maskormenace | 003

[It's video time with Jeff! Why can't he just do text like normal people, you ask? Because then the world wouldn't be able to see his beautiful face, duh. He's at his desk, lounging like a pro with a full glass of scotch held at eye line, managing to look somewhat thoughtful as he keeps his narrowed eyes on the alcohol before him.]

I went home like a month ago. Did one of those away for a day, lived a year things. Kinda makes you wonder what game the Porter's playing with crap like that, some weird ass brand of temptation and torture all in one.

So, real talk here, imPorts... If we all got told they didn't want us any more, that we got 24 hours to decide whether to go home or stay here forever, what would you do? Is what you built up here enough to keep you? Or are you just gonna be counting down the hours to get back and see those you left behind?

Pretty deep stuff, huh?

[He finally looks to the camera, just starting to reach to turn it off, before...]

Oh! And uh, season one of my show is drawing to a close soon. I know you've all been watching it avidly. Gotta start considering my options for next season, so wanna guest star? Got ideas? Wanna be in the crew? Hit me up. Time to make season two even better than the first. [And he's out, with a final, winning smile.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

So I ask them to put our heard earned cash into some native cases?

It's not your cash, is it? They're going to pay you the same regardless. And you get the publicity - which will be considerable - from your positive impact on the community. Do you know how overloaded public defenders are right now, Mr Winger?

I don't see why I should care.

You like looking good.

I look good already. I don't want people thinking I'm a charity.

Why not? Is a reputation for kindness going to hurt you?

People try to take advantage of nice guys.

Yeah, but it's only the witless who get taken advantage of. You're clever, right?

Well I thought I was, and yet I'm still letting you discuss freebies.

Right. So that argument doesn't work. Whoever tries to take advantage of you can try and fail. What other arguments do you have?

I'm not arguing. This is a discussion with counter points. [Why does he even humor her?! Probably because she's one of the closest things he's got to the immature bickering of Greendale, that's why.]

So maybe I suggest we do some more pro bono work. Then what? Was that the extent of your genius ideas?

Are you the only barrister on the program?

I'm the star of my show, yeah.

So...You're probably pretty experienced, yeah? And good at your job.

Yup. I know what I'm doing.

[His tones taking on some suspicion now, because what is she even trying to get at?]

I bet you could teach, then, yeah?

[Wait. Shit. Abort.]

... Nnnoooo?

So you're not an expert...?

I'm not a teacher. Why would you even ask? You after lessons or some crap?

Yeah, 'cause I'd make a brilliant lawyer. No. A friend of mine needs the help. He's aiming to go into the law, and he's a local so he's got to work hard at it. And he's had a few...issues.

... What kind of issues?

Well, a few...felony convictions.

Pfft, half the lawyers out there are criminals. Well. Every lawyer out there is a criminal, some just haven't been caught yet.

[ Okay, good start. Encouraged: ]

Yeah, well, he got caught. Like, three weeks after his eighteenth birthday. Anyway, now he's twenty-eight and he was totally honest about everything on his law school applications and everything, and he passed the bar, but people are totally weird about hiring him because of his record. But once he can show that he's a good worker, with experience working with imPorts...

Yup. Good luck to him. I'm sure he'll find somewhere eventually.

[Ho hum. Totally ignoring all those hints, kthx.]

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