III/ANONYMOUS TEXT POST

[heckblazer]

how many of you have ever felt personally victimized by batman

just curious

Comments

anonymous text

[batstard]

man but the cops are getting real creative with these internet sting operations aren't they

[heckblazer]

flattery will get you everywhere

and that isn't a no

text; not at at all anonymous; id: Julian Day

[exceptfebruary]

Daily.

[ This isn't necessarily true but how can one resist. ]

text; still anon

[heckblazer]

[ john COULD take the moment to build allies and let some of the bat's staple baddies help lick his wounds, but, nah. ]


are you sure. sound like julying

probably doesn't even know how to anonymous, and all text responses delayed by typing like your nana

[indocile]

What's a batman?

[heckblazer]

a great bloody nuisance usually. if you don't already know you don't need to. better off.

seems like a good post to go anon in

[pummelgranite]

bat.

[heckblazer]

[ must you put cute animal gifs in his perfectly good shitpost YOU ARE THROWING OFF HIS GROOVE

but he does grudgingly leave this here ]

text;

[redhott]

theres someone here who calls himself Batman?

[heckblazer]

Unfortunately.

[scrap_metal]

If that's related to Halloween, you're nearly a month late.

[heckblazer]

unfortunately its a person who apparently thinks halloween is always

video

[helpline]

[ 100% seriously, the Doctor raises his hand. ]

Julian says he's not an actual bat.

text, anonymous

[pummelgranite]

He has many small bats. That's better than being one large bat.

text

[ofgoldenfoil]

Is batman a type of bat? I eat bats, I can get rid of it for you.

[heckblazer]

tempting offer. does a man in a great overdramatic halloween costume suffice

text; UN: Superman

[andaway]

That depends on your definition of -'victimized', really.

[heckblazer]

[ welp. ]

it's a flexible interpretation.

[aggressiveapathy]

by all of gotham

[heckblazer]

yeah i had a hunch

text

[felinefancy]

That's a weirdly specific question. Did the big, bad Bat hurt your feelings?

[But also, same. All of Gotham has been personally victimized by Batman at least a little bit]

[heckblazer]

well not FEELINGS but

i just happen to like my face where it is

you know

without him punching it

Text

[plasthmatic]

Guess how many women I've declined to fuck because they super hardcore admired a white dude with too much money and no superpowers.

...The answer is none, because women aren't stupid and Batman is a male power fantasy.

But seriously, fuck that guy.

[heckblazer]

...where have you been all my life

[slightlyoffchilt]

This is such a Crane thing to say.

[heckblazer]

[ he is... going to let you think that. ]

you think so?

[inmyothertights]

he always seemed kind of incompetent to me

[heckblazer]

[ bless you child. ]

kinda hard to stop crime when you're brooding on rooftops and perpetuating the revolving-door prison system, huh?

[acclimatized]

What's he done to you?

[heckblazer]

lets just say he volunteered me into his rogue's gallery. was minding my own business.

text, anon

[crackshot]

Never has there been a bigger dickweed but if you're crying victim, I'm inclined to think you're being a baby.

[heckblazer]

just a question, mate friend. got history with the bloke guy?

[ he backspaces a few times before sending to get rid of any revealing details on how he talks. not that many British imPorts around, after all. ]

text; id: blue beetle

[deadkord]

I mean, who hasn't?

[heckblazer]

[ someone is not a fan of superheroes but you may have just redeemed yourself slightly. ]

i'd be in good company at least.

anon

[performance]

This is a very supervillain-y question.

[heckblazer]

am I being too on the nose?

anonymous

[gearshifting]

Batman's hardcore. Bet there's plenty of people he's locked up since he got here.

[heckblazer]

you would think so, wouldn't you.

un: sand

[granularity]

Not really.

There was one time, but that REALLY wasn't his fault.

And to be fair, they were attacking him too.

It did give me a real perspective on just how many costume changes the guy's been through over the years, though.