001 | video

[ferrisbuellean]

[The video feed pans on to a well dressed, perfectly presented guy offering a winning smile as he sits in the booth of some fancy bar, all wood and leather, while nursing a glass of whiskey. Someone else is holding the camera and there's enough shaky cam and unfocused zooming to make the Bourne franchise jealous.]

Hey there. Do you like watching a ridiculously good looking man do law stuff? Want to watch him play some nondescript puzzle game on his phone for an entire hour? If yes, then have I got a surprise for you. If no, watch it anyway because apparently I need the ratings.

Jeff Winger here, Lawyer at Large and city hero bringing you a brand new series about me. [Another oh-so charming smile and a dramatic point to the camera.] And law!

Danger! Intrigue! Thrills! These are some things you'll probably never see in my show, but watch it anyway because hey, you might just strike it lucky. And ladies, you might just strike it lucky with me.

[Smirk smirk smirk, pause and then a glance off camera to someone, smugness replaced with a curious furrow of brows.] You guys do know I was disbarred ri-- [And the feed ends.]

Comments

[ferrisbuellean]

What are we gunning for? Seems like us being here is kinda pointless.

[selfequipped]

Depends on the thing of the week. But since we're here, civil liberties is a pretty big one. And for those of us who play hero, who wants to help. How we can help. Why they won't let us help.

It might be pointless, but we're here.

[ferrisbuellean]

Haven't they already got enough people living here to fight for civil liberties. Someone somewhere must be really bored if dragging us here seemed like a good idea.

[selfequipped]

Yeah, that would be Lachesis.

If the name sounds familiar, it's because she is the Fate. She's not someone who minds measuring too many threads. Numbers aren't really a problem for her.

[ferrisbuellean]

So you're saying fate literally brought us here? Like actual fate? Oh my God, I need to use that in a pick up line.

[selfequipped]

A Fate. Little different, but sure, you can feel free to use that in a pick up line.

[ferrisbuellean]

A fate? There's more than one?

[selfequipped]

Really aren't up on your Greek and or Roman mythology, are you?

[ferrisbuellean]

Nnnope. Apparently not enough. Should I be?

[Ain't nobody got time for studying ancient stuff.]

[selfequipped]

Do you plan on making lots of delightfully close-minded statements about our situation? Because if not, you're probably in the clear.

[ferrisbuellean]

I can probably avoid doing so. Are close-minded statements a thing around here?

[selfequipped]

Well, rants about how the government is wronging us for keeping us here even with all evidence pointing to the contrary ... I've heard a lot of them.

Some people like to repeat them, too. It fuels them.

Mostly, it's exhausting.

[ferrisbuellean]

Hey, you get enough people with enough power under one roof, aka the Government, and you're gonna get some shady business. Same as anywhere though. If people seriously think the Government are the worst, they really need to work in law for like... a day. Literally a day is all it takes.

[selfequipped]

Oh, the government is plenty shady.

I just like complaining about the shady things they actually do. Like branding us. Or forcing us to take their dog tags and then claiming it has nothing to do with the military. Or whatever else.

[ferrisbuellean]

Ugh, I know, right? The tattoos are just creepy. And all this talk of them tracking us? Sounds totally not shady at all.

[selfequipped]

They're a little lazy about it, but yeah. Several steps above whatever the NSA got caught doing.

And all because they're allowed to. We're aliens, even without the ... actually wide amount of alien features.

[ferrisbuellean]

Right, so normal rules don't apply to us because we're not, by their standards, from around here. That bodes really well for actual visitors from out of space in the future.

[selfequipped]

Miiiiight be a bit harder to collar extraterrestrials.

[ferrisbuellean]

I dunno, I've seen it in movies. That means it must be real.

[selfequipped]

The aliens I know are not easily collared, anyway.

First hand experience!

[ferrisbuellean]

You know aliens?

[selfequipped]

A few, yeah. It's not really a big thing. [Except for when there are Skrull invasions.

Then it kind of is.]

[ferrisbuellean]

It's a pretty big thing where I'm from. Aliens are what you see in movies and read about, not real things.

[selfequipped]

... Would it help if I said they mostly look like us? Humans, I mean.

[ferrisbuellean]

Humanoid aliens or like... shapeshifters?

[He can't believe he's even asking that.]