VOICE

[burlyboy]

Right, so. Thought experiment. Bear with me here.

Let's say you got a chance to go back and change whatever that dumb shit you did was - you know, the point where everything went wrong, or you wish you would've done something differently. Only if you change that, that means erasing everything that ever happened after too, good or bad. Everything you're proud of, and all the friends you made.

Would you do it?

[ Hm. This sounds super specific and super suspicious! HE'S JUST GONNA... COUCH IT A LITTLE. ]

I met a really weird witch, fellas.

[ #nailedit. Which is to say: hello, everyone, one Magnus Burnsides is back in town and, ostensibly, acting as though he never left! ]

Comments

[burlyboy]

Yeah. Thanks.

[ At least he sounds mollified now. ]

I mean, I did say why I brought it up. Ain't like I'd be able to think of a question like this on my own. I'm more of a live-in-the-present kind of guy.

[ no he's not ]

[viced]

Meeting a "Weird witch" doesn't explain much, you know?

[ A beat. ]

Would you?

[burlyboy]

Would I do it?

[ Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. ]

Not a would you kind of question. I didn't do it, and now I get to live with that. Can you blame me for wanting to hear what everyone else would do?

[viced]

Wouldn't it be the same for everyone else, though? Nobody gets the chance to redo the past. We just have to...live with the mistakes we make, and try to do damage control as best we can.

[burlyboy]

Nah, 'cause for everyone else, it's a hypothetical. For me, it was reality. You can't say that it's the same as everyone else when you got different opportunities than everyone else.

[ Then, after a considering pause: ]

But that's just my answer. What's yours? Or is that too personal?

[viced]

Oh, you had the option to go back in time and change things? Heh.

[ A beat. ]

As for me... I don't know. My choices are mine, and they were required by the world, and the circumstances around me. If I change them, then I could change the fate of my world as a whole, and I couldn't do that.

[ Yes. Yes. Yes. ]

[burlyboy]

So... you're saying that even if you'd change things personally, everything you did was for the greater good?

[viced]

Yeah. I'm a politician. I don't make my decisions lightly, and they impact... a lot more than just me.

Sometimes, I wished they didn't, but there's nothing for it, you know?

[burlyboy]

I guess not. So - so what you're saying is that whatever it is you regret is all about bein' a politician? No part of that's a personal decision?

[viced]

When you're on the national stage? Personal and political are all one thing. Optics can be personal, you know?

So yeah, I've made personal decisions, but they were just as important as anything else I decided.

[burlyboy]

I mean, sure, some of the personal stuff can affect whatever you're doin' in public, but that can't be all of it. There's gotta be some stuff that's all your own.

[viced]

Erm... Do you know what the definition of a workaholic is?

[burlyboy]

Yeah, but even the biggest workaholic's got other shit going on! I mean... friends? Family?

[ He's speaking now with the mounting desperation of someone who's becoming aware that the person they're speaking with may be a hell of a lot sadder than he first thought. Seriously. This is getting tragic. ]

[viced]

[ Buddy u don't know the half of it.......... ]

Well, they're coworkers? I mean... I have friends, of course. My mom died... [ A pause. ] Some time ago. It's not... that I don't.

But...they don't factor into any personal decisions.

[ AKA Everyone is an acquaintance. ]

[burlyboy]

[ Fucking yikes, Mitchell. ]

[burlyboy]

All right, sure, that's - that's cool. You, uh, having friends. Not the - you know, I'm sorry about your mom.

But what about here? You must've made closer friends here.

[viced]

It's fine, it was a long time ago, now. Especially after here. [ A beat. ]

I, erm, learned the hard way that was a problem. I did have close friends here, but... when you're still here and they aren't...

[ And even then, only one came close to really knowing Mitchell. Not even Bradbury had ever gotten so close to the truth. ]

[burlyboy]

Aw, pal.

[ POOR LONELY RICH BOY!! ]

Wanna go out for a drink sometime?

[viced]

Er --

Sure? I guess?

I'm not -- I don't really get pity drinks all that much. I mean, I'm a fucking senator, I'm not exactly shy on social engagements.

[burlyboy]

Hey, don't call it a pity drink, that's not cool!

[ It is absolutely a pity drink. ]

Call it a 'Beautiful New Friendship' Drink.

[viced]

Right, right. Is that what the kids are calling it these days?

[ A beat. ]

Yeah, okay. Why not? people always tell me to be more impulsive.

[burlyboy]

It's a date. I already got plans this evening, so... I'll call you!

[ He pantomimes a phone, and then apparently decides independently that this conversation's finished. BYE MITCH. ]