II : [video]

[closetshark]

[Pitch is draped over a dusty couch, in what is quite obviously an abandoned building. Cracks line the walls and plaster has crumbled to the floor in more than a few places. He looks... bored.]

What do you people even do? When you aren't scrabbling about for food and shelter to further your existences or causing emotional distress or simply wagging your jaws with things that have already been gone over or enjoying the sound of your own voices.

[Not that he doesn't enjoy the sound of his own voice. Obviously.]

I've been entertaining myself well enough the past few weeks but it gets... repetitive, spooking idiots away from places they shouldn't be.

And before you suggest it I am not getting some slave-wage "day job" or throwing my lot in with the government.

On an unrelated topic, if anyone wishes to get ahold of me for... whatever reason you think you might have, I'm feeling indulgent and willing to field some non-asinine questions.

Comments

Voice;

[kirisutegomen]

Have you got no pastimes? Unless spooking people and complaining about them are your pastimes.

Voice;

[closetshark]

There are only so many ruinous asylums you can tour alone, it gets a bit dull when intrepid explorers aren't there with their cameras and buzzing things to mess with.

audio;

[dragony]

Team sports. Street racing. Competitive cat breeding. By-numbers painting.

[ Bored, meet 'too emotionally uninterested to even manage the whining twang of bored' ]

Sleeping. Ranking dining establishments based on price and quality. Starting your own business. Blathering on the Network for entertainment. You seem to have the last one down without any help, though. [ not even judging, though. ]

audio;

[closetshark]

I'm not sure that "freelance professional haunter" is something anyone would pay me to do, and certainly not this time of year.

[There's a shift of the dusty rubble as he shrugs.]

It's been a few centuries since I've had much intelligent conversation, least of all something that isn't one sided.

[slightlyoffchilt]

I must admit, the idea of you married to a day job is an amusing concept.

[closetshark]

Me being married to anything is a laughable idea, the long lived don't exactly "settle down" to breed or pair off for the rest of their lives like mortals. Not that I haven't had my fancies, we just don't do "till death do we part".

[unbrkableteen]

[You did say non-asinine questions, right?]

What sort of stuff are you good at?

[closetshark]

Terrifying people out of their wits, crafting nightmares, I know every language ever spoken by humanity, stirring up lynch mobs, instigating mass hysteria, I'm a decent hand at dancing as well but I'm not about to teach any of you bumbling graceless apes.

voice;

[reptiledysfunction]

Catch a movie?

voice;

[closetshark]

[BIGGEST AGGRAVATED SIGH EVER.]

Which of the abysmal bores should I waste my time on? The blood bucket throwing "thriller" du jour? The painfully tedious "supernatural horror"? The glorified propoganda? The nausea inducing rest of the drivel?

I'd rather swallow glass and floss with razor wire thank you.

There hasn't been a good non-recycled film idea out of anywhere in well over a decade.

video

[mightiswright]

Learn how to play an instrument?

You can use it to add atmosphere for when you're spooking people. Nothing more haunting than eerie music coming from nowhere.

video

[closetshark]

...You do realize you're talking to a professional at terrifying people, correct?

[He's not lounging in an abandoned house for nothing.]

I invented that trick.

[ Video ]

[assonant]

[ Well, since he does seem to be taking suggestions... ]

Have you ever played video games?

[ Video ]

[closetshark]

Not really.

[They aren't as a matter of fact, really his thing.]

[VIDEO]

[ringthenoise]

[He studies Pitch a moment in the video before leaning back in almost in an almost exaggerated display of nonchalance.]

Beats me, man. Been trying to figure out the answers to those questions myself.

[VIDEO]

[closetshark]

[There's a mild look of suspicion at first, white hair really only belonged to one person Pitch knew but it's not Dante and he just raises a brow in mild interest instead.]

Really, let me guess the whole... government controlled 'hero' thing isn't something you want?

video

[attractedtodarkness]

Look for someone who's not easily scared.

video

[closetshark]

And... what? It's not like it would be all that terribly hard.

voice;

[godly]

And what was it you did when you were back home, in your own universe?

voice;

[closetshark]

Toured the planet at will, did my job for the most part.

[Planned and executed world domination.]

video

[aggressiveapathy]

There's always a future in community theater.

video

[closetshark]

I somehow doubt anyone would want to do Shakespeare for their entire career, you're not fond of iambic pentameter or blank verse.

Video; the LATEST VIDEO

[foreshadower]

Boredom is so easily found, isn't it?

I struggle with it myself, from time to time.

Video

[closetshark]

This is the first I've truly run in to it.

It's aggravating.

[symmachy]

"Spooking idiots away form places they shouldn't be." You sure that isn't a day job?

[closetshark]

It's mostly night work, really. There also aren't nearly enough of them around to keep me busy for long.