maskormenace | start of something shitty

So -

[ Okay. So this is some found-footage shakycam stuff right here. Kitty Jones is staring into the camera with eyes wide with alarm. Her voice is squeaky and nervous. Her hair is mussed. Her shirt is wet.

Don't ask how her shirt got wet. ]

So, erm, Billy and I were doing a little bit of a spell to make latrines self-regulating and it sort of went a little bit wrong and now toilets are sort of coming to life? So, erm - Oh, no, oh, look out, look out -

[ She swings around. The camera catches one William Kaplan, Center of All Magic In The Universe, with his hands lit up, struggling valiantly against a toilet that's pried itself up from its floorboards and is now clomp-clomp-clomping towards him on its base. With a flash, it's shattered into shards of porcelain; Kitty ducks, shielding her head. ]

Oh, not that one, too...

[ She turns back to the camera. ]

We - think that this magic is going to be radiating outwards. So everyone check your loo, but check really really carefully. I can come and undo it - if I touch them, they'll go quiet - but just be careful. Toilets, port-a-potties, outhouses, all of them, they're all hostile. Stay safe, and oh God make sure that you've flushed before you try to fight them, please make sure you've flushed.

[ ooc: So this is the post regarding the miniplot referenced here! Feel free to have your characters' toilets come to life. Kitty's warning is not completely correct: toilets will treat your character as they themselves have been treated. If your character has been neglectful of their toilet, doesn't clean, flushes cigarettes down it, buys super-cheap toilet paper, etc., then the toilet will be vengeful and wrathful. However, if your character treats their toilet well, keeps it clean and maintains it well, then the commodes will be as loyal and affectionate as golden retrievers.

Alternatively, have your characters' toilets not come to life because this plot is (as they say) very crappy. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Concerned about me? That's a first.

[ maybe if he doesn't talk about the fact that he got dead by toilet, no one will bring it up ever again...... ]

[ Oh. She lets out a breath, and then shakes her head. ]

How long have you been back?

I revived just a moment or two after I died via toilet. [ a pause, then explanation. ] Said toilet is now pushed out of a window, by the way.

[ Oh. Well - ]

Erm - yeah. Sorry about that. I'm pretty sure the government will replace that.

I know that you're probably going to hear this time and time again for the next few days, but really, Jones? Has your quest to change the world finally eroded your common sense?

[ A sigh. Here they go. ]

So you think that no one should ever use their powers?

There's a difference between using your powers and biting off more than you can chew. Kaplan's the latter. [ pause, frown, sigh. ]

Of course, you were probably the one that talked him into this scheme to begin with.

[ Excuse you. Bristling a bit: ]

Too right I did, and the reason I came to him is because he's really good with his powers, really competent. So I won't hear you sniping at him. Understand?

He brought toilets to life.

[ and then, with an annoyed siiiiiigh. ] It pains me to admit this, but Chilton's right: you're such an enabler.

Oh, my God. Magic's not like - drugs or alcohol! It doesn't hurt him to use it!

You know, it is possible to enable someone into doing bad decisions that don't involve drugs and alcohol. [ trust him, HE KNOWS. ]

If this had worked, it could have saved thousands of lives every year. How's that a bad decision?

The fact that you didn't consider failure is a bad decision enough.

Failure should have just been it not working. Not everything going mad like this. It was some sort of freak accident.

So it's sheer incompetence then?

Freak accident.

start of something shitty

video; LIKE AN HOUR AFTER HIS SNAFU WITH TOBY

video; :')

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