Jeffrey Tobias Winger (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
textualhealing) wrote in ![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png)
maskormenace2016-09-23 10:32 pm
textualhealing) wrote in maskormenace2016-09-23 10:32 pm
Entry tags:
- harleen quinzel | harley quinn,
- † bela talbot | n/a,
- † count dooku | darth tyranus,
- † dorian gray | n/a,
- † dorian pavus | lucerni,
- † elliot alderson | mr robot,
- † frederick chilton | chief of staff!!,
- † jeff winger | wingman,
- † joel | n/a,
- † kitty jones | n/a,
- † leonard mccoy | n/a,
- † sasha blouse | n/a,
- † ted kord | blue beetle ii
006 | voice
I’m going to be honest with you here network, I’ve been avoiding you.
It’s not you, it’s me. I just needed some time apart from all the self-congratulating, needy social media bullcrap that this network breeds. I mean, it’s no Rumblr, but sometimes it comes a close second.
Pro tip: if it’s not about me I’m just not interested. [Hopefully that’s a joke, but there’s a big possibility it isn’t.]
But I’m here to extend the olive branch of apology for depriving you of my company for a long ass amount of time, and also remind you that the second season of my show finished airing not so long ago, so buy that shit when it’s on DVD so I can get your money. Or… a very small percentage of it.
[Best salesman ever.]
It’s not you, it’s me. I just needed some time apart from all the self-congratulating, needy social media bullcrap that this network breeds. I mean, it’s no Rumblr, but sometimes it comes a close second.
Pro tip: if it’s not about me I’m just not interested. [Hopefully that’s a joke, but there’s a big possibility it isn’t.]
But I’m here to extend the olive branch of apology for depriving you of my company for a long ass amount of time, and also remind you that the second season of my show finished airing not so long ago, so buy that shit when it’s on DVD so I can get your money. Or… a very small percentage of it.
[Best salesman ever.]
Voice
[Joking but not really joking.]
Voice
[So overacted, as if he cares about discounts.]
Voice
But I also have concerns. I am sure your entertainment show keeps you quite busy, and you have so many clients. Can I be sure you will always be available to represent my interests?
Voice
Voice
I am so pleased that we agree on these matters. I already feel as though we can have a most fulfilling relationship if I become your client.
Voice
Plus, only keeping to imPorts means more one to one time and more time spent understanding the loopholes of imPort law. [Beat.] Intricacies, I meant intricacies, not loopholes.
Voice
[You're making a great first impression Winger.]
Your reputation as a champion of imPort clients is as widespread as it is well-deserved. But of course, you have been practicing in our community for quite some time, haven't you?
[Dooku does his research.]
Voice
You've been keeping tabs on me, huh? Nice. Then you already know I've been doing this almost as long as I've been here, which is close to a year and a half now. That's practically an eternity for an imPort like us, sooo you've got the added bonus that it's unlikely I'll vanish any time soon, and if I were to I got contingency plans in place. Y'know, just standard reassurances for this volatile set up us guys have got.
[He might not need to sell himself, but he's doing it anyway. Any excuse to talk about his greatness.]
My office doors are always open to a guy with your kinda prestige.
Voice
Very good then. I will visit you in person within the week to discuss the particulars of what you can do for me. I am especially interested in defending my person against any slanderous rumours which may arise in response to my political activities.
[Like, hypothetically speaking, someone starts making crazy accusations about him being a war criminal, Sith Lord, or aspiring imPort revolutionary. Stuff like that.]
Voice
Sweet. Come to the Heropa office, it's altogether a nicer time. Looking forward to seeing you, Count.