III, Voice;

[malodorous]

Right, um. I have a question.

Is it lying to little kids if I get a job pretending to be Santa Claus?

I mean, I know it's lying, I guess I just... Is it a mean thing to do? 'Cause I have this reindeer, and somebody offered, and extra money's never bad, you know? But I'd feel bad if I was lying like that, and if it might be, like, morally questionable.

I didn't know people went around telling kids they're Santa, that's all. Is that just a thing they do here? A-okay?

Comments

voice;

[notafishwhisperer]

As long as you stay in character and keep them entertained, it should be fine? I think most kids are smart enough to know you're not him. They still want to have the experience.

voice;

[malodorous]

Oh. That might make sense.

How's Santa supposed to act, then? He's all... happy, right?

permavoice;

[bythestorybook]

I don't think Santa minds himself, for what it's worth.

[malodorous]

[ ... ]

Okay, what?

[video]

[hands4healing]

Who's Santa Claus, and why do you need to pretend to be him? Is he another ImPort?

[She's confused. She hasn't heard this name before.]

[malodorous]

He's, uh... He's this story guy. He's supposed to bring presents to kids on Christmas.

Apparently, around here they like to have somebody pretend to be him to ask kids what they want and stuff. And take pictures. I don't really get it, but hey. There's a lot of stuff here already that's weird. What's one more thing?

voice;

[fistofthejoestar]

I don't think there's anything wrong with making people happy. The children should already know that you're simply helping Father Christmas.

[Father Christmas. because, you know, the accent wasn't enough of a giveaway that he's English]

voice;

[malodorous]

[ Makes more sense than an inexplicably American-sounding Disney!Norwegian fella. ]

You think so? I wasn't sure what people were telling their kids, here.

It'd just be a jerk move to get somebody's hopes up, I think.

voice;

[uncurse]

Something's gotta help parents maintain the magic. I'd say you're doing those kids a favor, even if it is a lie.

voice;

[malodorous]

But what if they don't get what they want?

What if they don't get anything?

[ Video ]

[onewiththewild]

What's Santa Claus?

[ Video ]

[malodorous]

He's this fake magic guy that brings kids presents at Christmas if they were were good all year.

[ Video ]

[anthropophagite]

I don't think a white lie like that is problematic. It makes them happy and it gives them hope.

It's nice.

[ Video ]

[malodorous]

See, I'm more worried about the hopes being crushed.

video;

[gonstop]

Why would it be a problem? It's acting, just like any other 'Santa Claus' has to do.

[He could say that hopes are being crushed by this post alone, but he'll hold back on that much.]

video;

[malodorous]

Well, if it's wrong, every other Santa Claus would be wrong, too.

If you tell kids some magical, neat thing is real, it's probably going to be sad for them when it's not true. I guess it depends on how much they buy into it.

video

[you_tried]

You're probably overthinking this.

video

[malodorous]

... Yeah, probably.

audio

[boobwindow]

It's not mean. Kids love these stories and they need something to believe in.

Someone offered you a temp job?

audio

[malodorous]

Yeah. I mean, it's probably just 'cause of Sven, but... Yeah.

I didn't know lots of people dressed up as Santa.

permavoice;

[moded]

What? DUDE! He'd probably think it's totally crash I mean people dressing up like him and making people happy oh! You might even get a thank you letter!

[he's 100% serious and incredibly enthusiastic]

[malodorous]

... Crash?

[ Out of all the things to take away from this reply, he's going to go with "crash." ]

video;

[parallels]

It's not quite lying.

Well it is lying. But for a proper cause? Lying for the greater good. That's the way to put it.

video;

[malodorous]

Isn't the truth usually better in the long run?

[symmachy]

A job is a job.

[malodorous]

There is that undeniable fact.

I'm just trying to make sure I'm not benefitting from somebody else's future emotional trauma.

voice;

[unhand]

What's Santa Claus? Is this some sort of performance? Acting's a bit different from lying, mate.

voice;

[malodorous]

[ Whoa I'm not your mate, buddy. ]

He's some fat guy up north who's supposed to deliver presents to kids, and... I guess pretending to be a Santa Claus might be something like a performance. I don't know.

That doesn't make it sound any more appealing, really.

[braided_icarus]

...Santa? Who?

[Yeah. Ed is in no way the most clued up on this holiday business. At all.]

[malodorous]

Magic saint guy who delivers presents to good children at Christmas.

voice;

[sizetwelve]

[ Cue a dryly amused British woman's voice, Mary Morstan as her tag. ]

You'll need to stuff a pillow under your shirt, or they'll see right through you.

voice;

[malodorous]

Guess so. I'd need the beard, too, right?

[acclimatized]

[ on the back of his fiancée. ]

Yeah mate, you're going to need a paunch and big booming voice. it's not lying; it's just stepping in for the big guy, since he's busy and all that at this time of year.

[malodorous]

... Oh, John. Not you, too.

voice;

[dogsled]

It's certainly morally questionable. That is, I believe that the fact that you question it at all demonstrates moral redemption. It's rare that lies are anything but unnecessary, but these are different circumstances--deception for the sake of...of magic.

The best kind, I think.

voice;

[malodorous]

That's not actually the kind of thing required for magic, I guess, but... Thanks? That's a nice way of putting things, if nothing else.

Voice

[willthaw]

[Anna rambles on for a few minutes, since apparently she looked into the nature of Christmas in this strange new world.]

Ohhhh! I heard about this. There was this "Christmas in July" thing at the mall this summer? Apparently this world takes its holidays very seriously. Christmas the most so, or at least it seems that way. I heard them playing what apparently was Winter Holiday music in September!

Anyways, I don't know. I bet it's probably not mean since it seems to be a pretty big deal and common too. Plus how great would it be for Sven! He'd get to meet lots of kids. Maybe I can get you a big thing of carrots and then they could all feed him, he'd love that!

[The smile she's got is clearly evident in her tone, no face needed to know it's there.]

Voice

[malodorous]

... You're going to over-spoil him.