video;

[helpline]

[ The first thing you see....is pumpkins. So many pumpkins. This house is full of pumpkins in various stages of being carved. Those who know Hazel can easily recognize this scene of mass chaos as Residence #11. However, the chalk scribbles on the wall are decidedly not hers. To start with, some of them are in a different language that looks kind of circly.

The personless scene lasts only for a moment before the Doctor scurries into frame, looking a mixture of confused and frowny. He's looking kind of magician, wearing a black coat over a black hoodie. Finally, he's holding an owl by the scruff of it's neck (can you do that with an owl? Who knows, the Doctor's doing so). Said owl is Owlfonso, the skateboarding owl that really doesn't want to be here right now and is desperately trying to peck the Doctor's fingers. ]

I want to clarify first that for once, none of this is my fault. [ except the chalk writing, which is obviously his, but that either a: goes without commenting on or b: the Doctor's forgotten it by now. also wow, that sure is a Scottish accent ] That being said- [ WHAM the camera gets a face full of owl ]

Is this normal? I mean, normal for owls. Is this how I can tell this dimension apart from my dimension? No eyepatches, no goatees, just owls that can suddenly skateboard? [ He backs poor Owlfonso away from the camera, as the Doctor's still got an expression that's pure 'what the hell is this shit' ] Well, skateboarding owls and a postponed perestroika. Spoilers, you're twenty years out of date.

[ pause, frown. The Doctor looks over at poor Owlfonso with a sort of resigned expression. ] The alternate dimension of owls and Communism. Oh how the mighty have fallen.

Comments

[glitterateur]

Oh! Yeah that makes sense. [As a Serious Businesswoman, she knows that's pretty not okay.]

But still you repelled an entire invasion! That's worth an employee of the month sticker at least.

[helpline]

Time Lords aren't too big on stickers. [ but hey, now that she's asked.... ]

Please tell me that despite his terrible despotic reign, the Time Baby at least has stickers.

[glitterateur]

I didn't see any! But he did give us a time wish which was pretty cool? I dunno if he's allowed to have stickers anyway since, y'know, he's a baby.

[And babies eat stickers. Common sense, Doctor!]

[helpline]

[ hey now, it's been over a hundred years since he's seen a baby, he doesn't know entirely how they work!!! ]

They should make baby stickers or something like that.

[glitterateur]

Stickers are a big responsibility! And it's so easy to accidentally eat them. [She says, from experience.] I guess if we could make ones too big to fit in their mouths but small enough not to suffocate them if they stuck them on their faces it could work....

[helpline]

What about stickers they could breathe through? That should work, right?

[glitterateur]

Oooh! Yeah. Made with a breathable sticky fabric!

[helpline]

We should get on that. Given enough time and energy, I'm sure I could develop some sort of breatheable loose-knit type of sticky fabric.

[glitterateur]

Wait wait wait do you do time travel and cool mad science junk? Awesome!

[helpline]

It is pretty cool, isn't it? [ said with a griiiiin ]

[glitterateur]

The coolest! You work on the sticky fabric and I'll work on a punny name for it, okay?

[helpline]

[ and the camera gets a THUMBS UP ]

Between the two of us, we've got this in the bag.