video;

[storyseeker]

Okay, non-literal show of hands: who got included in that dating app, and did you date yourself? This is important data collection.

[No it's not.]

Okay, it isn't, but I'm still really curious and want you to tell me. Full disclosure: the Alayne Salmon character is me, and it's...not completely off-base? I do care a lot about my career, and I do like classic video games. But it also says I like bad boys...and girls...so it's not a how-to guide, either.

[Not that they need to be squeaky clean, but thaaaaat is not something she's going to talk about on the network.]

Anyway, I want to know who tried out some self-love and how well it ended. Myself and myself will be very happy together, apparently, but I lost a weekend to this game and got mixed results with Hannu Sololo, James Caligula and Bill Grimm.

Maybe I should be annoyed that the developer used our likenesses this way, but honestly, I had a lot of fun.

Comments

[video]

[ghoulking]

I was included and yes, I did my route. It was extremely frustrating, I must say, since getting to the good end was nearly impossible. [ he only got a good ending like... twice ]

I think I've tried most characters, though - but i haven't gotten every ending yet, of course.

[video]

[storyseeker]

Are you going to try for them all? That's dedication.

[video]

[ghoulking]

Don't you mean "boredom"? [ because he can only be very bored ]

[video]

[storyseeker]

Can't it be both?

very very anon.

[ewenique]

( ... which is not to say "uncrackable", but the security is high and any digging just leads to a deliberately accessible ("accessible") identity, The Wizard. )

It was a commentary.

[storyseeker]

What was the commentary trying to say?

[ewenique]

ImPorts and their issues are valued more as fiction and entertainment than as people.

Voice;

[bookkeeper]

Why would anyone want to play with a dating app? Just go out and do it.

[ Because that's so simple. Just don't get attached. Don't commit. ]

Voice;

[storyseeker]

[She could do it if she wanted to. She could get all the dates.]

Because dating is dating and games are games, and they have completely different objectives.

[bookkeeper]

No they don't. You still technically come out getting something.

video;

[heckblazer]

[ Someone is a little vain, so his recording includes the facial journey he has in reaction to her post, including a few looks that could only say "WHY WOULD YOU EVER". Eventually he clears his throat. ]

They couldn't seem to get my hair right.

video;

[storyseeker]

[He should know by now that that only encourages her.]

That might be a plausible deniability thing. If it doesn't look exactly the same, they can say it's not really you.

video;

[heckblazer]

[ And without skipping a beat: ]

You got the cult ending, didn't you.

VIDEO.

[accelerate]

If I was included in the app, I'd date myself.

[ that came out wrong. barry makes a face to communicate that. ]

I kind of dated my girlfriend. My friend who is a girl ... Girl friend. [ please stop. he sighs, annoyed at himself. ] And it was ... kind of weird? Kind of scarily accurate?

VIDEO.

[storyseeker]

At least you know what you're doing? Hopefully. Did it work out in the game?

VIDEO.

[accelerate]

[ he shakes his head. ]

She dumped me for her best friend! [ who is his sim, as a secondary character. but, you know, barry's dumb. ] I can't even tell you if that's even accurate. All I can say is that I've been nursing a broken heart with ice-cream. This game is dangerous. For real, soul-crushing dangerous.

[ he's joking. he ate a whole tub of ice-cream because he felt like it. ]

[video]

[carbonfrozen]

I stole your car, didn't I. [He sounds oddly proud of himself for that.]

[video]

[storyseeker]

Are you talking about the game or in real life?

[video]

[carbonfrozen]

Hey, you'd know if I borrowed your car in real life, I'd leave a note.

[...after the act, anyway.]

I meant the game.

video

[h2no]

I'm not included and it's a goddamn travesty I can't date myself. What's the point of all this egomania?

[he snorts.]

You know, I didn't even realise that one was you.

video

[storyseeker]

Maybe there'll be a sequel if it sells well enough? Wait, how did you not realize it was me? The sprite looks just like me.

[Also, the name thing.]

Re: video

[h2no]

...


...


Do I really have to admit out loud how long it took me to realise the characters were based on imPorts?

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Okay, so I heard about that? And I feel like a grandpa, yelling at the sky for no reason, because I can't seem to download the thing. It seems .. kinda weird, no? That people here are in it?

[video]

[storyseeker]

It is weird, but it's part of the whole imPort celebrity thing—you get used to it. Have you ever played a mobile game before?

[video]

[majorlyugh]

Yeah, of course. I got so into Candy Crush when it came out, I hated myself for weeks.