#1; voice

[resoul]

-- So let me get this straight.

[ after a brief silence, there's a long, drawn-out sigh. ]

Alternate universe, something something Cold War, don't care, something something powers and imPorts. See? I was paying attention.

[ no, he wasn't really paying attention, he just picked up a couple of buzzwords. ]

Crazy reality-changing shit doesn't bother me, it's in the family. I can live with it. But, okay, all this mundane stuff? There's crazy and then there's boring. I'm in a different world with a different shitty apartment and a different shitty job? Great. I needed that kind of banal variety in my life. I wasn't getting worked to death enough already.

[ he talks fast. a little too fast, at times, because half of this is just him talking to himself anyway. it's like he's only vaguely aware that anyone's going to even listen to this message. ]

Wait, I know I'm forgetting-- oh, right, there it is, I remember now. What do the big guys do if you say no? Not to the job - hell, no one cares that much about tacos - but the other thing, the big thing. What were they calling it, again?

Video

[runout]

[ The video starts off with a teenage boy smiling widely at the camera. Aw look he's even giving a little wave, how friendly. ]

First time using one of these. Looks like it's working so far.

[ And just like that the smile disappears and the expression on his face isn't all that friendly after all. ]

Alright, here's the deal. Personally? I don't believe any of the klunk I was fed when I showed up here, but we're just gonna go ahead and pretend I bought into it so we can skip any arguments here. All I really wanna know is if any of you have seen a couple of shanks named Newt or Thomas around here. One's blonde. Goofy accent. The other's ugly as klunk. Or hey, anyone calling themselves a Glader works for me.

[ He's leaning back and smiling again, but it's still not very friendly. ]

So what do you say? Anyone wanna make this easy on me for once?