Video - under cut for language

[dirtyredneck]

[Daryl does not like video, but he's agitated and didn't feel writing this out would come across with the proper amount of outrage.]

Whoever sent this shit ain't funny.

[He can't really post a screen shot of what he's talking about, so instead he just reads a few of these off.]

"-Take more showers. Work on personal hygiene. Visit a barber at least once a month."

I take showers every fucking day. And my hair ain't no one's business but my own!

"-Get better taste in movies. If you must like Disney films for children, consider Nightmare Before Christmas instead of Pete’s Dragon."

FUCK YOU! Pete's Dragon's a great movie!

[There are actually worse things on the list of 'Resolutions' he'd been given. Two in particular that are more the source of his anger than then one's he going off about, but putting it out there would be showing too much vulnerability when he already didn't have a proper outlet for taking his anger out on whoever sent it. So it's just these few that he'll be publicly raging about and making it look like he has the shortest fuse ever.]

"-Learn to shoot better. But not at people."

Show your fucking face and I'll show you how good I can shoot! You can take your resolutions and shove 'em up your ass!

[With that he tosses the phone down hard on the couch and it bounces before he fumbles with it and shuts it off.]

[[All responses will be Audio]]

Comments

[beneathbluerafters]

Nightmare Before Christmas is the best one, you just have bad taste!

[brushoff]

Klarion, I mean this in the kindest way possible, but the reason you like Nightmare Before Christmas is precisely because you're the target demographic.

[ TEENAGE MALL GOTH ]

[beneathbluerafters]

[ YOU DON'T KNOW HIM, DAD ]

I doubt that. I think my theory is far more likely.

[brushoff]

[ YOU LIVE IN A BASEMENT AND SHOP AT HOT TOPIC ]

I've got great taste! It's not my fault that I'm surrounded by people who don't appreciate the value of Fantasia.

[beneathbluerafters]

[ ... OKAY, YES TO THE FIRST POINT ]

Fantasia is boring! Half of it is just people talking about the animated sequences! The only good part is the bit with the demon on the mountain, the rest is saccharine.

[brushoff]

It's flowers and dinosaurs! How on Earth is that saccharine?

[beneathbluerafters]

There are unicorns and dancing mushrooms. Those aren't just saccharine, they're downright twee. Besides that, the mouse is an idiot.

[brushoff]

Well I'll grant you the mouse being an idiot. What sort of proper sorcerer's apprentice lets himself get over his head like that?

[beneathbluerafters]

Honestly! If he were any good, he wouldn't have fallen asleep in the first place!

[brushoff]

If he ever shows up here, I'm sure you'll teach him how to be a proper witch-boy.

[beneathbluerafters]

Don't be patronizing. If anything, I'd burn his stupid hat to a crisp and just take the book from him. He obviously isn't using it properly.

[brushoff]

But I love being patronizing.

[ a pause, before. ]

Teekl could probably eat him. I'm sure you have some spells of shrinking or something like that.

[beneathbluerafters]

Oh, no, I'd just enlarge Teekl. He likes being the size of a tiger, hunting larger prey is great fun for him.

[dirtyredneck]

Never seen it and don't give a shit about it.

[beneathbluerafters]

You should, it's the one movie that makes the Christmas holiday bearable! The skeleton king improves it tenfold!

[dirtyredneck]

I don't fucking care about Christmas or making it bearable. It can go die in a lake for all I care.

[beneathbluerafters]

The feeling is mutual, the movie is the only good thing about it!

[dirtyredneck]

If it's about Christmas, it's still shit.

[beneathbluerafters]

You haven't even seen it! If nothing else, you should watch it just to prove Dorian wrong!

[dirtyredneck]

How the hell does that prove him wrong? He's wrong, me watchin' it don't do nothin' to prove shit.

[beneathbluerafters]

If you enjoy it, you prove him wrong. Simple.

[dirtyredneck]

He's wrong about Pete's Dragon being an awful movie, not about the Christmas one. Watching that one don't do nothing for me 'cept waste my time.

[beneathbluerafters]

Tch. Then your tastes are rubbish as well.

[dirtyredneck]

I. Don't. Like. Christmas.

[beneathbluerafters]

Neither. Do. I. It's a saccharine horrorshow. The movie is an exception, and you're a twit for not even thinking about watching it. The skeleton king fixes the stupid holiday.