006 ♍ voice

[glowsferatu]

[ kanaya knows she has to make this confession, not that she's particularly looking forward to it. but now that they've put her in solitary, nothing about this punishment has been satisfying. she needs something better.

everyone needs to know, but she doesn't want their pity, and doesn't deserve their sympathy. so. she kind of goes a little too far in the other direction, there. ]

I've been quiet the past few days. I say this not as an apology, because I don't particularly give a shit, but as an explanation. For those who don't know me, my name is Kanaya Maryam, an for the past few months I've been moonlighting as a costumed thug. One might even go so far as to say I was a supervillain.

Shocking, isn't it? I was a bit surprised, myself. [ not that she's going to explain that one. ]

As Hobgoblin, I committed numerous crimes, whether disrupting traffic, harassing the costumed set, playing ghost in a haunted house, other, more serious infractions. Kidnapping. Stalking. And...worse than that. [ her flippant tone cracks, her voice falling low and shaky. ] I've-- I've hurt people. People who didn't deserve it. Innocents.

[ there's a fury brimming in that last word, a self-loathing and shame. she can feel her hands shaking, her knuckles going white as she balls her fists. but they won't see that, it's important that they don't. if they recognize any remorse, it will defeat the whole purpose.

she takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly as she collects herself again. ]

For all of these things, the most the local authorities have seen fit to do is stick me in a room alone without my powers. Which is really great, I must say. Wonderful to know that we feed and house our criminals when law-abiding residents have no such amenities, especially when they aren't registered! I must say this world's punitive measures are deeply impressive, it truly overwhelms me with compunction, how much softer-handed it is than I expected when I turned myself in. I suppose I shouldn't be really surprised, when the approach to everything is such a joke, such a limp attitude toward justice is at least consistent.

But it isn't real justice. It's a mockery. [ she thinks of terezi, and wonders if she'd be more embarrassed by the meagerness of it, or that kanaya submitted herself willingly. terezi would know what to do here. ]

I'm sure many of you could do better, someone who really believes in the subject, unless you're too stuck in all the nonsense moralizing humans too often preoccupy themselves with. You're heroes. I'm a villain. That seems simple enough to me.

If you want to see real justice done, I'm not going anywhere.

Comments

[deadtective]

Because people aren't goddamn props that you can drag into your drama because you're not getting your way. What you want has literally zero importance anymore.

Besides, even if someone kicked the shit out of you? It doesn't change anything. There's no closure. Talking to yourself in that cell or bleeding out in front of the courthouse - it's the same thing.

[glowsferatu]

werent you listening
im a supervillain of course theyre only props
what i want is tantamount above all
if it doesnt come to fruition then you had better believe ill alter what conditions i must until the outcome is more favorable

[ things she's pretty sure norman osborn actually believes. but he also wouldn't spell it out so plainly, which is why he won. ]

[deadtective]

Doing a real good job of that so far, aren't you. Maybe you should have taken your villainy lessons from somewhere other than cartoons.

[because who the fuck in the real world spells this kind of stuff out? it's so laughably absurd that if she weren't angry already she'd never be able to take this seriously.]

[glowsferatu]

they wont keep me here forever
when im out is when the true crime spree begin

[deadtective]

What are you going to do, steal the moon? That seems about your speed.

[glowsferatu]

i manipulate space
give me enough time and i could probably manage it

[deadtective]

Well, get on it. It'd probably be more productive than anything you've done so far.

[glowsferatu]

im currently depowered
obviously it will have to wait until after ive been released

[deadtective]

Why? It's pretty obvious you're not big on effective plans.

[glowsferatu]

youre kind of an idiot arent you

[deadtective]

Yes. Yes, this is the only logical conclusion that could have possibly been reached through this talk. You've really outdone yourself figuring it out.

[glowsferatu]

well i suppose ill just have to cut a hole in my ceiling then
once finished perhaps i can create a rudimentary rope from my ugly uniform
using that i can easily lasso the moon and then you will all be sorry

[deadtective]

I'll be sure to pull a limb of your choice off in penance once you get that done.

[glowsferatu]

take the left arm
the rights been through that enough already

[deadtective]

Maybe yours, but mine's sure seen better days.

[glowsferatu]

well by all means put mine to good use then
get me a saw a needle and a spool of thread and ill install it myself

[ she's being facetious, but. ]

[deadtective]

[Hazel was considering at some point mentioning that she'd sarcastically meant she was going to pull off one of her own limbs, but. well, Kanaya really doesn't deserve that kind of courtesy.]

Can't you get those yourself? I need my needle for more important stuff. Flip through a catalogue during your perpetual free time or something.

[glowsferatu]

[ no, she doesn't. she'll feel a lot more awkward about this later if she ever finds out hazel is literally sewn together already. ]

im the one going through the trouble of sewing it on for you with only one hand
you can at least provide the few supplies
i swear some people are just take take take without a ounce of give

[deadtective]

[well, if Hazel has her way no one else will. best case scenario this just remains a weird mutual sort of lashing out.]

I thought you were the one who wanted everything to be about a thousand times more of a hassle? You should be grateful I'm making it so difficult.

[glowsferatu]

and you expect theyll allow me to have a needle in here
theres a difference from wanting harsher conditions and contenting myself to jump through whatever hoops you please to take my arm and make it your own
you could at least put in a little effort

[deadtective]

I'm still texting you, aren't I? Look, no one's going to come barreling through your cell with a suicide vest on and detonate it anytime soon. You need to take what you can get.

[glowsferatu]

that isnt what im asking them to do either

its all moot anyway obviously the whole plot involving the moon was facetious

[deadtective]

Really? I hadn't noticed at all.

Honestly, you've got as good a chance of actually doing that as anything else you're trying for working out.

[glowsferatu]

well so far the closest thing ive gotten to torture is having to talk to you
so it isnt like youre wrong either

[deadtective]

Yeah, it happens a lot more than you'd think. I'm just trying to avenge the five minutes you murdered with this post at this point anyway.