video;

[whathawksdo]

[ Hawke's managed to master the video function!

Only she isn't featuring in said video herself, which, hopefully, will remain that way. Instead, she has the camera pointed at the cluster of dogs lounging around the random bus stop bench she's seated on somewhere in De Chima. The pack consists of dogs of many sizes, breeds, you name it, and not a single one even remotely belongs to her.

Therein lies the problem... ]

Now, the first month of having a very doggy entourage was undoubtedly fun and all, but I've found it actually does begin to wear on you when people start thinking you're stealing their pets on a regular basis.

[ At least the "piles of newspapers fetched and left at door" problem was solved by Dorian traumatizing half the dogs in the neighborhood, so, hey, there's that. ]

There is a way to shut off the random fun powers the porter hands out, isn't there? Just a little? You know, without shutting anything else more important off? If anyone knows, I'm all ears.

Comments

text; i missed u

[infomodder]

[Oh, he's never felt envy so deep and life-shattering until this moment. He didn't get to be almost forty years of age without realizing that life wasn't fair, true, but this is proof that there is no God. Or, if there is one (or several), they're unjust, wicked, foul creatures the likes no one could ever hope to understand.

all ears this world is backwards and terrible.]

It depends on how it functions, from what I've seen. Sometimes you can, sometimes you can't. Do you know what's causing this?

[THIS EXTREMELY GLORIOUS HERD OF OTHER PEOPLE'S DOGS IT'S SO BEAUTIFUL]

video; aw i missed u too

[whathawksdo]

[ Or maybe he just isn't as deserving of as many random dogs as Hawke is, so sayeth all gods (or at least the porter).

It takes an awful lot of normal dogs to make up for one missing mabari! ]

As far as I can tell, it just... happens? [ So no clue. ] I show up, dogs show up shortly after, then owners of said dogs much longer after.

video;

[oathkeeping]

Woah. All the dogs just started following you?

...that's so cool.

video;

[whathawksdo]

What do you mean that's so cold? I rather think dogs are the opposite of cold, with all that fur.

AUDIO.

[selfimage]

[ aside from the nullifiers that he had ganked over the year? well, not much. ]

Unfortunately it's not as simple as picking the black jelly beans out of the bag. It's either all or nothing.

[ there's a pause followed by a little "ah." ]

Why not take up dog walking? There's always a way to turn an annoyance into an opportunity.

AUDIO.

[whathawksdo]

So to keep all the magic, I also need to keep all the dogs. [ She sighs. ] Oh well, there are worse burdens in life...

[ There is a small pause after that, though, followed by an amused sounding question of: ]

Oh? And just how is dog walking an opportunity?

video

[aggressiveapathy]

Why would you want to?

video

[whathawksdo]

Reasons.

[ That may or may not involve trying to avoid further two-headed dog monsters. ]

Sometimes a girl wants to avoid being arrested for grand theft dog, though only sometimes.

video;

[selfpraise]

[Dorian doesn't normally hold grudges, but he might reconsider if this keeps up.]

It's not hard getting them to leave and I'll thank you to throw what you're wearing in the garbage before you return so you don't stink the place up.

video;

[whathawksdo]

[ Wow, and here she is, even trying to figure out a real solution to this problem. ]

Hmmm? Did you hear that? [ The dogs on the video feed perk up, obviously the ones being spoken to, not Dorian. ] A strange, high-pitched whining noise. What could it be? What... could it... be?

[ Although it doesn't help that they're being childish about this. ]

Oh! I know! It's Dorian! Hello, Dorian! Were you saying something?

voice

[hubris]

I've heard that wearing the scent of a big predator can ward off dogs.


...but then you'd have another problem.

voice

[whathawksdo]

Like bears. Bears would be a problem.

text; comm tag is "Tadashi"

[tadeadshi]

[It's almost like a siren call hearing people need help with suppressing powers, but first for now...]

How long have you had to deal with this? The owners do realize it's not your fault right?

video;

[whathawksdo]

[ Still only dogs on the video, but she answers just fine. ]

When I first got here, about a month ago. Strangely enough, most of them seem to not mind so much once I mention it's a power...

[sewoften]

[ this has ended up being a randomly common issue: completely bizarre powers that could theoretically be beneficial.......... in incredibly specific circumstances. (would it work with metaphorical dogs, he wonders.) ]

Not that I'm aware of, but you could probably market yourself as a canine whisperer and embrace the American ideal of capitalism in that sense, if you wanted.

[ #almost helping

Then again what do you expect out of the guy with an orange face mask on with his blond hair gently wafting in the breeze of... wherever he is. ]

[whathawksdo]

[ Dogs are beneficial in all circumstances, do not fool yourself. ]

I didn't say anything about whispering to them.

text

[unhidden]

Are any of them homeless?

( because

she wants them

oh uh also )

I guess I could try help. Animal control, hi.

( she would wave a little flag for her job, but... no. )

video

[whathawksdo]

[ Still dog video central, all the dog video time, but she does answer.

also no

if any of them are homeless they are all hers ]

No idea. Most of them have collars, so I imagine not. [ There's a short pause, but only as she tries to figure out if 'animal control' is a good thing or a bad thing. ] And animal control is...?

video;

[sizetwelve]

Just dogs?

[ Wow Mary, you're so helpful. ]

Like a dog whisperer? Imagine there must be a way to turn that off. You aren't sending out any signals you're aware of?

video;

[whathawksdo]

So far. If I start getting followed by cats or pigeons on top of that, I think it's time to stop leaving the house.

[ Especially if it includes pigeons. ]

Like a... no? I'm not sure. I've always been friendly to dogs, but that isn't anything unusual.

voice;

[sassguard]

[ Oh hey, it's her. Now he can actually mentally upgrade his association to an actual name instead of just 'strangely dressed blanket gifter.' ]

That's a pretty interesting problem to have. [ A pause. ] You tried just telling them to go away?

voice;

[whathawksdo]

[ At this point, she's shutting the video feed of the dogs off. You get straight on voice, not-so-old buddy. ]

Of course I have. It works on occasion, but not always.

video

[corviform]

... have they been normal dogs?

video

[whathawksdo]

[ Feathers! ]

I'm not sure I would call the little yappy ones normal, but none of them have tried to kill me in any alleys, if that's what you mean.

[capriciousrevolt]

Why shut it off? There has to be some way you can turn a profit off of... magical dog stealing powers.

[ My, that sounds ridiculous when he says it out loud. ]

[whathawksdo]

[ "Magical dog stealing powers". She files that one away for later use. ]

I suppose there's always becoming a ruthless criminal who ransoms off the dogs of the rich and the famous.

text

[cigarchomping]

I DON'T REALLY CARE AS LONG AS YOU DON'T BRING THE FLEABAGS HOME. BETWEEN YOU AND MR. MUSTACHE, THE PLACE SMELLS BAD ENOUGH ALREADY.

video

[whathawksdo]

[ How did she get stuck living with such wonderful, charismatic people?

A question for the ages, surely. ]

Ah, I was wondering when Complaining Man Number Two would show up. Let's see, this reads... you really care about dogs, that I should bring them all home immediately. Is that right?

video

[resipiscent]

Your power is, you steal dogs?

video

[whathawksdo]

It does seem that way, doesn't it?

video + subtitles forever

[nofollowing]

[ aaaand the signing begins, because Ig is being belligerent and enjoying not talking while he's a human. But he makes a face that's halfway between curious and confused because powers are weird, man. ]

Dogs like me too. And cats.

are there actual subtitles?

[whathawksdo]

[ Not sure what is going on here, squinting at her communicator. ]

Okay... lots of hand movement... What are you doing?

video;

[rideme]

That... is a hell of a lot of dogs.

[But hey! He sounds impressed at least.]

video;

[whathawksdo]

You think so? This isn't even the most I've picked up at one time.