maskormenace | 001. video

[ the video turns on to show Phoenix looking off at something off screen for a moment almost pensively before looking dead on at the camera with a small smile. ]

I've found myself dealt a hand of cards I'm not sure how to play. ...What makes a hero? Someone who champions the weak... or maybe even just someone who helps as much as they can? Is it the intent, or is it the ability?

[ he pauses for a moment to let that hang up in the air for a minute before chuckling. ] I don't suppose there's some kind of school where we can learn all about Superhero 101, like using superpowers responsibly, for example. Or maybe to compare techniques for rescuing cats out of trees. [ ha ha ha. ]

I suppose I should introduce myself. My name is Phoenix Wright, piano player, and now official superhero. My resume is certainly receiving a long-awaited upgrade, though not exactly the way I expected. [ he has a small chuckle at that, because he can think of so many people more suited to being a bona fide superhero than him. ]

I'm curious about the state of law and law enforcement in this city. If you'll humour me, I'd appreciate anyone involved with the law here to speak up. Or contact me privately.

Oh, and one final thing. Residents of house #25 or anyone nearby. I've contained the fire, but need some help putting it out. [ this is accompanied by a relaxed smile that is wholly inappropriate for his words. what fire, you ask? well, let no one say Phoenix Wright doesn't so much enter a world as crash into it. ]

[ OOC NOTE: text in blue brackets represents Phoenix's own inner narrative, or basically his thoughts! ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ okay he'll relent. ]

No offense taken. Piano playing is both an art and a skill many people don't appreciate. [ including him. ]

... Though I should perhaps mention that I used to work as a lawyer.

... Yeah, you should have.

[ he laughs. ]

You know how these little insignificant details can slip your mind.

Insignificant... Uh huh.

How does a lawyer go from that to pianist?

I was walking down to the courtroom one day, when suddenly, it hit me.

[ he pauses. ] Literally. Someone threw a keyboard out their window, and it landed on me. I guess you could say from that moment on, I knew my destiny was to play piano.

[ With a huff: ]

Are you seriously trying to pull my leg?

[ he doesn't even try ]

That depends, is it working?

I don't have the patience, buddy.

Everyone's always in such a rush nowadays. You should slow down and take the time to enjoy the finer parts of life.

Nobody gets hit with a piano and lives to tell the story.

[ Except superpowered folk, but shh. ]

[ his ability to bullshit is probably a superpower in and of itself. ]

And I would agree with you... if it were a piano. Keyboards are much lighter, and very possible to survive being hit by one of those.

[ Just a low, irritable groaning on her end. ]

You sound a little strained.

[ it's amazing how concerned he manages to sound. ]

[ She wants to wrap her hands around his neck. She promises herself she will do this one day if they ever meet. ]

You sound really annoying, or is it just a game for you?

As a rule, I take my games very seriously.

I am going to hang up on you.

[ that gets a laugh. ]

Well then, before you do, let me thank you for telling me about your experiences in the other world, Ms. Starr. It was... enlightening.

... You're welcome. Try not to set anything else on fire.

[ She manages politely enough before disconnecting. This guy. ]

001. video

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audio | AHAHAHA

audio | she deserves a gold star for dealing with this HAHA

audio | frames this thread on a wall

audio | it'll end up a little crooked for that authentic irritating feel

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