can re-transmute them to a fixed state if I rip them but there is an interesting caveat for using my powers.

[ He's not quite sure how else to explain it. Even if it's not a big deal, he should at least caution that smaller sweaters are going to be a bit weaker since he might have to transmute it whole. ]

[video]

[extirpations]

[Never let it be said Kimblee misses a chance to be a dick reconnect with an old war buddy.]

What a... unique talent Strong Arm. How very useful for you I'm sure.

[Yeah that thing is hideous and you have no taste.]

Such an inspiring speech, I'm glad to see you're not letting the recent events ruin your good spirits. Particularly as it seems no one can agree on what are considered 'heroic values' at the moment.

[video]

[heartboxer]

[ Armstrong's face is, at first, suspiciously similar to a Sister Sister (pick Tia or Tamara) and it greatly resists the pressure to just shout, "go home Roger Kimblee!" because Armstrong is skeptical on if Kimblee has any intentions besides mock him through the confines of language. ]

I'm a very talented man, Crimson Lotus. [ Not a lie in the slightest, but also not the most relevant thing to say. ] Who have you been debating heroism with? [ Cause lbr Armstrong really would rather do something else. ]

[video]

[yatagarasu]

You're right, Mr. Armstrong! [Kay pumps her fist into the air.] I'll do my best to be a hero!

[video]

[heartboxer]

Kay! I believe you're one of the most heroic women here! There's nothing more you can do! [ no no plz stay inside and away from dramatic heroics, he doesn't need you getting injured or kidnapped or attacked by one of those anti-imPort organizations with animal names. ]

[voice]

[forsometimenow]

[There's some barely-contained giggling.]

You have the power to create clothing?

[voice]

[heartboxer]

Only shirts, and the types of shirts change each season but yes, I can limitedly produce clothing.

[video]

[thebestseller]

How stylishly patriotic.

[video]

[heartboxer]

I have to show that I'm still willing to support a country that supports me after what I've just said. [ nervous laughter. ]

video.

[wotters]

[ That is...





The coolest power. Ever!!!! ]

Wah! I want one! With a sea otter on it. Hmm, Nitori-senpai would probably want a duck. [ He has a lot of duck things. ] Can you do that? Can I ask for two?

video.

[heartboxer]

Yes! You can indeed ask for however many you wish, but please do not be too greedy. I can't stand here all day and make every shirt in the world! [ Although Armstrong totally would if you asked him. He'd just get a little astonished around the fiftieth one.

Armstrong will quickly generate both of the sweaters. One will be covered in a festive looking otter, holding a shell gently to its chest. The other will have a bunch of mallards flying in a v-formation gently across the back. ]

How are these for your liking?!

video;

[clinomaniac]

[He likes this style. The real reason to talk to a group should always be the cheery one. Even if the non-real reason is infinitely more important. He likes you, Armstrong.]

One for every day of the week. How much?

video;

[heartboxer]

[ Alex Louis Armstrong would rather sparkle valiantly through tough times than not sparkle at all! #shineupyourlife ]

I do not require money as this was a free gift to me so the labor should be a free gift to everyone else! However, you are going to have to be specific for the seven different types of shirts you want!

voice;

[bodyshots]

Sign me up for a sweater, big guy.

[Yang's voice is light, but she's not happy. Not in the slightest.]

Gotta say, I kinda agree with you. How mad do you think they'd be if we tried to find another government to work for?

voice;

[heartboxer]

What type do you want?

[ Armstrong will take off his shirt in preparation for making another sweater. ]

While outsourcing our abilities might sound like a good idea, I believe it would be grounds for the American government to capture us as treasonous representatives. That, and, chances are our employer might be just as strict. After all, they would see our capabilities for revolt and act accordingly and they might not have the adequate resources for us. We're very much stuck where we are, for better or for worse but that doesn't mean we're powerless.

[glassbox]

Is there anythin' y'can't make, one way or another?

[heartboxer]

I cannot make specific patterns on this shirt that I do not know about, so if you asked me about cultural characters I would not be able to produce them if I am unfamiliar with them! I also cannot make anything besides turtlenecks in the season of fall. It appears Hawaiian Shirts were limited to summertime only! Also, I cannot make very good flapjacks. [ So there, Lil. You got three answers. ]